hard times

One of my favorite JT tunes with the chorus "You got to hold on" that plays right to my soul. Thanks to the wonder of text messaging I was able to talk with my cousin as she sat with her dying hubby and got the message pretty quickly when it was all over. If you've never been through that experience let me tell you that it's pure torture waiting for that last breath. Dying is terribly hard work for a body. It makes me incredibly sad to think about him suffering and her trying to be brave and get the rest of the family on the same page. When I go I pray that it will be quick because I don't suffer well. There will be a cremation and memorial service that I can't attend, except in spirit, to say goodbye to my dear cousin Mark. I will always remember him as the red headed freckle faced fun loving guy that he was. Another cousin is traveling to Ireland next week to scatter the ashes of her late best friend from a mountain top. Everyone should have some type of tribute and the world should stand still for just that moment. I remember talking with my friend Hoss during his last days. He couldn't speak well, and didn't really remember who I was but it was what I needed none the less. Closure, so to speak.

Another of my fav holding on songs is by Wilson Phillips. I think if I could have that playing in my ear 24/7 there would probably be a lot fewer tears. I watched Grace is Gone again yesterday and still loved every little bitty piece of it. Those little girls bouncing off of a very dull and emotionally stunted Cusack character make me laugh AND cry at the same time. The film is a very moving piece about the past ten years of war and its' effects on the families left at home. I must say that I've seen very few come back from that conflict unscathed emotionally. One guy, a friend's husband, lost it to PTSD while driving through interstate traffic in Atlanta. NOT a good place to lose it, especially with kids in the car. She was scared.to.death. I do not discount the horror of what these brave men and women have endured in the name of national security. Now I look at us sucking up to the rebels in Syria who have been openly associated with you-know-what. So like...who's more evil AlQ or Russia?

Yet ANOTHER friend received a diagnosis and treatment for melanoma on his bald little head and he's just now getting back to work. It's a must for him to wear a hat when we hang out at Gigi's pool. His little granddaughter is pure white with white blonde hair and not big as a minute. Last summer she was way shy but this year she's all about some action. She's just one of the many grandarlings, as Marti Ann calls hers,to keep that pool in waves for the coming years. There's one we call Two Scoops because that's exactly what his little freckled cheeks look like...scoops of something like ice cream. His two red headed cousins are almost always there. And course there's Gigi and Lisa, my sisters kinda sorta but not fully until I have to go through hell with the older two. No thanks, ya'll. You're better women than me!

My friend is dealing with a fortunately early case of breast cancer and is waiting for more test results to begin treatment. She's not a crying type person anyway, and she has sailed through this thing like the tough as nails gal that she is. Coming from a family of 13 siblings and right smack in the middle, she's seen some hard times too. Her sister-in-law is a Barbie collector and bought my 50 year old somewhat shabby original for 350 bucks! She didn't think twice and neither did I. If I was a betting gal I'd say we'll be having some thunderstorms soon based on my totally unscientific viewing of odd shaped dark clouds. My brother is an ex-TV weatherman who does radio and website reporting now. It's the only way to manage when you've got little kids!And on the other side of our world Westboro Baptist continues to spew hate and death and Republicans are re-examining their current state which is as scientists would say "not good." Ditto for the dems. Eric Holder is being hatchet man for a lot of dirty shit that could be stopped by a responsible president. The spying thing while disturbing, is a necessary evil to try to screen folks out of jihad on our soil. To try to prosecute the whistle blowers is more histrionics by a Congress that is out of control. Same thing for Assange. Get over it already...we've got bigger problems like what to eat when nothing will grow in the wasteland of nuclear fallout. Hey, I told ya'll I was in a mood.

The grands are in a holding pattern but I see something on the horizon because BG left for her other job and they haven't "needed" her or anybody else outside of Ms Faye, bless her heart. I just realized that I haven't stretched in days and my shoulders can tell it. Time for a little chair yoga, I say. And aleve of course.

Over and out from the lane ^j^