You could literally feel the mood at work today shifting into holiday mode because we only saw the really sick ones. The cafeteria is closed for FIVE days so we had to scrounge for something to eat. We tend to always have things stashed in the locker or frig so we won't starve. The ones I feel sorry for are the patient's family members who are camped out there. Stopped by to drop off some OJ for Daddy and ended up watching my mama cry again. The short version is that I felt her pain and told her to put on her big girl panties. Yeah, ya'll believe that one??
We are scattered and working just like most other families so we gather on whatever day works and blend the seasons, so to speak. For instance, I bought a Christmas tree during lunch today. I've never in my life bought one before it was almost time to take it down. This holiday season will be different.
I sat outside and watched the sunset, snapping pictures and slapping Sam on the nose when he jumped on me. Faith rolled in the leaves like a kid. She's really been missing Butterbean, like the rest of the household. The sometimes on again off again roommate had to take Sam out and explain to him what happened. Faith knows...she was there with us. Only Lily came out of the whole thing feeling like the queen B that she is. That's more attention for her kitty self.
I have three days off this weekend and you can put your money on the fact that my black friday won't be spent at department stores. The Dollar General will do just fine. Ya'll be careful out there amongst the masses. It can get violent!
I'm leaving room for the Spirit to work. Hope you do the same ^j^
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
bucksnort
Anybody who has traveled the state of Tennessee very much knows that it's a famous exit in the middle of the state. Famous because it's one of the few and far between places to stop and pee around the Tennessee River area. Loretta's dude ranch is somewhere close around there too. I've never been...but then I've never been to Graceland either and I lived in Memphis for several years. Let's just say I'd rather visit somebody's shrine that I REALLY adore..like Jackson Browne or The Eagles.
Seeing deer around here is not uncommon but usually it's the babies and mamas out prancing. The other day I saw this dude with a huge rack standing in the bean field by my road and I slowed down to take it all in. He stared me down for a few minutes, then went on over across to the thicket by the river where they hang out and party. I can't help it ya'll...that's freaking amazing to a nature girl.
Still gray and misty here on the hill. I made a big time grocery store run this afternoon and it was a nightmare. They're installing a new "fuel center" which cuts the parking lot in half. Not to fear kids...I managed to snag what we need for a Thanksgiving day after feast. Sometimes you just play the cards you're dealt ;)
There are several old CDs lying out here on the desk, waiting to remind me where I've been during the past few years. If I didn't write it down or burn it, don't ask. I've slept since then.
Ya'll have a very happy holiday time, whenever you choose to celebrate with family and friends. That's what it's all about. That and keeping the faith.
^j^
Seeing deer around here is not uncommon but usually it's the babies and mamas out prancing. The other day I saw this dude with a huge rack standing in the bean field by my road and I slowed down to take it all in. He stared me down for a few minutes, then went on over across to the thicket by the river where they hang out and party. I can't help it ya'll...that's freaking amazing to a nature girl.
Still gray and misty here on the hill. I made a big time grocery store run this afternoon and it was a nightmare. They're installing a new "fuel center" which cuts the parking lot in half. Not to fear kids...I managed to snag what we need for a Thanksgiving day after feast. Sometimes you just play the cards you're dealt ;)
There are several old CDs lying out here on the desk, waiting to remind me where I've been during the past few years. If I didn't write it down or burn it, don't ask. I've slept since then.
Ya'll have a very happy holiday time, whenever you choose to celebrate with family and friends. That's what it's all about. That and keeping the faith.
^j^
Monday, November 23, 2009
notes to self
Written on a rainy dreary misty Monday afternoon following an exhausting couple of weeks:
Never EVER run out of Celexa again. A couple of days that feel pretty okay will be followed by an extreme need to slam pots on the tile counter and break into the ugly cry.
***************************************************
Always remember to take ownership of your own issues and do not, by any means, let other people try to project dump theirs on you. There is a line drawn in the sand that one occasionally gets weak and forgets, especially when it comes to memebers of the opposite sex for which one has a soft spot. People don't change their basic character traits unless they want to do so themselves. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
****************************************************
Generation X is a whole different ball game from the Baby Boomer deal. Most have never known the type of responsibility that we assumed at quite an early age. Many of them, even the ones who didn't "have it made", feel entitled, just because. As parents and grandparents we have shielded them from real life to the point that many have a very erratic work ethic and others just simply don't know how to deal with the realities of day to day life. Thank goodness, my daughter is not one of them. Well, maybe just a little bit :)
****************************************************
True inequality and/or persecution based on race, gender or creed is wrong and illegal. This does not give you the right to scream "foul" and lawyer up every time something doesn't go your way. Call your mother instead. She'll probably tell you it's all their fault and you're her baby. It's much cheaper, and just as effective. See above: big girl panties
****************************************************
A pet can be your best friend and there are way too many without homes or loving keepers. Support the local no-kill animal shelters or start one if there is a need. Hey...I've learned from experience that there's somebody for everybody out there and that includes the animal kingdom and people.
****************************************************
Somebody once said "Home is where, when you go, they have to take you in." I've got to admit that I've had many homes besides the one that I live in, especially during dark times when the ugly cry busts smooth out of nowhere. I almost got fired one time for crying during a high level very intense hospital meeting because a teenage obnoxious BG and myself had just had it out on the phone before I walked into the boardroom. Notice I said "almost." Still there, after 32 years and I adore the family. There are tons of dedicated compassionate healthcare workers who never once win employee of the month/day/year.
****************************************************
November and February are very dreary months, but this too shall pass.
****************************************************
Art, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Something that looks like a piece of crap to one person is a precious gift to someone else. That's why they make strawberry and vanilla. And Moose Tracks! The expression of oneself in that art is the important thing, whether it be music, photography, cooking or canoe carving.
****************************************************
Friendship waxes and wanes over the years, sustained by periods of closeness that compel us to stay in touch even when life gets crazy...and perhaps especially so during those times. I couldn't tell you my best friend if my life depended on it because I've got way to many to count. We just seem to keep finding each other over and over again during the course of the journey. I love it when that happens.
*****************************************************
Leaving room for the spirit to work is the only sane way to live because, hey. It's a big job taking care of the entire world and this old gal is way too lazy to tackle it. I'd rather spend my time playing with the dogs or walking the yard with a beer. Or both!
*****************************************************
"No matter where you go, there you are." Mary Engelbreit
Never EVER run out of Celexa again. A couple of days that feel pretty okay will be followed by an extreme need to slam pots on the tile counter and break into the ugly cry.
***************************************************
Always remember to take ownership of your own issues and do not, by any means, let other people try to
****************************************************
Generation X is a whole different ball game from the Baby Boomer deal. Most have never known the type of responsibility that we assumed at quite an early age. Many of them, even the ones who didn't "have it made", feel entitled, just because. As parents and grandparents we have shielded them from real life to the point that many have a very erratic work ethic and others just simply don't know how to deal with the realities of day to day life. Thank goodness, my daughter is not one of them. Well, maybe just a little bit :)
****************************************************
True inequality and/or persecution based on race, gender or creed is wrong and illegal. This does not give you the right to scream "foul" and lawyer up every time something doesn't go your way. Call your mother instead. She'll probably tell you it's all their fault and you're her baby. It's much cheaper, and just as effective. See above: big girl panties
****************************************************
A pet can be your best friend and there are way too many without homes or loving keepers. Support the local no-kill animal shelters or start one if there is a need. Hey...I've learned from experience that there's somebody for everybody out there and that includes the animal kingdom and people.
****************************************************
Somebody once said "Home is where, when you go, they have to take you in." I've got to admit that I've had many homes besides the one that I live in, especially during dark times when the ugly cry busts smooth out of nowhere. I almost got fired one time for crying during a high level very intense hospital meeting because a teenage obnoxious BG and myself had just had it out on the phone before I walked into the boardroom. Notice I said "almost." Still there, after 32 years and I adore the family. There are tons of dedicated compassionate healthcare workers who never once win employee of the month/day/year.
****************************************************
November and February are very dreary months, but this too shall pass.
****************************************************
Art, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Something that looks like a piece of crap to one person is a precious gift to someone else. That's why they make strawberry and vanilla. And Moose Tracks! The expression of oneself in that art is the important thing, whether it be music, photography, cooking or canoe carving.
****************************************************
Friendship waxes and wanes over the years, sustained by periods of closeness that compel us to stay in touch even when life gets crazy...and perhaps especially so during those times. I couldn't tell you my best friend if my life depended on it because I've got way to many to count. We just seem to keep finding each other over and over again during the course of the journey. I love it when that happens.
*****************************************************
Leaving room for the spirit to work is the only sane way to live because, hey. It's a big job taking care of the entire world and this old gal is way too lazy to tackle it. I'd rather spend my time playing with the dogs or walking the yard with a beer. Or both!
*****************************************************
"No matter where you go, there you are." Mary Engelbreit
Saturday, November 21, 2009
in spite of ourselves
I don't know how it happened, but suddenly my mother turned 76 and I turned 54 and BG got to be twenty five. We're all still in the village, thank goodness. Today we celebrated her birthday down at the log cabin that was built in the 30's. As the story goes, it was a hunting lodge for the Ferguson family back in the day. There was this big old cottonwood tree that stood guard over the cabin while me and brothers were growing up there. It died a few years ago and had to be cut down. Fortunately there was another little tree that wrapped its' branches all crooked like up and around the trunk of that ancient cottonwood. Pardon me for not knowing the name of it. I'll have to ask Daddy tomorrow after breakfast at Mel's.
A good time was had by all at the girl party. We ate fattening stuff for lunch and drank fruit tea. Me and Yaya even managed to sneak out to the patio for some state of the union chat. The blended history within the group that showed up at our log cabin today would fill an entire shelf at the local library.
I'm considering a restful night's sleep on the couch because it's early and I'm tickled to death to be at home with Sam and Faith, listening to my kids discuss things rationally in the kitchen. As much as I hate drama, this is the closest thing to heaven for a smartass country gal who is an asparagus and tomato farmer. And terrified of snakes! There was a six month period where that wore out faded couch was my bed. What the HELL was I thinking?
A good time was had by all at the girl party. We ate fattening stuff for lunch and drank fruit tea. Me and Yaya even managed to sneak out to the patio for some state of the union chat. The blended history within the group that showed up at our log cabin today would fill an entire shelf at the local library.
I'm considering a restful night's sleep on the couch because it's early and I'm tickled to death to be at home with Sam and Faith, listening to my kids discuss things rationally in the kitchen. As much as I hate drama, this is the closest thing to heaven for a smartass country gal who is an asparagus and tomato farmer. And terrified of snakes! There was a six month period where that wore out faded couch was my bed. What the HELL was I thinking?
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Willa
I couldn't tell you how old she is exactly, but I'd bet it's over a hundred years. Her daughter and my mama are old time friends and her grandson was one of the great loves of my life, back in the day. Football star and all that. Their family's land kind of criss-crosses around the municipal airport, golf course and the southeast side of Pecan Lane. Her son and I work together at the sawmill but I've never seen him out driving his mama around. Too busy making money, I reckon.
Miss Catherine used to load Willa up and drive slowly down the lane, taking in the sights of whatever season happened to be in place. One spring afternoon, they ran over my pup as we were taking a walk. Thank goodness they were going slow! Pepper just dropped and rolled into the ditch like a good dog. I think I did have to carry him up the hill that day, though. Maybe not...my mind seems to be slipping these days. Ah, yes. Blue heeler mix with a belly full of worms, compliments of my sister-in-law and her mother if I remember correctly. On more than one occasion, they had a designated driver...one who was willing to get behind the wheel and go up memory hill. More often than not, it was a nursing home employee giving that old lady one last ride to paradise.
Jim still works at the hospital too as an advisor to the few docs who dare to set up practice with the healthcare industry as we know it today. Most of the hospitalists are foreign and educated in other countries. Our company pays their company to keep them there so that the regular docs can rest and have family time. *cough cough* Ya'll would probably never understand what I'm saying unless you were there day in and out.
My good friend sent me a story from her work the other day that absolutely captured my heart. Seems there is this little brown terrier mix that some crack headed idiot drug behind a car on a rope, just for fun. The place where C works took this puppy on and she is doing well at last update. This happened two days after Butterbean died. Don't try to tell me there's no puppy heaven..I believe.
As Jerry would say "ya'll have a wonderful wacky Thursday!"
Miss Catherine used to load Willa up and drive slowly down the lane, taking in the sights of whatever season happened to be in place. One spring afternoon, they ran over my pup as we were taking a walk. Thank goodness they were going slow! Pepper just dropped and rolled into the ditch like a good dog. I think I did have to carry him up the hill that day, though. Maybe not...my mind seems to be slipping these days. Ah, yes. Blue heeler mix with a belly full of worms, compliments of my sister-in-law and her mother if I remember correctly. On more than one occasion, they had a designated driver...one who was willing to get behind the wheel and go up memory hill. More often than not, it was a nursing home employee giving that old lady one last ride to paradise.
Jim still works at the hospital too as an advisor to the few docs who dare to set up practice with the healthcare industry as we know it today. Most of the hospitalists are foreign and educated in other countries. Our company pays their company to keep them there so that the regular docs can rest and have family time. *cough cough* Ya'll would probably never understand what I'm saying unless you were there day in and out.
My good friend sent me a story from her work the other day that absolutely captured my heart. Seems there is this little brown terrier mix that some crack headed idiot drug behind a car on a rope, just for fun. The place where C works took this puppy on and she is doing well at last update. This happened two days after Butterbean died. Don't try to tell me there's no puppy heaven..I believe.
As Jerry would say "ya'll have a wonderful wacky Thursday!"
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
attitude plus
I've been off for a couple of days, trying in my piddly half-assed way to make piles and get things in some sort of order. There's not nearly as many bills as there used to be back in the day, but it's enough to require daily monitoring, if you know what I mean. Things should look rosy by next week. Thanks Big Ernie.
While I've been busy with my own life, a dear friend has been blindsided with multiple fires to TRY to put out. He has every reason in the world to say to hell with it and feel sorry for himself. Yet he managed, for two days in a row, to write things to some friends that gave a true perspective on his inspirational talent. Being the easily distracted person that I am, I totally forgot that he had emergency surgery last week.
And then the damn really broke!
This one's for you, Cowboy. Big hugs all around ^j^
While I've been busy with my own life, a dear friend has been blindsided with multiple fires to TRY to put out. He has every reason in the world to say to hell with it and feel sorry for himself. Yet he managed, for two days in a row, to write things to some friends that gave a true perspective on his inspirational talent. Being the easily distracted person that I am, I totally forgot that he had emergency surgery last week.
And then the damn really broke!
This one's for you, Cowboy. Big hugs all around ^j^
Monday, November 16, 2009
I was eating lunch in the breakroom that day when Bubba called me from Hornbeak. "Daddy's had a wreck and I can't get there. Will you go check it out?" Off in a flash, I headed toward the highway crossover that had been the scene of many more accidents, two with my mom and one with a teenaged BG. When I got to the scene, Daddy was in his truck, minus the bumper and stuff getting ready to cross back over. I eased up next to him and asked him where he was going. " To pick your mom up at the beauty shop" was his reply. The cop was over on the road to our houses, talking to the other driver. She turned out to be real shady, by the way. Had a TV type lawyer call them later. Daddy told Bubba he had been in a hit and run. He didn't warn him that HE was the runner!
I convinced him to head toward home and let me pick mom up. As he pointed the banged up truck westward, I tried to get a word with the cop. "I've gotta catch him!" he said. So he cut him off in the parking lot of the car shop and read him the riot act about improper registration and leaving the scene and whatnot. Dude looked kinda like Billy Bob Thornton, only without the sex appeal. As fate would have it, daddy's doc was with Bubba and he found out about the whole deal. Two letters to the state resulted in his license being pulled and we all breathed a sigh of relief. It's a long story, but he had been hittin' things for awhile.
That's when we became a village, of sorts. Since neither of them can drive, Bubba and BG and me are their personal shoppers/daily visitors/taxis. As a family, we have grown because of this with bonds being forged that will never be broken because we've been on this journey together. T and the grandboy are far away, and that makes mom sad sometimes. That and being in the house all day with an ornery OCD dementia patient. We're adapting our routines now to blend with his so that he doesn't get mad and break the recliner again. Hey...sometimes you gotta laugh :) Cousin Deb's husband Ronnie and he get along really well so they're going to ride the farm this Saturday while we celebrate mom's birthday, all girlified. Gaga's china will do real nice, I think.
^j^
I convinced him to head toward home and let me pick mom up. As he pointed the banged up truck westward, I tried to get a word with the cop. "I've gotta catch him!" he said. So he cut him off in the parking lot of the car shop and read him the riot act about improper registration and leaving the scene and whatnot. Dude looked kinda like Billy Bob Thornton, only without the sex appeal. As fate would have it, daddy's doc was with Bubba and he found out about the whole deal. Two letters to the state resulted in his license being pulled and we all breathed a sigh of relief. It's a long story, but he had been hittin' things for awhile.
That's when we became a village, of sorts. Since neither of them can drive, Bubba and BG and me are their personal shoppers/daily visitors/taxis. As a family, we have grown because of this with bonds being forged that will never be broken because we've been on this journey together. T and the grandboy are far away, and that makes mom sad sometimes. That and being in the house all day with an ornery OCD dementia patient. We're adapting our routines now to blend with his so that he doesn't get mad and break the recliner again. Hey...sometimes you gotta laugh :) Cousin Deb's husband Ronnie and he get along really well so they're going to ride the farm this Saturday while we celebrate mom's birthday, all girlified. Gaga's china will do real nice, I think.
^j^
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