There were a lot of pages about his family which, as I have mentioned before, was a train wreck. The state took him from his birth mother because of neglect and he ended up with his grandmother and step-grandfather who drew a check on him because of his allergies and skin. He never knew who his birth father was but I was told it was a stepbrother in the household with his Mom. There was resentment there for him not coming forward. On and on it went for page after page of things being examined closely for motive and opportunities lost. I was the least of his resentments besides Lauren. I believe that he knew I loved him with all my heart and that he didn't have a clue what to do with it.
More and more often I see that we are where we are because of decisions made of free will. Dissecting the reasons for those choices is a healthy act in retrospect but also a good tool to use when considering the proverbial next move. To act with thought and wisdom vs. blindly pushing forward is a much smarter way to be and quite hard for an ADD control freak. If I wasn't afraid of getting addicted I'd get me some Adderol. Today's good news on CNN was about how numerous fatal overdoses have been chalked up to so called "hydros" or percocets actually being made of homecooked Fentanyl. Which brings us all back around to where the whole thing started. It's time for an honest discussion about the dangers of opiates because they are socially acceptable and widely prescribed. Medical cannabis is a much more effective long term pain reliever with relatively few side effects compared to pharmaceuticals. Like, duh.
There is a place for opiate based medicine and that is for short term control of severe pain as in after surgery or trauma. For physician mills to be making millions off of government healthcare dollars by handing out scripts is absurd and
My dear friend CB returned to the sawmill today and gave me a big hug which I've missed. She'll come out of nowhere with a look or a "what's up" and snatch me back to the fact that I'm truly loved. I haven't talked to my only aunt in eons so I called her yesterday and we talked about every little thing because I needed to hear some memories.
Gotta run because Gigi is on the way and we need to get a little crazy like we used to at the pool. Or not because this is domino night and she does love a good game. Nothing like the sound of ivory slapping a bar with a side bet in progress. Add the jukebox and a few beers and you have yourself a great time going. She tans and butters so the dogs went nuts licking her legs under the kitchen table. Sammy D is the world's worst because he licks EVERYTHING including the windows and covers. I reckon he has issues. She's leaving for the beach on Saturday a week ahead of me. I'm assuming she'll kiss the beach for me and get it ready.