Wednesday, May 24, 2017

back to step one

My heart sank when I checked my balance yesterday and found myself in the hole with ten days to go until the eagle poops.  I have no savings or even any cushion....just living check to check as a single gal.  I was cutting it close what with the impound fee and new tires so when I got paid on Friday I immediately paid what HAD to be paid or get cut off.  Posting is wonky on the weekends so I didn't realize until yesterday I had gone into overdraft again.  35 bucks a pop times 2.  I immediately realized I'd have to put off my appointment with the derm folks for this squamous cell thing because I didn't have the money.  I made the call and cancelled then shut the laptop and wandered outside to walk the yard.

*kaching* went the phone.  It was a message from a lifelong friend offering help.  And then others came through for me today.  I am humble beyond words.  

Got a call from the police this morning that I was being served with a summons to appear in court for the State vs car thief.  What's so ironic is that his court date is at 9AM on the same day I report for jury duty at 1PM.  I feel the universe moving on that deal.  

And so it goes.  I feel like my tribe has me enfolded in their arms and that all will be well as long as I continue to do the next right thing.  

Faith ~

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

chicken killers

My neighbor Bev called today wanting to know if I had seen strange dogs around to which I replied no.  A pair of dogs killed two of her chickens and she even saw one headed down the road with the poor bird in his mouth.  This is the very reason that Larry went to a "new " home because he was trying to get to her birds.  It's like a zoo down there with chickens and ducks and even a huge rabbit on the back porch in a crate.  Country girl to the core.  

Two days on my feet have pretty much negated that restful weekend but it was good while it lasted.  Hopefully I'll catch up over the Memorial day break which happened upon me quite serendipitously thanks to Sue and Kim.  I'll pay the piper later but it's worth it.  It's been a year since my last vacay to the beach and things don't look too good for time off in the near future.  

I'm sickened over the most recent suicide bombing in England that targeted kids.  This is the kind of thing that makes me vow never to fly commercial OR attend an event at a huge venue.  The idiots are everywhere just plotting damage for the glory of Allah.  Heh.  And people thought us old hippies were radical.  

While waiting for Bloodline and OITNB I've started over with Weeds and just loving seeing young Strange Botwin again.  Little boxes on the hillside little boxes made of ticky tacky!  I've pretty much checked in with everybody important so it's time to play with the redneck water hose.  

Love ya.  Mean it.  

Monday, May 22, 2017

okay i lied

I'm addicted to this writing thing and can't go a day without spewing my thoughts out into cyberspace.  Today has been a blessed one with lots of random conversations with people who love me.  Me and BG actually hooked her up with an Uber ride home from work.  Small world.

I've got the redneck waterhose going out back hanging on the company logo chair I got two years ago.  I move it around over the little straw bale patch.  Sometimes God works in mysterious ways when you show up and do your part.  So far mr snake has been hiding in the wheat.  It's about cuttin' time so I figure they'll all be up around here and I'll have to put the dogs and calico on them.

Always forward~

Sunday, May 21, 2017

save the turtles

After sleeping in again I went grocery shopping finally because well, you can only eat so much fast food.  Another gentral run to get the hummingbird feeders I forgot and then one last run to the chicken store.  As I was pulling out from Samaria Bend by Tiffany's corner, I spotted a huge turtle smack in the middle of  51 North.  As I sat there watching traffic pass it was pretty cool to see how every single vehicle went AROUND him instead of just making him road kill.  By the time I came back 10 minutes later, he was gone.  It just took him minute to get across the road into the ditch.  

The weather is gorgeous...perfect for outside play which is where I'm headed.  Ya'll hold it between the lines and keep the faith ^j^

Saturday, May 20, 2017

out and about

I slept until 930. It was heavenly for sure.  I feel sorry for people who aren't wired to rest for a long time because that's the only thing that keeps me going.  I started with Lowe's where I scored two five dollar ferns because they "have too many."  Hell yes.  I was also on the hunt for LED light bulbs and compost.  I found both and even advised a man to buy the humus rather than topsoil for his planting.  Yep...I'm on fire for gardening!

Next was the pharmacy where I ran into my Bubba and we chatted in the parking lot. " Don't leave your keys in the car" he said.  Smartass!  From there it was downtown to pay off my tires and visit the crack dealer Pennington's where we were all entertained by a man who does amazing card tricks.  My buddy Stanley is sort of my personal shopper there. I ran into the same couple I had seen at Lowe's so I reckon everybody's on a mission.  

As I was headed over the bridges toward the south I passed a figure shrouded in white carrying a "repent" sign.  That's not something you see everyday but then again.....I just drove on past her toward the 'gentral where I found a cute cheap dress and shoes and stood in line for about 15 minutes while the poor manager/cashier multitasked her little heart out while: talking on the phone about deposits, blowing up helium balloons for a baby shower and generally doing a good job at all of it.  There is a new store in RoEllen and her manager is going there plus two of her recent hires. It's not fair but it's the way things go.  

There is a golf tournament going on behind me to benefit Youth Villages which is an annual fundraiser for them.  It's busier than usual over that way obviously.  Local businesses sponsor teams which is a nice way to do things.  Our city course is very very nice considering the size of our town.  

Seize the day ~

Friday, May 19, 2017

the week that would not end

Today was chaos from start to finish just like the entire rest of the week.  If i didn't have a calendar in front of me I couldn't even tell you what day it is.  Oh's Friday.  Thank goodness.  And I'm off the weekend.  Do I hear an amen?

I brought work home with me because it's too chaotic up in there to concentrate on anything other than keeping the boat floating.  As you may have noticed, I had my first encounter with mr snake yesterday afternoon and he was huge all curled up around the straw bale in the cool dampness.  He got sprayed with the water hose and slithered off somewhere else to hide and scare the bejesus out of me another day.  I don't care if they are good ones, I hate them in my space.  

The car thief was due in court again today so I'll have to go check and see it he got sprung or got additional charges.  My guess would be the latter.  Tomorrow will be errand day because I haven't had time for squat lately.  Gotta' pay the piper and all that.  

I hear thunder and I do believe a nice thunderstorm would be a proper finish to this day as long as the power doesn't go out.  Then it's plan B.  

Adios ~

Thursday, May 18, 2017

today's news

Okay, I am totally floored that Trump is considering Uncle Joe for FBI director unless there is something about his becoming an indpendent that I'm missing.  At a time when this country should be moving forward and seeking change for the masses the media and the GOP are still rehashing old news like Benghazi and Hillary's emails.  Both were mistakes and cannot be undone.  Let it go.  

I've never been a big grunge fan but was shocked to hear about the suicide of Chris Cornell following a show in Detroit.  Who knows what the demons were, but evidently it was bad enough to be done with a life that included a stunning career in music and a family.  More shades of 13 Reasons I reckon.  

Tomorrow is payday and hopefully there will be enough to pay off the tires, internet, garbage pickup and more plus buy a little food.  My dinners lately have consisted of cheese sammiches and fast food reheated.  I have one tiny little head of brocolli on the one plant that survived the early planting.  I'm ready for round two in ernest after Patrick's tilling.  More compost and straw are on Saturday's to do list.  

The orange day lilies are heavy with buds that should show up pretty soon and then the spring flowers will be gone.  That's always a bummer.  Even the hostas are sending out the shoots that will bear flowers.  We're about a month ahead of usual on everything.  

Watch out for snakes ~

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

drama mamas

I am such a live and let live person that those who bitch and piss and moan literally wear me down.  They're work and on occasion I'm one of them.  Normally I stay clear of the conflict but as it swirls around you it's hard to ignore.  Friends and family also have things that are distressing and I have to set limits when discussing their issues so as not to get sucked in.  It's a learned behavior and therapy plus a desire for sanity have helped me to stay out of the fray.  

The wind is fierce and hot from the south slapping the crepe myrtle all over the tin roof of the basement steps.  I touched base with Hub who is the contact person for this family ash spreading next week and he promised to give me a call when his friends get here.  I love that little piece of history which has been added to our story by the universe.  

We are blessed this week with George Patton who is one of my all time favorite field reps and Methodists.  We discussed the changes coming with Annual Conference and who's getting whom in between calibrations, phone calls and all the rest of the chaos that is the lab.  Cousin Marilyn stopped by while I was out and left a message that she loves me and was going out to steal my car!  Gotta love it.

Millette sent me a pic this morning of my wedding day where my blushing bride self was flanked by my mother and grandmother aka Gaga.  That was 38 years ago and I looked very young which I was.  I wore my late cousin Debbie's wedding dress and the maids were dressed in yellow gingham.  Total vintage 70s cuteness. We got an emergency call from the best man on the day before that the pants to his brown tux didn't fit but that got fixed somehow.  I cried all the way down the aisle on my Daddy's arm to face my future husband in front of Willis G and Oscar Bruce at FUMC on the corner of Main and McGaughey.  It being May and all my mother was stoned on allergy meds and sat on the carpeted steps next to me before her escort down.  

My DSL went out night before last while I was watching Bloodline getting ready for season 3 so I spent 30 minutes on the phone lining up a tech visit for today.  He came and fixed a broken wire at the box on the road before I even got off.  Thanks dude!  Hotspot uses too much data.  According to the locals, I'm at the end of the line for their reach from Troy Avenue.  I expect them to cut me off any time because of the hassle of keeping one customer online.  It's my only option other than satellite which costs twice as much.  

That's all I know other than I'm uneasy about the upcoming impeachment because then all the focus goes from Trump to Pence and Ryan and that's even scarier.  Who the hell is Pence anyway????

Faithful always ~


Tuesday, May 16, 2017

arrogance personified

You would think that after 40 years of working with doctors who think they're gods I would be used to a tongue lashing.  Actually it hasn't happened for a very long time until today and it totally caught me off guard.  I'll spare the details but I was humiliated in front of my peers one more time.  It will be the last.  "He's been in a mood" she said.  Not acceptable in my book.

Corporate ag came and went quickly and I never saw him.  He and Bubba visited Mozella and caught up on some family history with William.  That's it until the big house moving in the fall.  There will be a memorial service over Memorial Day weekend out here behind the dairy barn for some folks who worked Ferguson Farm back in the day.  Ashes to ashes and all that.  I hope to meet up with the fam and do some pics for them so they can concentrate on the ceremony.  

My mama always told me if you don't have anything nice to say just shut up.  That is what I'll do now because I'm smooth worn out with the drama of every day life.  There seems to be very little justice in the world and when there is it's about making money.  

And so it goes ~

Monday, May 15, 2017

and the cupboard was full

Today has been a whirlwind sort of thing.  I swapped hours and went in at 6 so that I could get BG on the road back to Jackson and ended up stuck past quitting time.  I scurried on home and scooped her and we did a little business before hitting 412.  That's when the phone started ringing.  Now, I cannot talk and drive, I'm just saying.  She answered the phone once and it was Bubba who understood.  My other neighbor who's been sick down at the mayor's house called and asked me if I could bring her some distilled water for her C-Pap when I got back to town.  Okay then.  After passing by some sort of huge fire at Crockett Mills and stopping in at the Four Points 'gentral I found them to be "out."  Seeing as how I'm almost a nurse I figured bottled water would work so I got her two big ones and proceeded to deliver them.  No answer at the door.

I was pulling out when I saw a young woman and child in the yard waving at me so I pulled back in and explained that it was all they had.  Don't you want to come in and see her, she asked.  That's when I slammed the door on my finger and hollered SHIT.  Next step is to ice that baby down.  It's the bird finger on my other hand opposite where I dislocated the same one so I'm sure arthritis will have me by the middle finger soon.  

Anywho, my buddy Kevin came to and shared about all his adventures like dog burying ( can I relate! ) and Mondays are crazy.  My friendship with him began many years ago at First United Methodist Church in Youth Club.  He came with his buddies and is now a devout Nazarene.  

I love it when that happens ~

Sunday, May 14, 2017

yo mama

Today is the one where we honor our mothers with something special.  I got an early wakeup call from BG and headed to Jackson to pick her up.  She had just finished a ten hour graveyard shift and was helping people out with breakfast when I got there.  After a brief stop to purchase a quart of oil from Mr. Indian store owner and putting it in the Camry, we headed for home.  It's a gorgeous day but already hot and sultry like Tennessee summer.  

We hit up the 'gentral at Four Points for pillows and I dropped her tired bones at the house while I made a trip to put some pink peonies on Mom's grave.  I didn't stay long because she is not there.  After that I stopped by the rehab to visit Mozella only she was sound asleep so I asked the roommate to tell her I had stopped by.  On the way out I ran into a Mr. John Stafford and we quickly found a common link what with the name and all.  He's from the Lenox tribe but just so happens to be a parishioner of my daddy's late cousin's husband Bill Oakley.  And he was waiting on a ride to church in his motorized wheelchair.  Small world indeed.

Last stop was Sonic for a bacon double cheeseburger for us to split.  Presently Lauren is passed smooth out in my room with Oscar at her feet.  They were ECSTATIC to see her.  She's in a lot of pain because of an old tailbone injury and can have nothing but tylenol so it's pretty miserable.  

I sent a message to the City of Dyersburg praising the officer who worked my case, Ms. L Ward.  They had been looking for this guy for awhile and he was wanted in a string of car break ins and thefts.  Stealing my trusty little Camry was his last act aside from breaking into the other guy's truck to sleep.  Ironically, I got a summons for jury duty in yesterday's mail.  Hmmmm.

And justice for all ~

Saturday, May 13, 2017

insult to injury

After a 12 hour nap I got up and ready for a 'gentral run and popped the trunk to load garbage bags.  That's when I discovered that the sonofabitch who stole my car took the spare, presumably to sell the rim.  Which I'm sure was on his agenda before he left the car at the mall.  The scrapyard is closed today ( right on Samaria Bend ) but I will be up there on Monday with asshat's picture and my car asking if anybody remembers anything.  They see so much of that kind of stuff I doubt it but who knows.  Maybe they have cameras or something.  

His bond was set at 12,500 in court yesterday so here's hoping nobody cares enough to get him out because my keys are still out there floating around somewhere.  From what I hear the guy who found him asleep in his truck is over six feet tall and dude is a scrawny little fucker.  He had broken INTO the truck and was taking a little nap.  I also noticed that when I picked the car up the tire iron was right next to the driver's seat  meaning he was ready to whack something or somebody.  The whole thing makes me physically sick.  

It's a whole 'nother world out there on the streets amongst the thieves and addicts.  Most crimes of this type are committed by someone feeding a drug habit, and around here it's usually meth or crack or opiates.  TONS of meth because we are redneck central.  

I went to Hulu to watch the handmaids and found that I've changed cards since I last logged in.  Oh well.  That can wait for payday.  Meanwhile, the garbage folks have cut me off and I don't blame them.  It was nice while it lasted.  I'm in the hole because of having to pay the towing bill unexpectedly.  Thanks scrawny little mofo meth head.  

This is the second mother's day without hearing mine's voice.  Last year I went into total meltdown mode and cried all day.  This year I will honor her with a vase of peonies at her grave.  I had hoped that BG could come home for a couple of days so we could be together.  We'll see how things work out.  With both of us working and no backup plus one car and 45 miles between us it's like working a puzzle.  

I'm going through hand me downs from Katie and keeping the onesies that are gender neutral.  There are promises all over of a swing, pack and play, high chair and more.  Reaves will totally have what she needs.  I feel for BG being mega pregnant in August and September.  Been there done that and it wasn't fun.  

If you see Jessie Pinkman on a bike holla ~

Friday, May 12, 2017

taking care of business

My brothers and daughter and I have talked about my final wishes which include cremation and a memorial stone in Gerald's front yard burial ground all legal and whatnot thanks to Bubba. I have always been fascinated by the place and even climbed through sticker bushes before it was cleaned out.  It's a well maintained and shaded spot near the Forked Deer river on a slight hill which I fell down once and tore a hamstring.  That shit bad~ My whole leg turned purple and I couldn't sit for about 3  months.  Lauren was there with me and it freaked her out!

Thank you sweet baby jeebus, today was better at the sawmill.  I was so tired after the past three days that I overslept this morning.  That's what the "meh" was about.  I have really cool neighbors and Pat stopped by for a beer and some chat yesterday on his way to mow the yard.  Mamye was doing the first of a three day run delivering Mother's Day flowers.  I talked to many people and told the same story about 100 times.  The jokes are still flying about the ugliest car in that lot getting stolen.  Dude will be incarcerated for a very long time...just saying.  He's got a rap sheet a mile long at 26.  What a waste of life.

I've been so busy I only that Trump is heading at warp speed to the end of his not so historical term because people don't like it when he fires the head of the agency invesgating his election for fraud and or tampering.  It's good to see Kelly Baby out there cheering for him again.  She's been out of sight for some time thank goodness.  My next show is the Handmaiden one.  That should help my attitude toward the government, right?  

Peace be still ^j^

Thursday, May 11, 2017


I'm sitting here waiting on a stray thunderstorm to water my garden which will probably happen according to weather underground.  It's like only without the ads.  There's a handy little phone app.  I should probably sprinkle a few osmocote pellets beforehand.

I called the DPD today to see what's up with little car thief but the Captain didn't return my call.  Voicemail for all!  I did get an answer at county that the perp didn't have any keys on him when booked early yesterday.  He probably dropped them in the mall.  

On so many levels I am weary.  At 61 I cannot continue to do the job of two people that requires constant motion on bad tennis shoes plus a side of stress.  Life is short, and then you die. I finished up 13 Reasons and was amazed at the dedication of this production crew to bring up these issues and play them out.  This shit is real and happens everyday just like crackheads stealing cars.  

There are no rose colored glasses here.  Just the truth~

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

lost and found

My car is unmistakably tacky and loud to say the least.  However it has four new tires and a door handle which I cherish.  After being dropped off at home and visiting with Mamye and cussing a blue streak about thieves, I settled in for my daily piddle.  Jillzy called me late afternoon and said she had seen my car parked at the mall and the guy was headed into JC Penney, presumably to steal some more stuff.  She quickly called 311 to report on the situation.  About an hour later I got a call from a cop telling me my car had been found abandoned in the parking lot.  I had no way to get there and wasn't sure where the keys were so it had to be towed.  

This morning I called good old Ann at Patterson Brothers to find out what to do.  The towing cost, on me, was 137 bucks with tax and luckily I had that amount to get it out of the lot.  I am broke as a goose now, but that's not unusual.  I needed my car.  The rental was cancelled and the Progressive agent was thrilled to not have to pay anything but the 37 bucks over my co-pay.  

My little friend took me to the lot where I found the trusty Camry wedged tightly between 2 other vehicles.  What I found when I opened the door was a shocker.  Before he abandoned the car this guy had stolen ANOTHER bike and it was in the backseat, crushing my prescription glasses.  There was a backpack in the front seat and the white Jessie Pinkman style hoodie he had been wearing was stuck under something in the back floorboard.  Umm..okay.  So I went to the PD and asked to see the captain in charge with this additional evidence.  They took pics and removed said items.  Though they did not share the information with me, I found that he was booked into county this morning for some other mischief.  Captain said to contact him tomorrow for a full report on my particular part of the ongoing investigation of a crackhead on the lam.  There was some odd looking set of keys stuck in the ignition and thank God I had found the other set.  However, that leaves the original keys either still in his possession or in a personal belongings bag at the jail.  I feel very violated and it's creepy thinking about this idiot driving around in my car.  I hope they throw the book at his sorry ass.  And also that I get my keys back.

My buddy nicknamed me grand theft auto today and the whole sawmill has been abuzz with the goings on.  I'm just glad it's over for now.  Please call me as a witness for the prosecution.  Pretty please.

I had forgotten what it's like to be putting out fires all day while trying to work and keep up.  It's not a good feeling but I did it for a lot of years when my parents were alive.  And, of course, I would do it all again.  

Forward ~

Tuesday, May 9, 2017


In copspeak that means be on the lookout, like for stolen cars. Today as been surreal on a lot of levels.  I showed up at six for work and did what needed to be done at the moment.  After breakfast I clocked out to drive over to an alternate campus for a smoke.  Only the trusty Camry was not there.  There was a kids size bike with neon green tires laid against the rail where my car used to be.  Somebody else snagged that spot after he rolled out.  

I called the law and hospital security and then we all went up to review the camera footage of said suspect trolling the parking lot in broad daylight.  They took the bike as evidence and all.  The status of the case is "pending arrest" whatever that means.  Mamye picked me up from the sawmill and bossfriend is taking me in tomorrow morning.  Hopefully the rental will come through soon.  There's a big celebration going on up there right now....a family picnic complete with bouncy house.  

I had a bit of a karmic experience this morning with a really self absorbed sort of guy who was a random date during the years that I did that sort of thing.  Things don't look really good for him at this point.  I also visited our mayor and gave her a kiss.  

I just got word that the car was found abandoned at the mall by whomever.  It was fascinating watching this guy on video footage scoping out cars in broad daylight for something to steal.  He was obviously on a mission to steal shit per the bicycle and bags MO.  I showed up at work at 6AM and he did his business during the next 30 minutes. 

Such is life, huh?  

Monday, May 8, 2017

the rest of the story

My daddy knew the history of the man he worked for.  I remember a tale about how Harry the unborn baby lost his father in the icy winter of Reelfoot Lake while on skates duck hunting.  Today I talked with a woman whose father found that well preserved body, frozen in time.  Her daddy's uncle was with him and he told him to stay there while he walked the woods to Tiptonville to get help.  She said that in 1982 that baby came to visit her....just always had wanted to get some closure.  

The widow with a young child remarried and the Ferguson Farm era began.  That was during the peony farm and animal raising days.  Plus a pond with swans, according to Miss Mary.  I'm glad I've at least kept the asparagus farming thing alive.  The peonies in the pine grove should be ready for Mother's day which is on me this year.  It's been awhile since I visited.  

My redneck sprinkler is currently rigged up and just needs to be moved now and then.  It's hot and dry but I sprinkled some osmocote over everything before hand.  It will help the grass to grow!

Sunshine ~

Sunday, May 7, 2017

will work for insurance

That's what most of us are doing truth be told.  Early retirement is 62 and there's not a whole lot of money difference as you get older.  You just can't get the healthcare piece until age 65.  You can also earn about 17K per year while drawing SS.  That's because nobody can afford to live on it!!  I started drawing my pension from Methodist at 55 because I need it.  It's a lifetime annuity and I gave up 400 a month to draw it early but who the hell knows if I'll be here at 65?  I mean seriously.  

The red winged blackbird that perches on the baby pecan tree outside the bathroom window has become my constant totem representing change and moving forward without fear.  Going with the flow, so to speak.  I am so down for that.  

Speaking of which, I have the total solution for healthcare reform right here in my pointy little head.  All the GOP folks are hollering more power to the states so I say hand it over to them to develop a single payer system for their citizens.  Healthcare is the biggest industry in our state so surely we can put paper to pencil on that one and figure something out.  Of course that would cut the bottom line for the for-profits and big pharm.  Do I care?  Not a bit.  

It's a beautiful day in the hood.  Y'all go plant something ~

Saturday, May 6, 2017

reaching out

That's another one of those politcally correct terms that gets wayyyy overused in the corporate world and gets on my nerves.  That being said I "reached out" to the governor and both senators of the State of Tennessee regarding the ACA repeal.  As this is a hot topic presently, both senators had generic emails waiting with which to reply with Corker's sounding a whole lot friendlier than Lamar's.  No word from Haslam yet but it is the weekend.  

My newest addiction is 13 Reasons Why.  It is masterfully crafted in a way that you never know which twist will take you on that turn.  Who among us has not asked "why" in the face of tragedy whe the truth is that the reasons are usually multiple.  I can sense the frustration not just of the teenagers but of the parents and teachers attempting to do their part to "fix" things.  When things get too heavy I just jump back into Grace and Frankie.

All is well here.  The little alien baby who shall be named Reaves is doing well and so is her mama.  We will share this Mother's day in some form or fashion even if by phone or card.  Heather and Joe are in town with AJ so I'm excited about meeting him too!

The sex count for lab grandbabies now stands at 2 and 2 all stairstepped to be born beginning in August.  Talk about some picture swapping!  

This is the day that the Lord has made ~

Friday, May 5, 2017

baby face

I got to meet my in-utero granddaughter today during Lauren's ultrasound.  She was quite active and moving hands and feet every which a way even at 9 ounces.  According to the doc and ultrasound lady everything was perfectly on track for where she is in the pregnancy.  After that we grubbed out at Rafferty's and I remembered how much I  miss eating there back when I had money.  Not that I had it today but by golly it was a celebration of Reaves girls and we had leftovers so there you go.  
It was storming in Jackson when I got up and cleared out of Dyersburg just as I was leaving.  The wind is pretty high so I fought with that all the way back on 412.  Turned out to be a gorgeous day though a bit nippy.  Sometime when I was occupied, Mamye left a tears.  She is heading to the vet clinic right now to have her old friend Tipper put down.  She's down to just two cats and both are elders.  I feel her pain just like she felt mine.  

The circle of life....ain't it amazing ?

a different wakeup

I dreamed heavily this morning and fought to come out of the fog of sleep at 830ish.  This old girl was tired.  I wandered to Sonic for breakfast and hit up the shady 'gentral before heading to the Lannom Center to help my friend set up.  I carried books and pictures and she hauled that table in like a warrior woman.  I then began my treatment which was sheer joy.  One woman who was scoping things out came by and asked "is she okay?" because I was laid out real still.  She and another guy made plans to come back by.  While I was there on the table Yaya came in with her stuff from Hexpol so we got to visit as well.  Score on the ink pen and tiny tape measure.

It makes me kind of proud to see so many businesses, many of them small and thriving in our area.  An expo like this is the perfect way to showcase what's good and up and coming in the community.  I watched one woman assemble this huge sign thing from metal parts that she carried in a bag.  Amazing. Abby and Cindy from French's were there delivering sweets to yet another booth.  Y'all run on out there. It's from 2-7.

Guess what? It's raining again.  

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

MFR tip of the day

My friend Gay is a myofascial release therapist who was trained by the physical therapist who invented the technique, John Barnes and she has traveled the world to do so.  Tomorrow at the Lannom Center the chamber of commerce will be hosting a small business expo.  Gay will be there giving samples of what she does best and will most certainly have her table up front and center.  The treatment consists of stretching the fascia that surrounds the whole body like a web.  When there is injury from trauma, repetitive motion or plain old stress the fascia contracts and causes pain, sometimes at a totally different site.  Five minute positional holds plus some arm pulling and a side of psoas and you're in business.  Insurance doesn't pay for this because as we know they're not about wellness.  So uh...what's up with all those PT clinics??  Y'all go see what the whole thing is about.  Tomorrow from 2-7.  I'm sure there will be a lot of cute jewelry too plus the fabulous folks from The Mill Workspace.  Maybe I can pick up a new ink pen or two ;) 

I ran into Sophie's daddy's keeper at work and he offered his condolences for our loss.  Only animal lovers truly get that pain.  They are so loyal and compassionate.  He has Maggie and Chester, father and daughter and his son has a black lab and golden retriever named Reece.  How perfect for that family.

Honor thy father and thy mother ^j^

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

dream on

I had barely gotten in the door at work today when Yaya called and told me about her dreams in very vivid detail.  Her voice cracked as she described she and Gaga going to a wedding and her doing the honors of escorting that exceptional old woman.  She said they laughed and hugged and squeezed and it was glorious.  Next was her friend Judy and then they all ended up at Miss Ann's house for some odd reason.  Out there at Lakewood where they have to die for oak leaf hydrangeas.  I'm trying not to cry early in the day because you feel like crap but that almost got me.  All I could do was say thanks for sharing that with me.  She and her family are like my own.  

I ran into another old friend at the chicken store and we talked photography a bit.  That was after a snack stop at the 'gentral.  I seriously avoid Lake Rd and 51 if I can.  Which is, of course, where Kroger is.  And everything other food joint you can think of.  I did business with the lovely ATT lady in a cubicle shared by Domino's.  Little storefronts.  

The day Van Hinson lost The Plaza that was the end of my convenient eating.  His meats were to die for and he had all the other staples including brooms and beer.  He and Kenny were always around to hand cut.  He gave credit to tons of folks like me and at the time of the flood I was paid in full.  Shady Kroger shut down before that.  Food desert!

Here's a business idea for any of you who might own a property that could be used for a small grocery store on Highway 51 would be used like heck especially if it has a fresh and organic section.  It can't be in Southtown proper because that still floods.  The big one even took over all the way past Clark Distributing.  That was a headwater that began with 11 inches in Nashvegas.

For the life of me I can't remember the name of that little corner of Lauderdale where the Forked Deer and Obion merge into the Big Muddy.  I used to go riding out that way all the time learning the backroads with my buddy.  I remember standing on a hill at highway 88 and thinking "there goes Chisholm".  We watched people in boats out exploring.  Kind of like a redneck Waterworld.  

I have always known that the father of the man my Daddy worked for drowned while crossing a frozen Reelfoot Lake in 1918.  My brother told me that his buddy remembers his grandma telling tales about HER folks finding and recovering his body.  I'm intrigued, to say the least.

Stay tuned for for more chatter ~

Monday, May 1, 2017

i give

I don't know what it is in me that thinks I can make a difference in the whole scheme of things.  I've always been that way...if I believe in something strongly I hang on like a dog with a bone.  That's just another way that I punish myself by thinking that I have any control over ANYTHING.  My friend Sondra scooped me up at Patterson Brothers this morning for work and dropped me off where they had put on new tires and fixed the door handle inside and out with the parts I bought from the salvage yard.  It's been years since I've had an outside handle.  What a luxury!  Not to mention the fact that I can also open from the inside and not crawl out the passenger side.  God is good....all the time.

When I look at how appreciative folks can be for small miracles and then hear the back biting and complaining that is the rest of the world I just shake my head.  All things are relative when it comes to being grateful.  If you're rich with money, having more does nothing much but feed the greed.  When you don't have enough, life is a struggle.  I'm smack in the middle where I live check to check as a single woman.  I always have something to eat.  I have a job.  That's more than what a lot of folks can say.  

I think that having a vocation where you are appreciated and valued is a big plus in the happiness department.  I've had it both ways in my career and have survived thus far.  Somebody asked me today when I'm gonna' "give it up."  I just gave her a wan smile and said "I can't".  But maybe....just maybe.  

I think I can ~

Sunday, April 30, 2017

frog legs

If you are into that sort of thing for sport or dining, today would be an excellent day for gigging due to heavy HEAVY rain that included not one but two tornado warnings.  The first was around 2:15 AM and my phone went off with the local warning which is a very nice perk.  We made it through okay but Lorna got slammed in Tiptonville where she lost the top of her barn and several pecan trees in her orchard due to straight line wind.  She said they were snapped at the ground....100 year old trees.  The bottom of the lane is covered and at one point I thought the (not so) trusty Camry wouldn't make it but by golly she did.  After round 2 passed I needed to make a run to the chicken store and found that I had left the window open on the passenger side so back in the house for a blanket and towels.  I still ended up in the store with a wet butt.  

My house sits high up on a hill that overlooks the farm and all the water drains down to the end of the lane.  When it's too much too fast, there you go.  That low spot is also notorious for getting covered when the Forked Deer river floods and it probably will in the days to come.  I have a full basement which would seem like a safe place to be but my biggest fear is the house collapsing on top of it with me down there so I stay upstairs even when the sirens wail.  I suppose the little hall would be my safe zone.  It's dead center of this old house.  

Once upon a time my brother and sister in law were reporters for stations in Memphis.  BG and I were chilling and carrying on when I got a phone call from him saying there was a tornado headed straight for us.  It spared this house and hit about a mile up the road at a motel killing somebody there.  That entire week was all about severe weather and the culvert under my road ended up collapsing.  I moved to town for several days and Daddy carried me back and forth across the field in his truck to get to where I was going.  Tommy and Yvette had a Jeep and that's how they got back and forth in the mud.  We had made quite a trail by the time that week was up .  It was the first week of May, I do believe.  The area this side of the Big Muddy is notorious for getting slammed during weather events.  

Friday I'm going with BG for an ultrasound which should definitely tell the tale on whether Reaves is a girl or boy.  Whatever he or she is, they already have several gifts in the wings.  

Stay dry and turn around.  Don't drown~

Saturday, April 29, 2017

a day off

It's so humid here that I worked up a sweat just crawling out of the passenger side at the 'gentral.  And then again at Pennington's.  I have to visit there in spurts because I would spend the gas money on their product if I'm not careful.  Today I got to see Stanley and Steve again and I startled Stanley's dog when I tried to smooch her through the window.  She got chastised for barking and then we had a meet and greet.  Beautiful fur baby!  

I got home and unloaded the compost and a pepper plant plus a few flowers.  Squash seeds have been poked into the bed.  By then I was drenched so had to come in and chill a bit.  Us southern ladies don't do heat and humidity well even if we are farmer's daughters.  

There was a lizard sighting at the chicken store and they were all still kind of freaked out when I stopped there.  I spotted a woman who looked mighty familiar and asked her name.  Turns out it was long lost cousin Lisa!  Our fathers were first cousins and her sister is a lab person too for the CDC.  We exchanged phone numbers with a promise to share the family history which sits all OVER my house in boxes.  Roots and ancestry were a passion for both of my parents.  See you soon Sandra!

Love the one you're with ~

Friday, April 28, 2017

crossed wires

At some point in time when there was probably beer involved i managed to start a new FB account and found my way back out of it somehow to my original home.  When I fired up a new tablet and downloaded the app, that old one came back to haunt me.  The last two blog posts were posted on that old site and you can sure tell it with the difference in stats.  We'll see if I got it straight.  When it first happened everybody thought that I'd been hacked but in reality I had just made a major dumbass move.  

I'm so glad it's Friday I could literally cry but I won't because I've had enough of that lately.  All I want to do is sleep in and wear pajamas.  Yard guys came today and it looks spectacular as usual.  That finger that got dislocated months ago hasn't given me much trouble at all even though the joint is huge.  This morning when I woke I could barely bend it!  Must be the front moving in.  

I'm happy to hear that there's a possibility the government won't be shut down in the next week because of Trumpy's wall. That is the most idiotic thing he's pitched so far, well....among others like repeal of the ACA with no backup plan.  Why is it so hard for this administration to be pro-active rather than reactive?  Never mind.  We all know the answer and the house of cards is about to fall.  Heh.  

So, the new tires will be put on Monday and I've got a door handle whenever Punkin gets around to that job.  Crawling out the passenger side door is getting old, just saying.  I will feel much better about traveling when all that is done.  

Over and out from the hill ~

Thursday, April 27, 2017


If you've seen a medical professional in the past few years you have signed a piece of paper stating that you understand that your health information will be kept safe by the provider.  It is the law and fines for violation are not cheap.  Corporate drill always includes many lessons on privacy and compliance.  That's so if somebody gets pissed off that you put their stuff on facebook or twitter, they're covered.  I've always been respectful enough to delete any signage from my workplace in photos and I don't tweet so there you go.  

I spent most of the day in my home away from home wearing pounds of lead.  There was Subway and CAKE!!  Thanks to CEB for that treat.  I need new tennis shoes and scrambled to find some with laces this morning.  I ended up with the muddy old nikes I was wearing when I dug Sophie's grave.  And by golly?  I wore 'em proud.

Keep the faith ~

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

beware the rays

Being a very fair skinned lady I've had many a terrible blistering sunburn over the years.  Never used sunscreen except in later life...always trying to get a little color.  Mostly all I got was freckles.  I am beginning to pay for that now in the form of squamous cell carcinoma in-situ meaning a minor skin cancer on my arm.  Two lesions were biopsied and one was just a nuisance.  The SC will be treated by cryo after it heals for a month.  Kim has had her eyes and hands on my skin for years.  She was a phlebotomist when we were first met and went on to become a PA with a nice job and great family.  Her doc and I worked together even BEFORE then when he had a rural health clinic.  He hates whoever was governor then to this day because he cut off funding.  

We ate free not once but twice today on lab week wednesday.  It was busy as a cat scratching in litter so we just rode it out and played nice.  I'm sure numerous lives were saved in the process.  Here's the thing y'all:  Medicine can only do so much.  A focus on wellness is much healthier in the long run.  Those pharmacy generics that you gobble down can also kill you.  Exercise is the most important, I think.  I've always been a walker and even now I find it hard to sit still.  I do bad things to my body but I also focus on alternative medicine like essential oils and natural food.  After three days without aspartame I can honestly say I feel less toxic.  

I went back to the scrap yard today where my parts were ready and I've got a friend lined up to fix it this weekend.  All is well in my world.  BG has a brand new phone on the way and I imagine she's gonna go apeshit crazy after sitting there for 24 hours with a dead one.  Once again, thank you Lisa Ward and ATT Dyersburg.  

I'm binging on Saul right now and loving Mike being alive.  I've seen a couple of others and can't wait for more.  Kathy Bates has one launching soon that looks so like me I could LOL.  Like it or not bible thumpers, cannabis is already an industry and will become much more so because it makes money which the states badly need.  It would help with the wellness piece and for those with chronic disease.  It treats the cause, which is a cellular imbalance from chemicals in the environment, genetics and stress.  

So how about it Tennessee?  Let's grow our own!!!

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

today's dilemma

I was headed to the car when i spotted the trunk open and the garbage hanging out where I failed to take it to the road yesterday afternoon.  Since there's a light in there I was sure it would be dead as a doornail but to my surprise it started right up.  Thank you Jesus!  I then pulled up to the roadside bin and reached for the handle to get out and do the deed when the sucker broke off in my hand.  Soooooo I was forced to crawl out of the passenger side and empty the garbage.  I can get IN even though the handle itself is broken off because I know how to do it.  It's that way on both sides up front.  Now, I can't get OUT without the climb which is a bitch for an old woman like me.  I called a salvage yard, found the parts and when I showed up to get them the guy said he didn't have it he would have to go " take it off".  *sigh*  Promised he'd have it by tomorrow morning.  Just for kicks I drove by Patterson Brothers to see what's up with the tire situation and they said when I get the door handle parts they can do that at the same time they install and balance the tires.  That is WHEN the part comes for their balancer.  *shit*.  The car is 16 years old and falling apart.  Talk about your lack of mobility.  This is not a good thing with a grandchild on the way in another town.  

That being said, I read today that my artist friend Mary totaled her vehicle and is looking for one as well.  I'm not sure what happened but she seemed pretty grateful to be alive.  I should be too, so I choose to see it that way.  I know .... Pollyanna to the bone.  

I honestly feel like I'm in the desert.  There are so many wonderful things in my life to be grateful for and I am.  It's just the weariness that comes with having to put out fires and climb hills  This is lab week so we're eating free lunch all week and we munched out on Chick Fil A today.  Matt seriously loves us and the feeling is mutual.  Marfy made my day with her intention to stay around a little longer so there's that blessing too.

Mommy needs a vacay~

Monday, April 24, 2017

almost a nurse

I've been a lab tech/phlebotomist for almost 40 years now.  I never had to do an EKG or ABG but that was the lab's responsibility before RT came to be.  If you know what all these terms mean, plus STAT then you're almost a nurse like me.  Or else you watch a lot of Code Black.  When I hired on the lab was still doing titrations on stomach acid with invasive tube like procedures and I said hell no I did not go to college for this.  

I've seen an assistant pathologist cut a guy open with a saw and a cig hanging out of his mouth.  That was back in the days of Dr. Inclan and Betty Rothrock.  The morgue was not a fun place however it's where I learned never to eat liver and why not to have an autopsy unless foul play is suspected.  If that's the case?  Let the pros do it.

The primary focus of my career has been on treatment and testing in the Blood Bank.  That includes inventory management and policy and a good bit of training and phone answering.  Everybody wants what they want and they want it now.  We help each other out in a crisis usually in a professional manner that requires just a nod or a look.  As a team....meaning all departments....we save lives and do good things.  There are bad outcomes on most any day because the people are sick or they wouldn't be there.  There's a huge dilemma with somebody's number being up and lack of empathy for a sick person.  I've seen all facets of it and you are fortunate to have somebody who cares at the bedside.

My eyes were swollen shut again today after yesterday's meltdown.  I'm glad she's not sick anymore.  Same for my parents and all the people I've loved and lost.  I got not one but two hugs from Dodo today which was a nice way to start lab week along with free!food!   Sam and Oscar are sticking close to me making sure that we're still a tribe even without Sophie.  Not sure where Lily is but you know cats.  

My friend Sue is at the beach freezing to death but I bet it's warmed up by now. Don't forget my sand girlfriend.  


Sunday, April 23, 2017

the rainbow bridge

I'm not sure if that's a legend or a truth but I honestly believe that's how those that we love cross over to the light.  Sophie went there early this morning on my bed which was her favorite spot.  Sam and Oscar wanted out at daylight so I got up to open the front door and as Sam passed me I heard a big gassy sound and knew for sure he had just farted right in my face.  I went on into the bathroom and returned to find Sophie passed on.  That was the sound and the smell and I've been there before.  I picked her up and put her lifeless body on the floor next to the bed and immediately called for help from my grave digging friends and neighbors.  Then I started digging with my brand new shovel.  

Bev and Patrick and Mamye all showed up with theirs and we got the hole done deep enough to cover and top with a straw bale.  There will be something growing over her body soon like a tomato or something.  It needs a few more bricks to keep the digger critters out.  Ethel's yellow iris are blooming so there's your flowers for a proper burial.  By the way, Daddy's peonies are ready to bust wide open.  

Keep the faith ^j^

Saturday, April 22, 2017

best laid plans

We had it all worked out for the weekend trip home except it didn't happen because of numerous things like weather and my mental state following yesterday's drama.  Like BG said, it just wasn't meant to be.  I came home to find Sophie firmly entrenched under the porch and I had to crawl in there and flush her out.  As much as I'm scared of mr snake, y'all know I love that dog a lot.  She managed to make it up the steps and into the house where she spent the night on blankets.  Then this morning, out she went wobbling down the steps to lay in the rain.  I had a lot going on but managed to get some gatorade and syringes to try and get some lytes in her.  I picked her 60 pound self up and carried her up the steps to my room where she is currently chilling on the bed.  If she's not better by Monday, it's time for the vet.  

BGs ohone is a piece of crap so I upgraded at the local ATT store with a delightful lady named Lisa who truly knows her stuff.  While I was there various confused people came in with questions for she and her co-worker.  By that time I had missed lunch with my girlfriends so I just headed on home for the day.  It's blackberry winter you know.  Following days of rain the temps are running in the fifties.  Jim always appreciates the weather report, right?

I'll keep y'all updated on the sick puppy situation.  She's so incredibly sweet that it makes me sad to see her so lethargic.  Either she was poisoned or got into something bad but she's still wagging her tail so there's that.  

Peace and love ~

Friday, April 21, 2017

life is hard

Probably the most important book I've ever read is The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck.  That phrase is the first sentence of that book and a solid truth around which all the rest of his hypothesis is built.  We rail against injustice in numerous ways that are acted out in our daily lives when, in fact, if we TRULY grasp the fact that life is indeed hard, controlling behavior can be a distant memory.  It's not just you's hard for everybody.  People we love die or move away.  Jobs end. Marriages fail.  Trust is broken.  It happens every day and very often to those who deserve it least.  

This is when big girl panties come into play.  I started trying to put mine on when I went to therapy in my 30s and it's been a rocky road ever since. least it's interesting.  As a healthcare provider I'm one of those who truly does want to "help people".  Most of us start out that way but time and experience often result in burnout particularly when money is involved.  As a strong advocate for the patient it really bothers me to observe practitioners who just don't care about anything but the buck.  

The shopping for Reaves continues and cousin Sandy has done an order at Carter's that will be full of treasures I'm sure.  She also brought me the latest addition to my beach sand collection, this time from Panama City.  Plus a Dove peanut butter egg.  Who loves me right?  

I'm frazzled and worn out with the details of trying to keep my world twirling.  I guess I should pull that book out and read it again, huh?

Let it go ~ 

Thursday, April 20, 2017

dog gone

The hottest front page story in our local news has been about an asshat who shoots dogs that come on his property.  He has kinda' sorta' free range chickens and just hates it when the puppies start digging.  He was warned several years ago after killing several pets to ceaseand desist.  This time, he did the deed and transported the bodies to the side of 51 North around Trimble.  They were labs and somebody's babies.  

Speaking of which, Sophie is MIA.  She's always on my bed except for short potty breaks and I remember letting the whole pack out yesterday morning at dawn.  Sam and Oscar were here to greet me after work.  I did what I do and carried on and didn't even notice she wasn't in her usual cuddling spot.  When I came home and she still wasn't here, I started driving the 'hood and calling around.  If I had a dime for every time Faith did that I'd be in Fiji but Sophie just isn't built that way.  She's a homebody and a baby girl.  Three years old with soulful eyes likeher grandmas.  

The rain started as soon as I headed down Samaria Bend and Clara was behind me going to check on her girls.  Driving back east I noticed Daddy's white peonies blooming so I stopped to pick some.  The crimson ones should be ready by mother's day. 

As luck would have it my tire folks need a part for their installer balancer thingy so I can't get new tread for the weekend of BG transport.  So...onto plan B whatever that is.  It's totally out of my hands.  

Peace. Be. Still ~

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

count zubrovka

"You should blog" he said.  "What's that, I asked."  At that point JL Yarbro proceeded to explain to me what a weblog was and how it was a vehicle for writers and photographers like myself.  Thousands of posts later, I come here to pay homage to my old and dear friend who was one of a kind.  

John lived with his parents Big John and Cissy next door to my grandparents Gaga and Pawpaw so we were constant companions as children.  We grew up attending FUMC together.  We followed each other to graduation from DHS and beyond as fellow hippies and soulmates.  My grandmother told mom about Miss Cissy coming over all freaked out over Little John being sick with a fever as a small child.  My grandfather died when John and I were three, leaving Gaga in that house on College Hill alone.  

John was married before, but Jana is the love of his lifetime.  I came to know her through him and she accepted his hard headed ways with some trepidation but always tolerance.  He was an artist and musician as well.  I remember a period when he would scout graveyards and take mesmerizing black and white photos of the stones that told life stories of the generations.  He recognized that I had a gift for photography and gave me what will forevermore be known as the badass Leica.  Back in 1995 he probably paid 2K for it and it was state of the art.  He delivered it to me in a bag complete with all the supplies I needed including cards and lenses.  I had a ball with it for years until I left it in the rain one day.  I think the camera itself still works, but the cable doesn't.  

Fast forward a few years and he contacted me about a gift of his parents' 95 white Cadillac Seville with less than 100K miles on it.  It was a money pit....always something going wrong and costing an arm and a leg to fix but we loved it.  He thought my parents would enjoy riding to church in it, and they did.  That car is still sitting in my front yard here on the lane and hasn't moved in a year.  It's a classic, for sure.  

That kind of generous heart is something that has always meant a lot to me.  He could have sold that camera and that car and pocketed the money but instead he chose to enrich my life.  My heart breaks for all of us who loved him.  Like Chucky said " See you on the other side buddy."

Spirit in the Sky ~

Tuesday, April 18, 2017


Oh my lord, I forgot to take my allergy pill today ( and all the rest of them ) and I've been sneezing and itching and all kinds of allergic responses.  I thought about asking for a shot of Decadron at the derm guy's place yesterday but we were too busy cutting off suspicious lesions and talking about the past.  I get my sutures out on Monday fo' free because it's a surgical follow up.  I like that value added piece.

I had a long chat with Heather today while AJ was napping and then another one with BG while she was being treated to a pedicure.  Mamye and Hippie are at Taco Tuesday so all is well I suppose.  The driver's side door handle on the INSIDE is now broken which is a conumdrum what with no outside handles on either front door.  Y'all shop some scrap yards for me and holla.  

Tristina the beautiful called today to say that she has a gorgeous cherry changing table for Reaves with bedding and all.  It takes a village.  My nickname at work now is Sugartot because I totally put the sugar all over my tater tots one day.  It's our little village and sometimes we get confused, right Little Bit?

Monday, April 17, 2017

puffy eyes and a hailstorm

My eyes were almost swollen shut when I rolled out of bed at 10AM from all that crying yesterday.  That put me with little time to make my appointment with old friends.  Kent and Kim are both old friends and previous co-workers.  When he and Laura moved back this way from San Diego, I was probably the first friend they met, at church no less.  Their daughter Melissa and BG became close friends and grew up together.  She works there too so it was a pleasure to catch up with the whole bunch.  I had two skin biopsies that are itching like crazy about now.  

It was raining when I left there to visit the ATT store for an upgrade.  There are no contracts now!  That's because you pay for the phone as you go instead of shelling out 600 bucks up front.  Anyway, it can't happen until the bill is paid which will be on Friday so there's that to take care of on Saturday while Lauren is here.  About the time I left that store all hell broke loose with the weather.  I could barely see my way down Mall Blvd and when I hit Parr the hail started.  That's when I said to hell with it and pulled over while it pinged.  After about five minutes I was able to proceed only to get the windshield so fogged up that another pullover was required to even see out the windshield.  There's another wave in progress right now.  Heads up West Tennessee.


Sunday, April 16, 2017

in waves

What started as a little bit of sadness yesterday turned into a full fledged grief storm this morning and the waves keep crashing over me every hour or so.  I'm not real sure what it's all about but it's probably related to that rainbow the other evening.  I read my horoscope a lot of days and yesterday it mentioned not writing off a relationship from the past.  Someone could reappear.  

I'll be damned if that someone didn't turn out to be Mackie knocking on the front door following a day on the golf course with his buddy.  He almost died a few months ago from diabetes and heart blockages so it was kind of like seeing a ghost!  We talked about where we left off and how, and made peace with it.  It was good to catch up.

The flowering cross at the corner of Main and McGaughey was already kind of droopy when I headed home due to temps in the 80s.  It was a solid stand of magnolia leaves when I passed by in the dark this morning.  Now it's covered in blooms.  What a beautiful tradition.  My mother told me tales of sunrise services in that church with little old ladies including my great grandmother bringing their birds in to sing as the morning broke.  Ethel had canaries and a parakeet perhaps.  They lived in cages in her dining room on Pate street which I can still picture in my mind.  

Mamye is on the way over since I'm in crisis and plus she needs to get out of the house.  It's a win-win.  Tomorrow is supposed to be a rainy one which the tiny garden will enjoy.  I've yet to tackle those weeds with vinegar but I'll get around it.  Then some more compost.  Keep that nitrogen going, dontcha' know.

Bless are the poor in spirit ~

Saturday, April 15, 2017

my get up and go

Pretty much it has got up and went.  I keep waiting for that day when I feel like doing something after work and instead find that those days are sort of gone.  With age comes a decrease in stamina.  Both of my parents were retired and having fun at my current age.  Mom slept for six months after she quit just to recover from sheer exhaustion.  They were blessed to have the means to do that with his long career at the USDA paying them about what I make now until they died.  I try not to think too much about the future because I can't envision ever doing anything but working and getting up to do it again.  I'm patiently waiting for the universe to present me with a perfect opportunity which I will LEAP at when I see it.  If I'm able to leap, that is!

A day without some kind of ache or pain is a rarity and a blessing.  One of my co-workers is breast feeding her latest baby boy and I'm learning all about the pump thing and keeping the supply going.  I opted out on that 32 years ago.  I hear that formula is now super expensive just like all things these days.  Ditto for diapers.  One day at a time, as they say.  My friend Cathy has a bathtub that she's handing down to Reaves.

My mother was the queen of holiday festivities and would be ashamed that I don't have Easter bunnies and eggs everywhere.  Our most memorable Easter Sunday was the one where I forgot to take off my pajama pants and we got to church with me wearing bloomers under the frilly dress.  Mortified!  Then there was the one about ten years ago when she had wreck #2 on the way to Easter service and ended up in the ER while I was working.  She got sued on that one and, yes....I still have the legal papers somewhere because she saved everything.  She and Daddy were secret hoarders.  

I'm melancholy and not really sure why.  Some of it may be fatigue and stress but parts of  me are still grieving.  It's been two years since all the dying started and one year since BG left the nest.  There's been a lot of water under the bridge, so to speak.  

That being said, it's just a valley as the Little General would say.  Peaks always come back around.  

Faith ~  

Friday, April 14, 2017

good friday musings

Well, here we are on the day after the mother of all betrayals. According to the good book sometime in the afternoon Jesus Christ was crucified on a cross after being scorned and whipped while carrying said cross.  The people turned him over for this sentence when the big guy left the decision up to them.  "Father, why have you forsaken me?"  The rest is history.  A young Jewish carpenter born of a virgin birth went on to perform miracles galore with a lesson in each one.  Love thy neighbor, for example.  "But who is my neighbor?"  they asked.  

I've been on the phone all afternoon with BG planning our comings and goings for the next week.  She's coming home so I have to clean or she'll do it for me.  What we need is to bond.  

Please stay out and about at the Easter egg hunt tomorrow and don't come to the ER.  I will be there and am enjoying the quiet spell.  That is all ~

Thursday, April 13, 2017

day trippin'

Lorna called this morning with an offer to ride along with her to Lake county so off we went.  I wandered around her yard in wonder at all the work she's done with her straw bale garden.  While I have four bales  and a couple of ground beds, she has FIFTY bales laid out in her huge yard at Silvertop,  Some had strawberries in already.  We talked about the multi-million dollar highway to nowhere that runs by her place and was built because of the port.  Reminds me of the Lake Road extension that leads right up to the front door of Colonial Rubber.  It sees a lot more traffic than the one in Tiptonville.  We drove by her homeplace and chatted about who lives where....memory lane stuff.  At 65, she is raising two grandchildren.  

We had talked about lunch at Boyette's but decided that was too heavy and settled on The Bus Stop in downtown Dyersburg.  It's an upscale bistro type place that was put into our ACTUAL old Greyhound station.  The food is to die for prepared by a talented chef named Eric.  Lorna promised to hook him up with fresh produce when it comes in and he was thrilled.  

Then we headed to Pecan Lane where she inspected my little plot and said I was on course as a novice organic gardener.  The beauty of it is that you can many seasons of growth from an initial investment time and work but not much money.  My next step is to get at the periphery with white vinegar spray to get rid of the grass.  She and I are kindred spirits, smart savvy southern gals who hold nothing back.  We are cheerleaders for each other and our families and I love hearing about her world travels.  I'm talking Himalayan and everything.  On her dining room table are examples of tribal masks that she made.  Like me, she sorts a lot.  We have things that are of value to us and nobody can quite understand how hard it is to discard anything that has always been around.  

Today is Maundy Thursday ( thanks Beth ) which brings to mind the last supper and foot washing.  What a servant leader! I can really relate to those disciples in that I have denied many times in life what is good and true.  I imagine the Pharisees and Saducees as precursors to Trump.  

It's a beautiful day in the hood.  Go forth and enjoy ~