the beginning of the end

Christmas Sunday is a trigger point for me.  I won't go on and on but the story is short.  Mama's nurse at the rehab took her to church that day and Lauren was on the way to meet her.  Somewhere between the Sellers class and the sanctuary, her hip broke from osteoporosis and we ended up in the ER.  She never went back to Maple Ridge.  Her last days were spent in and out of surgery and rehab.  I will never forget that Christmas.  Me and Lauren and Bubba brought the food and shared it with her but I could see the light going out in her eyes.  It was nobody's fault, just life happening.  She died on a snowy night in January from something totally unrelated.  My youngest brother was with her.  Me and Mo came when he called and did our mourning together before she went off to Curry's.  I gently removed the chain that held hers and daddy's wedding bands and Millette put it around my neck.  

These are my memories.  I'm not looking for sympathy because everybody goes through it.  I do, however, have this space to share my feelings and that is a gift.  I have a book picked out that Mama gave me many Christmas's ago to read with a friend tomorrow.  As a storyteller, that should work out well for the both of us.  

I visited the GI doc today to schedule my upcoming colostomy that is required before I can get my gut reconnected.  That will happen on the 28th through the ostomy.  I always wondered how that would work.  

Peace and love to you and yours ^j^