Thursday, May 15, 2014

runnin' on empty

What a freakin' day, man. I'm thanking sweet baby jeebus I made it out the door on this particular ladies night and have plans for nothing more than beer, TV and foot soaking. Normally a trojan horse when it comes to carrying on and on and on, this one just plain old kicked my ass. And that would be my OLD ass. I wondered to myself how in the world I could ever keep up that pace at 70 which is what I'll have to do to survive unless Sugardaddy shows up between now and then. And of course the older and tireder I get and look, the harder it is to find an SD who isn't 80 years old and requires a pre-nup. As a girl, I believed that there was "one true love" out there for everybody and I thought I had found it many times. As it turns out, I all believed in it more than they did. As the daughter of an emotionally absent father I found myself pairing up with the same type as an adult. Like they say in recovery "You marry one parent and turn into the other one." My abrupt departure to therapy land showed me these things and more.

I like to think that I've turned into the best of both with my mother's social side balancing out Daddy's work ethic and temper. I have worked since I was 14 at some job or another and paid half down on my first car. It was the coolest job ever being a lifeguard at the Moose pool. We made 50 cents an hour for babysitting rich people's kids and cooking them 'burgers. I babysat when I was older but never much cared for little kids until BG came along. Once her great great uncle in Texas told us we needed to "get a'hold of her" or we'd be sorry. That was while she was eating butter pats off the iced bowl. She later threw up in our bed (ack) and the next day we went to Padre Island which was freaking amazing. No tourists where we were...just sand and surf. My husband's family spoke harshly of the ones who were everywhere, spitting the name out with hate. "They're EVERYWHERE" Aunt Sue said. She was Aunt Nez's sister and Nez went with us riding next to BG in the back seat of our Camry for 18 hours straight. Did I mention she didn't have legs? Yeah. So there was a bedpan and all. I'm sure Austin is beautiful but you can have the state as a whole because of Rick Perry.

Ya'll know I can't resist getting into the fray now and then when a social media type person takes a swing at my beliefs. There is a sign somewhere along my daily route that says: " Imperfection isn't a person. It's an event." That is true of everything in life be it career or family or spirituality. We all fall short of the gifts we've been given. Every single one of them come from Big Ernie. The thing I don't understand, and this is strictly non-partisan, is that people who have more money than they will ever spend fail to help out the least of these. And Jesus wept.


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