February 14th is my parents' anniversary and yes indeed, they planned it specifically for V Day while he was home on leave. This makes number 62 which I remember because I was born a year and a half later. Since Daddy's death I have watched my dear mother pretty much give up on life because it hurts to be lonely and blind and not able to get around AND missing the love of your life. Twice this week my co-worker told me that she's calling for him early morning. I want to let go so badly but she's doing well medically and it's day 3 after major surgery so there you go. She is in both physical and emotional pain except when doctored up with pain meds and that's okay...it's what they're for. Seeing her in this much distress reminds me that it's not all about how my life is going when hers is on the line. That I can walk away and know my friends are doing their best is a blessing beyond words. Mo just sent a message that she's sleeping so that's a good thing.
It's at this point that one realizes that you can't lose yourself with things change. I treasure my alone time now and so does BG because we're just pretty much tired of dealing with people and their drama. The cold I've been carrying for six weeks needed a hit of albuterol and when I got to the pharmacy there was a $175 co-pay because January! If I have an asthma attack and die it's Blue Cross/ Blue Shield's fault. Somebody write that down! I stopped by the sawmill today on my way out and scored some sweets from last night's chili supper at Bogota Baptist. We chatted about our friend Tim and his daddy's service today. When I look at what we have been through collectively as a team, I can't believe we're still kicking. Dear Timmy T...I forgive you for not dumping your paper trash. Mama said some guy kept checking on her last night and talking about me and I said it was probably a new nurse or something? Turns out it was good old Slim Tim. I know every blessed one of them except for a handful of newbies. Of course EVS, food service and other functions have been outsourced and that's kind of complicated. She hates their food and I totally get it.
Maybe some chicken salad would help, you think ? Fruit tea perhaps.