As a faithful and loving servant to many, I find myself completely and totally wore ass out from being a caregiver to many and not a receiver of much back if you don't count the dirty looks I get every time I decide to drop by and visit my mother. No...not from her. Ya'll know who the devil on a schedule is by now, surely. Things have gone from bad to worse over the past week with him stonewalling and her crying and falling a lot. We stopped by for a visit today but got run out before mom ever got out of the shower. BG greeted him with a big smiling hug and told him on the way out that he's damn hateful. I agree and we have humored him as having a "condition" rather than just being mean. This is the man who has never told me that he loves me, and he probably doesn't right now because I'm the bad guy, me and my brother. The gig is up dude, try to go out with some style.
The finances are badder than ever so we're focusing on positives like lots of hugs and random group sessions on the state of our union. If I had the money I'd hire an accountant to tell me that I'm throwing my hard earned money away. But alas, that is not the case. I do not buy new clothes until the old ones look like the dogs slept on 'em. Vanity items like jewelry and makeup are history. I still manage to wear cute earrings thanks to my salsa sister Athena's flair for design. We have to bring our own pens to the sawmill now so they're at a premium with lots of watching for the thief who picks up a nice one and pockets it. Hah..and ya'll thought I wasn't watching!
Still waiting on that 1099 for the privilege of taking an early distribution on my 20 plus years of service with a healthcare system that bears the name of my home church. I will never as long as I live forget watching the CEO of said company pitch their "mission" at annual conference. At that point, I was over it. It was a typical big fish little fish game of acquisition and we all lost. My accumulated sick leave that totaled almost 1000 hours was cut quite swiftly in half as a result of the acquisition that followed. I'm such a damn Pollyanna that I honestly believed it was something positive. My bad, ya'll. It's all about the dollar just like with any other business. Visions come and go, ya know? Look at where Steve Jobs is now. Is that kind of total devotion worth wasting precious days of life for? He died one of the richest men around, just like the paupers do. Makes a girl think about priorities and whatnot.
Meanwhile, I'm all excited about January being (almost) over because it's just been a bitch of a year so far. My new goal is to have the house clean by Easter, that is...if I manage to give up being lazy for Lent. It's looking "not bad" as Hoss would say the scientists say.
^j^
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