now where was i

Oh yeah..in my head as usual.  Typing out my fears and gratitude one day at a time.  It's what writers do when they have their own little spot.  I honestly never worry about what people think because it's such good therapy.  My camera is charged with card in place for a meeting tomorrow.  That will be after a funeral home visit and lunch with a friend.  It feels good to have plans even if the sky might fall and something gets postponed.  That's life.  You adapt to change and don't fret about it.  That is seriously bad for your mental health according to stress management professionals.  

Each of us is the manifestation of our own sense of peace and grace with the help of Big Ernie but you gotta' wanna'.  It takes work to trust that God is in control.  It also requires that we deal with ourselves honestly.  I have never been a follower.  From the time I was 12 or so I found myself surrounded by friends who had alcoholic and or depressed parents.  My own family had a lot of that running through the genes.  Because I grew up in the 50s and 60s I saw a lot that many only know about through history books.  I learned a lot during that time about protest for human rights and inclusion.

This thing with the wall needs to stop.  Our government is reeling out of control because nobody will step up to Mitch.  I don't wish anybody ill will but umm...I had a friend who really wasn't one who told me I was an idiot for supporting Obamajama.  First time around I was skeptical and didn't vote.  Second time?  I was all in.  I didn't vote for HRC which is how we got from there to here.  Out of my control, y'all.  I did not think she would be a good POTUS.  

In other news Reaves is going viral with all her adventures and I love it.  I haven't seen my girls in two weeks.  Maybe we'll splurge on some Rock'n'Dough this Sunday.

Namaste ~

polar vortex

Well, here we are in the midst of a record setting freeze across the country and all you know who can say is "How can global warming be real when it's this cold."  Bless his little orange head.  I got up early today knowing that it would be colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra and bobbled my way toward town.  About Southtown, I started noticing snow which was strange because there was nothing on the lane.  Schools were called off and everything and there I was ignorant of the weather 2 miles north.  I headed on over to Kroger and stocked up because I had zero grub and household supplies.  I got a big hug from my cousin Jonathan who was busy stocking vitamins.  Same for cousin Marilyn in the meat section.  We both snatched up a cheap pork loin.  

The dogs just went nuts and when I looked out I spotted a farmer on a John Deere, probably spreading something on the wheat.  Thank you sweetbabyjesus for no corn this year.  It's the little things that mean so much.  I am actively layering and dripping faucets to survive the snap.  I feel so badly for those up north.  It's a hundred year freeze for them.  

I am writing and getting back into photography in my spare time.  There is a local photo contest that has previously restricted entries to the previous year.  That has been dropped and I have a LOT of good shots from the badass Leica, RIP.  It never hurts to try say my coaches. 

Bundle up y'all ^j^ 

the natives are restless

I believe there is an anti-tRump campaign going on in NYC as I type.  Are we surprised?  Honey if you are, go back in your rabbit hole and wait to see your shadow.  Already the field for 2020 is filled with wannabes and enigmas like Starbucks guy.  His strategy is much like Trump's without the collusion:  Try to get elected on an ego trip joy ride based on your brand.  Everybody loves a latte, right?

Here's the thing.  Unless you are already rich, you cannot afford to finance a campaign against someone with lots of PAC money and corporate donations.  You can be the finest upstanding citizen in the world, but if people don't know what you stand for they'll just follow party lines.  It's a fact.  I supported a candidate in the West Tennessee area a couple of years ago because he actually took the time to come and visit me personally at my home. This was no short drive and he went to Martin after that.  Adrian lost that race, but went on to become a commissioner in Madison county for BG's district.  He will be a valuable asset.  Our local board of alderpeople got upended in November and it is refreshing to see new faces and ideas being put out there.  If this county is to thrive, we have to get things in order. 

Some of you won't like this worth a flip but it's my little corner of the world so here ya' go.  I've never been a big Pelosi fan just because I didn't know that much about her.  I believe with all my heart that if she had not done the SOTU threat, we would still be dealing with a shut down government.  I am extremely pleased that the show will go on and that Mueller is wrapping things up.   And also because the new AG is on hold.  Things are falling into place.

And how do I know this?  Because I stay informed and read from a lot of different angles.  I have firm belief that the state of the entire world is based on our strength as a nation and we are being splintered and turned against one another.  

All we are saying, is give peace a chance ~ John Lennon

holistic

I spent today doing things that have been on my list forever like hauling off cans and shopping at Sunflower Health.  Lorna told me what to get and Donna hooked me up.  I dropped a chunk of money but it's well spent if it improves my health.  She has a new skin care line called Wild Hippie and she showed me all the products.  I will be back!  Gotta take care of this aging epidermis.  

Lorna and I met up for a proper chat and lunch at Dave's.  Of all things we talked about serial killers because I've been watching Ted Bundy.  She told me about one I didn't remember so we googled it.  He was a trucker with a certain route and picked his victims along that path randomly.  O.M.G.  Note to self:  Stay away from truck stops.

There is a three day old thread on my FB page over the border wall which I think is impressive.  While we're all in the mood to discuss let's lay it on the table.  Statistics show...ahem...that the majority of Americans are against the construction and also not too happy with Trump.  That's not Breitbart or Huffpost or any other extremist publication.  That, is what we know as Americans.  We have blindly been fed all this bullshit and due to probable collusion with another country or two ended up where we are.  Fine then.  Let's fix it and focus on the problems like infrastructure and social networks.  If it takes impeachment to do that, so be it.  If I were him, I would just walk away.  Except that he would lose all power because the money will be gone.  Sucks to be him.  Nancy Pelosi alone did not do this.  Voters in November 2018 did.

Poopie for president ~

s

blink of an eye

Our little 'burg is full of grief over the sudden death of one of our finest residents.  He and I literally grew up together in the UMC and he found his way through various careers to his calling home as a Methodist pastor.  He will be sorely missed.  I had church this morning with Steve Gaines live from Bellevue Baptist, another hometown guy.  One of the things he mentioned that really struck me was the football locker room story where they all prayed the Lord's prayer together.  He shared how little that prayer meant when all they wanted was to win.  I admire that kind of honesty.  We don't agree theologically on everything but he's a good messenger.  

Life is coming together in a patchwork fashion that still amazes me.  I re-connected with a care team member today and found that she is the wife of my neighbors' church pastor.  She is beautiful inside and out.  A hawk or something almost smacked into the windshield on my way home which would certainly have caused nothing but trouble.  I had already kind of braced myself for the impact and just missed him.  Dude was flying LOW.  

It's a beautiful spring teaser of a day like January will toss out on occasion.   Mrs. Council's straight row of buttercups in the pine grove is coming up on schedule and so are the others.  Just please don't bloom yet kids!  

Y'all be happy and healthy and grateful for it all whatever comes.  Gratitude works wonders when things look impossible.

Keep the faith ^j^

to wall or not to wall

It ain't over 'til the fat lady sings and she's not even warmed up yet.  The government is open for 21 days because Trump had a very bad day on Friday what with flight delays and Stone's arrest.  I fully expect that the deal he wants will not be struck and he will shut it down again and declare a national emergency.  That will be his legacy.  Ann Coulter called him a wimp.  Man, she's an evil one.  Lots of the talking heads on the right are fueling the fire by dissing him for a temporary reprieve for those unpaid and furloughed workers.  How incredibly sad.  

Meanwhile, I will make my first payment to the IRS on an arrangement set about 1500 bucks from a filing mistake.  I did ignore it for awhile so I guess that's on me.  I have no idea how my new life will translate into a 2018 return.  I still don't even have a W2 from CHS because they sold to WTHC this year and it's outsourced and I can't get in.  Alrighty then.  I will automatically ask for an extension unless I'm due something back which I doubt.  I'd be happy just to break even.  

It's above 40 so the ride to the 'gentral wasn't too bumpy today.  That will change over the coming week as we plunge back into the teens.  I stopped into the quilt shop to see Teresa who has been with her dying mother.  She will be going back to Florida for the funeral.  Her Mom had leukemia and it took over.  

A funny thing happened at the shady 'gentral yesterday.  The checker there is a tatted up dude from Miami and looks distinctively Cuban.  He has kids and knows a lot of the customers that way.  Also, he is a boxer.  The lady in front of me yesterday got to jabbering about wanting to kick somebody's ass and she could totally do it.  He kindly explained to her that you have to be trained and certified to do REAL boxing.  She was still kicking butt on the way out.  

Find joy and humor where you can ^j^

the plot thickens

Alrighty then.  Stone is indicted and arrested.  I'm not sure what the bond situation is for that many felonies but it doesn't matter if he's in jail right this minute.  He has a big fat X on his back delivered by a very smart and powerful team.  And as a bonus, many more will follow in his footsteps.  The only thing I felt was relief that just maybe it's the beginning of the big shakeup.  Assange is very crafty.

I stayed home from the Jackson trip today due to the bouncing car syndrome when it's cold.  Faucets are dripping and whatnot.  I'm warm enough and that's all I ask for.  Thanks propane guy.  My epizootie has returned or else it's a different virus.  

It is quiet here vs the constant TV noise that is a part of my life now.  I actually enjoy that because it helps me to stay informed and amused.  Days of Our Lives still takes my breath away.  I was watching it in the era of Grandpa and Grandma Horton.  I'm showing my age there!

Y'all have a lovely day.  It's time to piddle and play and make piles.  Love ya....mean it ^j^

the worry gene

We parents have a sixth sense, particularly mothers.  We feel when something is not quite right or sometimes just dream up reasons to worry about our offspring whether they are children or full blown adults.  I'm guilty as hell.  Thinking back over the years I can remember several times when my gut told me "just say no" and I turned out to be right to follow the voice.  One was when a car full of girls went into an icy ditch on New Year's Eve and Babygirl wasn't there because I said not just no but hell no.  It was Y2K y'all.  I'm so glad we survived the manufactured crisis!

More votes and more deadlock are normal which is sad.  I have no idea how this is going to play out but a lot of people have already been hurt.  It will trickle down as long as the madness continues without OUR interests at heart.  You know....we the people.  I would think some of those Republican senators are feeling the heat right now from their constituents.  How long will they hold out?  Only God knows.

The Camry isn't doing too well in its' 18th winter.  It's not just hooptie looking but getting unsafe.  I'm waiting to see what the tax situation is to make a move toward getting something more reliable.  Let's pray on that one.

Stay warm~Call your mother ^j^

over the river

I have been to town two times today and drove through the rivers of Pecan Lane both times.  Since I live on a hill, it all goes downward toward the end of the end of the lane in a small pond.  There are a couple of flat spots right past my house that hold water as well.  I just prayed that the Camry would get me out and back and she did.  The next challenge will be thawing the door at 6AM.  

I just viewed a video of a whole bunch of pissed off people in McConnell's office.  The *partial* shutdown seems to be affecting people's moods. Like the ones who are not getting paid and can't eat.  Do I buy gas to get to the job where they don't pay, or food for my family?  The struggle is real.  "Have a yard sale" he said.  What compassion!

I'm doing the Kondo thing around here when the spirit moves and also watching Roma.  Both are good for the soul and a great escape from reality.  I've been through the closets and now I have to move onto folding.  I met some friends today for lunch and we hit it just about right before all the guys came in.  The temperature dropped ten degrees while we were there.  This can't be good.

Anyway....the sun will come up tomorrow ^j^

on and on

That was the title of one of my favorite songs back in the 80s by Stephen Bishop.  It came to mind today as I was processing the 4th refusal of Mitch McConnell to do the next right thing for our country.  If the man has a shred of decency he will realize that he won't live long enough to spend his riches while folks out there are literally dying because of his actions.  He has put himself between Trump and the rest of the country.  Meanwhile John Boehner is laughing all the way to the bank with his pot business.  

It is a game, the whole thing.  A fiercely fought political game with us as the players.  Okay, so maybe the kids in the MAGA hats were traumatized by the small crowd of hecklers that cussed them out.  And the elder who intervened got taunted as well.  The entire country is in a debate over which tape is real.  I think it's just another diversion from the business at hand which is restoring our government.  

When I woke up early this morning the wind was howling again, this time from the south.  There is a crack about two inches tall between the medicine cabinet and the wall and a huge draft in Lauren's closet.  It was COLD up in there.  More howling sustained winds tonight will precede a day of heavy rain.  Ugh.  

I did my job today as best I could.  I'm in training to learn organizational household skills by a master.  Every thing has a place and should be put back there,  There is simple truth there for an ADHD person like myself.  Squirrel!

Don't worry....be happy :)

bumpy ride

The trusty old Camry has presented me with another dilemma which is a problem with the struts when the weather is really cold meaning that I bounce all around the crappy streets of Dyersburg and the pot hole filled lane when it gets really cold like it is now.  I got an estimate on new ones and it's way out of my budget as in about 900 bucks for front and rear.  Alrighty then.  We will have to pray over that one.  

In all my years, I have never been to a Martin Luther King Day memorial but that changed today.  I showed up right before the marchers at the courthouse where the event was moved inside due to the cold weather.  That place was packed out with people of all races and ages.  The speaker brought up a point that I had never considered.  He spoke of folks who claim to "not see color" as those who are not being true to the cause of diversity and went on to expound on that thought.  I had never considered it that way.  We were all there to celebrate his dream of equality for all races, genders and ethnic groups.  Very uplifting.  I saw a lot of people that I knew and met some more.  There was a little boy about Reaves' age who was giving his grandma a fit so I held him for awhile to calm him down.  He went from lap to lap and arms to arms and did some gymnastics on the floor where there was not much room.  Precious boy.

Unlike a lot of southerners, I was raised to respect and live in community with African Americans.  Integration did not become a reality until I was in the 5th grade and I remember the tension all over the country during those times.  The violence.  The hatred.  But most of all the message of hope delivered by those who were committed to overcoming oppression.  We still fight that battle today over equal rights.

Always, remember who you are and what you stand for.  Like the preacher said...change requires action.  ^j^

ice ice baby

Fortunately we didn't get much here on the lane but it still took me awhile to get the car doors open.  I got the back open and with a lot of gymnastics crawled into the driver's seat and gave that door a big shove.  For a minute I thought I was gonna' have to call for help to get unstuck!  Did I ever say how much I hate winter?  Um..yes.  I'm sure Ellie has seen snow because she came from Arkansas but she has been loving her first snowy day on the lane.  All three dogs were in and out during the howling windstorm which is unusual for them.  You could literally hear it roaring for hours.

I thought I had seen it all until the kids in the MAGA hats showing their stupidity live.  Now the debate is over whether is the fault of their parents or the culture of the school.  Something tells me these guys learned it at home.  They were supposedly there for an anti-abortion thing which is predictably Catholic.  Who knew that Trumpsters will go to any length to get attention.  Ahem.

Multiple solutions to end the shut down have been countered by an offer to put DACA back in place and extend it for three years when he's the one who ended it.  Instead of keeping these folks out,  how about making it easier for them to become tax paying citizens of the US?  I don't get that one at all.  Hey....we need the money.  

I'm about to watch Tidying Up and seek inspiration for some order in this chaos of a house.  Wish me well.  

^j^

rain rain go away

Oh boy, is it gloomy.  The cold front is making its' way through with a chance of snow following a 30 degree drop in the temperature.  Ack!  My daily outing was to the 'gentral of course.  More deicer and a shower curtain PLUS Nutella.  I am so easily pleased.  

Reaves will be starting in a daycare on the 28th in a class of 6.  That's just right for her and sounds very one on one.  My schedule won't allow for a visit until next Friday but I have pictures to keep me from going into withdrawals.  

I asked Larry to go see the lost dog movie and we both decided that we shouldn't see it because we would cry the whole time.  We definitely have a soft spot for the fur babies.  I would love to see VICE but it's only on at 9:30ish PM.  Nada to that.  

My friend and MFR therapist did her magic yesterday and I have to say that I still feel a bit high from the whole experience  I have been in terrific pain for awhile.  She is opening a new office that will include other goodies like hypnosis, sound therapy and women's health.  She is indeed a mystic and true holistic healer.  That's what's up.  

And of course, the struggle is real and ongoing for our government while Melania vacations in Florida transported by the military because FLOTUS.  Sounds like today's offer is to re-instate  DACA in exchange for the wall.  Umm.  Okay.  There is a package floating with a realistic expenditure of 1B bucks to improve border security but what's his name is ignoring the offers.  Live!Speech!Today!  He so loves those live photo ops.  Since he's chained to the White House he figures it's something fun to do.  

Little blessings of the day:  SNL is back.  I'm in for the day and talked to my Babygirl who sounds strong and peaceful.  You can't ask for much more than that.  

Gratitude ~

the unwinding

If I wrote until bedtime I couldn't explain to you the relief of getting two hours of MFR by the lake today with purple rain.  A mixture of bad posture and dumb assery has had my right shoulder hostage for quite some time.  I contract while sleeping, usually curling up into a ball.  This can't be healthy.  Gay suggested a pillow between the legs.  She's a side sleeper like me.  The treatment was intense and focused and I had an out of body experience.  'Nuf said.  I sort of relate to it like the regulator in my driver's side window of the trusty old Camry.  All the wires are squished down in there where sometimes the glass will go up and sometimes not.  It's the same with the muscles and joints in your body.  

Right smack toward the end of our session I wondered if I had made a required payment in December.  Didn't remember doing it at.all.  A quick phone call to my attorney assured me that I am in compliance.  One.More.Year.  You do not play with Timothy J Ivey.  Just saying.  

Trump v Pelosi?  Who the hell knows.  I think it's at a tipping point and all the gossip is that Cohen will tell all and so will Mueller.  I sincerely pray that they both have adequate security, unlike Pelosi had for her scheduled trip to try and make nice.  It's beyond ridiculous and I can't laugh much more.  

I miss my girls and it's only been four days.  That is a signal to figure out how to get a plan of action to travel safely to and from Jackson when I'm not otherwise occupied.  Her days off are sporadic each week.  We do the best we can to stay a family under the circumstances.  

Tomorrow the deep freeze comes and thanks to propane guy I won't freeze this round.  Nor will the dogs.  ^j^

hot spot

My internet is perpetually on the blink because I am literally the last one on the line out here.  I've been rebooting the modem for months to keep it going but today that was "no help".  I called my friends at ATT and it will be next week before they can send a technician out.  Alrighty then.  I shall use my phone.  Only this time when I did a reboot I got online.  Go figure.  Since I have no TV, I am lost without the innerwebs.  

Today is wash clothes/dishes/anything that doesn't move day with a side of get your shit together girl.  My shoulders are killing me and I have an appointment with Gay's magic hands on Friday to try and loosen that stuff up.  I can literally feel the fascia constricting my body.  

We all knew this was coming in Syria.  And also in Kenya.  It's predictable in an unpredictable sort of way.  Add to that our poor national security right now and you've got a disaster waiting to happen over a border wall that has tunnels running underneath.  We have an unhinged President and an unofficial Presidential race two years away.  Most people do not support the wall OR the shutdown.  Yet we are held hostage because nobody will step up and take the middle road to keep this country running safely.  When this is all over if there's anything left there will certainly be a movie.  I hope Alec Baldwin plays Trump.

After checking my propane yesterday and finding I had 5% to get through, I called Butch and put in an order.  When I called back today he was frantic because he had one guy on the road and the office dude didn't show up so he was stuck there instead of hauling.  This guy doesn't shake easily so it must be pretty hard for the company right now.  He's never let me freeze in all these years but he ain't superman.

I have one humble suggestion that could save the government a whole bunch of money.  EBT and SNAP are essential for some folks to eat.  On the flip side, this money is often used for sodas and candy.  If those two things were cut off, think of the money that could be saved.  Vendors who accept this form of payment would have to take the loss.  Baby steps.

Gonna' go see what the opposition is up to.  Things change pretty quickly but then they stay the same.  I do realize that the Dems are using this shutdown to make a point prior to another election.  That being said, the GOP is acting like a bunch of bullies.  When they go down, it will be of their own making.  No more...but Benghazi!  Emails! ACORN!  yada yada.  Stay on point and do something constructive to move this thing forward.

Rant over and bless us all ^j^

  

never give up hope

I saved all the cards, books and gifts that my blog fairy sent.  That fairy gave me a reason to believe during some very dark times.  She or he remains anonymous to this day.  The thing that struck me the most was that all the gifts were chosen with a personal attention to detail.  There was a large amount of money spent on me and mine during that time.  We were a couple of struggling working girls.  Somehow we stayed warm.  And somehow we survived.  

If I were not ignoring him I would make a cheeseburger joke here.  Bless his little heart for paying during a government shutdown.  MAGA!  Buy fast food for the top college team in our great nation.  It makes you look really "special".  One of the upsides of sitting with a client is that we get to watch real TV while the talk shows are on.  I've totally learned to get into that because it's a great escape from our reality at present. 

We have to stand up together, in solidarity, for peace.  This old hippie refuses to give it up.  ^j^

the book of me

I found myself trying to explain what a blog is to someone who's never been on the internet much.  I still don't think he really gets what I meant when I told him he got blogged.  I write everyday so there are about 14 years worth of tales out there under a Creative Commons license.  "You should write a book" they say.  I already have, is my response.  If somebody wants to work with me editorially on fleshing out characters and putting stories in order, I'll self publish.  Otherwise it's day by day tap by tap.  

I got my grandbaby fix today while Lauren ran errands.  She's always so busy that we rarely have time to sit and talk.  She has her stuff and I've got mine.  We struggle, parallel to each other, to do the next right thing.  Our tribes are shared as are our struggles and joys.  Dat' baby is the cutest one ever birthed in my line ( only ) and has a fiery fun spirit.  She loves to laugh and giggle and (sometimes) snuggle.  When it's time for the chair and the bottle she wants to settle into the little rug that KayKay got her when she was born because she adores soft.  She will entertain herself for long periods of time playing and exploring.  And she dearly loves her people.  She's on whole milk now and is coming off of it slowly due to constipation.  

I woke up today itching like crazy on my right shoulder and neck.  There's a rash and all I can figure is it's from wearing jackets that rub there all the time.  Within the next week we'll move from jacket to full fledged coat weather.  Note to self:  check propane.  

I will no longer give Trump the attention he so desperately wants.  At this point I think it's time for somebody to take the wheel and give the country a break.  We didn't ask for this bull.  Somebody rein him in and do some damage control.  As it stands now we've got an entire year of adjustment over a month long stonewall.  

That's all I got.  Y'all stay warm and keep the faith ^j^

secret shopper

Okay, so I slept again today.  It gave me the energy to get out and get what I needed which was crab salad and a few clothes at Penney's .  Nothing big, just jeans to work in and shirts without bleach spots.  The place looked bare of merchandise and checkers yet I was fortunate enough to get prompt kind service by 2 lovely ladies.  Same for the girl who grinned at me from the Taco Bell window.   I had intended to watch church  live stream but I even slept through that.  

Once upon a time some creep commented quite harshly about my intentions to go to church and my practice of NOT going.  The truth is I go when the Spirit moves.  I believe that the church is out in the world, one human at a time.  A one on one ministry with someone can make all the difference in that person's life.  I have several friends that discuss religion and spirituality with me and we all agree that God is Good.  All the Time.  Do not attempt to do harm in the name of the Great one or you will be smacked down Old Testament style.  Just saying.

How's that for a sermon?  Some of the most influential ministers in my life have been female.  Marti Margrave.  Dell King.  Susan Sharpe. Patti Lou Parker. Kay Curry. Delores Jones. Donna Locke. Annetta Camp. You don't forget it when someone sees the potential in you as a fierce woman with a soft side.  It is that fierceness and determination to preserve human rights that keeps me believing that all will be okay with the orange one.  The worse things get, the stupider he looks.  Sorry fans.  He's demented.

Not my circus ~

pass the popcorn

Several friends and I hit the matinee today to see The Upside and we were not disappointed.  This group brings their buckets for free refills on popcorn and uses coupons.  I passed and bought a Sprite and then nibbled on theirs.  I've been a Bryan Cranston fan since Breaking Bad so I know his talent.  He outdid himself with this one as did Kevin Hart and Nicole Kidman.  It's full of emotional ups and downs and has a happy ending.  I'm all about the happy endings these days.  

I am blissfully unaware of the real world today.  Sleeping late was delicious but that's over for a while.  I've got places to go and people to see like my girls.  I sincerely hope SNL is back tonight.  I about died without them and the Colbert crew.  I was delighted to get a live Kristin Hampton video post-flu.  This gal is hilarious.  Her car is full of beauty products that she buys and product tests on camera.  

No bitchin' here.  Peace be with you ^j^

conspiracy

Lauren and I are both big believers in conspiracy theory when it comes to government.  People in power with their own agendas have access to a lot of ways to push us ordinary citizens around.  I still believe with all my heart that someone here had it out for JFK and framed Oswald for it.  Thanks to Wallace Milam I know a lot about the subject and it has just never added up.  That was many years ago when Cuba was all up in the mix.  Fast forward to current times and we still see Russia playing with us and being helped by a willing partner.  Disgusting.  

Today's outing was to where else but the 'gentral.  They have a whole new staff, of course, because nobody lasts there very long.  The aisles were packed with inventory to put up.  They have PIN pads now only the main one died after I was rung up so we had to take the bags down to the other register and redo the whole thing. When I left the spunky little manager guy was attempting to fix the whole mess with a screwdriver.  Just bless his heart.

There is ice to the north of the 'burg but just rain here.  It is predicted to last through tomorrow.  More gray and cold but hey, it's winter.  If the sun is out, I can deal with it.  When it's like this I want to hibernate.  I have a few days off if all goes as planned.  I'm slowly easing back into a routine as is my client and her team.  She got her hair did yesterday and was excited!

As Lauren would say, stay in your lane and take care of you and yours.  Find joy where you can and expect nothing.  Be grateful.  Remember who you are.  And always, keep the faith ^j^

mexican standoff

It continues on.  I really have nothing left to say which is unusual.  That may change by tomorrow and normally does.  I should just quit reading about what this is doing to our country and play pretend it's not happening.  You know, things like no FEMA for California which just got burned out again two months ago.  Like kids in cages at the border and people not getting paid for weeks on end.  Joshua trees cut down and the park vandalized.  As much as some folks hate the government, it provides a lot of valuable functions that are removed during a shutdown.  Like FDA inspections of food.  That's a healthcare crisis waiting to happen.

99% of the people who know me and the decision that I made to retire early say it's the best thing I ever did.  It has taken me a year to overcome the stress of that career.  I hate to say it, but it's all about the money.  If you are fortunate to have a caregiver who does the right thing count yourself as very blessed.  We do what we do mostly for the patients while jumping through corporate and governmental hoops.  The 1% that never fails to gig me about not having a "real job" get some sort ego shot from putting me down.  I know how the game is played and I can take it.  The trolls don't even bother me anymore!

I have absolutely no idea where I'm headed.  I dream and have desires to do this or that but nothing has smacked me in the face yet and said "this is your life."  Learning patience and discernment has allowed me to sit back and think about what brings me joy but can also bring cash flow.  I'd like to be closer to my girls but not in their laps,  ya' know?  Reaves is growing up quickly and recklessly just like her mama and me.  That spirit can be a dual edged sword and I pray that she will be focused on her self esteem.  She hears the word love so often that should be the first thing she says.  They've been practicing.

Otherwise, the world keeps on turning.  The sunrise this morning was a brilliant orange and yellow bomb as I left the house.  Dark is obviously later now.  I found a premature buttercup in the back bed and it stirred the spring lover in me.  I know we have a way to go, but it helped.

Soldier on ~

  

out of shape

I went to exercise class today for the first time in 3 weeks and BOY could I tell I had not been.  We were all pooped after 30 minutes except for Amy the energizer bunny.  Snoozing the alarm, I slept through yoga choosing to take it easy on the start back to routine.  Lorna and I had lunch at Dave's afterward and got caught up with a proper chat.  

Yes, indeed I did watch the President's speech but there was no watch "party" so to speak.  It was predictable and more grandstanding.  I also read the fact check and wasn't surprised at all the stretches of truth and outright lies.  But hey.  Not my circus, right?  My theory is that he's shooting for a record on the longest shutdown in history.  That will be his legacy.  Meanwhile, people struggle to get by.

I aim to keep on the sunny side.  All things pass, and this will too.  Justice prevails we just don't always see it.  With all the hoopla about the wall it's refreshing that the mass shooters have taken a break to re-load.  I guess they don't want to compete with Trump for media coverage.

Y'all keep it in your own lane.  Be kind and tolerant with healthy boundaries.  Celebrate diversity.  And keep the faith ^j^

bridge building

Tonight's performance will be our POTUS live broadcasting all the reasons that he must and will have his wall.  And it will be huge!  The biggest ever!!  After much debate and waffling the major networks have decided to interrupt regular programming to deliver this to us live and in person.  Even if I had cable, I wouldn't watch.  I know that it will be more of the same.  Of course Pelosi, Schumer and Sanders will have the last words.  I'm thinking we maybe need popcorn and an extra six pack for this one!  Ms Ruth has promised to fill me in if she stays awake long enough.  And she still thinks that it's all gonna' work out.   Meanwhile, Mueller is waiting in the wings.

I ran into an old classmate today that I have not seen in 45 years.  My horoscope told me that would happen but it's usually not right.  It's odd how we reconnect with people from our past in the most unusual ways.  When that happens, I say thank you to Big Ernie for making it happen.  If you live long enough, everybody gets to do it.  That is the beauty of age and  the opportunity to go down memory lane one last time. 

And this, my friends, is what life is all about ^j^

vulgarity

I was kind of on the fence about the congresswoman calling Trump a motherfucker.  My first instinct was that it was stooping to his level but the more I thought about it the more I liked that she now has a voice.  When I  made a post yesterday stating that I was calling him that before she did I was called out for my "shitty" attitude.  "I'm sure you've accomplished a lot in your life" he said.  Me to myself : Do not engage.  There is no point in trying to have a discussion with the die hards.  The truth is that the underhanded tactics of this POTUS have driven people to become angry and desperate.  And he blames it on the Dems for not giving him his wall.  

Would my mother be proud of what I did?  Of course not.  She probably never said that word in her life.  The worst I ever heard was shit or damn.  Same for Daddy.  I am personally of the George Carlin generation that believes that a word like fuck loses its' power if said a lot.  And that's true.  I save it for really horrific things like this presidency.  Snoop Dog said it best and I won't repeat because my Mama would hear it and haunt me.  Nice girls don't do that!

I saw my girls a bit today and that was a treat.  Reaves is much better now and we had quality time until she turned over the lamp and broke the bulb.  I had to keep her jumping in the recliner until I got the glass up.  I know how to read her so when she started rubbing her eyes I pulled out the bottle and got only a little bit down before she passed smooth out.  It was an easy transfer to the bed.  We watched lots of Peppa Pig.  That's her favorite.  

She is a beautiful child inside and out and brings a lot of joy to a lot of people.  Her hair is finally growing out and it's a beautiful light auburn color that goes well with her dark eyes.  She is quite adventurous and I see plenty of minor injuries in her future.  Lauren and I are both the kind that can walk into the door facing so she'll have to train really hard not to be clumsy!!

I am sad that our country is going through this.  If it were over something that was a real threat to our safety I might understand but it is not.  It's about one man's ego and desire to win.  We are the hostages.  

Walk with faith ^j^

fore

I spent the afternoon at a residence surrounded by the country club golf course where every house has a little trail taking the golfers from green to green.  Y'all that place was covered UP today because it got over 60 and the sun was out.  It was a rare treat to sit in the January sunshine that was just a teaser, I'm sure.  

If my Daddy were still at the USDA he would more than likely be working without pay as part of Homeland Security which is where it went after he retired.  His career was spent mostly tracking the spread of farm pests in West Tennessee by sticking little pins on a map after the traps were set and read.  Plant protection specialist was his title.  A family friend got his post when this office closed and ended up working the airports like Daddy did during his last year.  That's when he said "I'm done." He was 55 years old and had 35 years of federal government service.  Back then it meant something.  His retirement was 75% of his final pay and it provided for he and Mom for many years.  

Mama was retired too and we lived a mile away when Lauren was a kid so they had lots of adventures.  She was the only grandchild for two decades and got the royal treatment of two grandparents who totally enjoyed her.  They had a special bond, especially she and Mama.  The first time I ever heard Daddy say I love you was to her.  He rarely told me even at the end.  I would tell him anyway just to watch him squirm.  Because I never heard it from my own parents, I was determined to tell Lauren often.  Everybody deserves to know unconditional parental love.  When I look at Reaves, I know that she has that love from both parents and indeed an entire tribe.  That explains the joyful attitude.  

The sunsets yesterday and today were to die for.  Thank you Lord for the beauty of the earth.  ^j^

a hot mess

I am so totally the opposite of OCD it ain't even funny, yet I recognize that trait in people because their sense of sanity depends on things being orderly.  I'm not made that way so I have to be vigilant about doing every little thing as it should be done.  Like shutting closet doors and turning off lights.  I just, by nature, don't go room to room and close up shop when I leave.  That's why the house is such a mess I guess.  I am strewn all over it but I stay mainly in three of the main floor rooms.  The other two are filled with "stuff."  Since I know that I will be here for a minute it's time for me to create a comfy living space with all the essentials close.  We called my mother's chair side table "command central."  

I spent today with a lovely lady watching TV and doing a little clean up and cooking.  She was craving tacos so I whipped them up and then cleaned up behind myself.  If I would only do that here there wouldn't be the cluster of junk in every corner.  It's time to purge and be fearless.  I've still got a lot of cool stuff that would make another house sale.  Just gotta get it cleaner.

I talked to one brother this afternoon and got an update on his surgery.  Otha' brother messaged and I missed it.  He's headed to job #2 as we speak.  His president is about to get us all killed, or at least headed toward anarchy.  The latest brilliant idea rolling around is to use the Defense Budget for the Wall.  Now that is an idea I could get behind.  Imagine, if you will, how many terrorists have flown into US airports undetected because nobody at TSA goes to work when they don't get paid.  I don't blame them at all.  A warning to the Dems as we enter this phase of meeting in the middle.  Don't be arrogant like they are.  Just don't.  It makes you look cheap and not worth the trust that voters have put in your hands.  

As for the IRS, they are under a "planned" shutdown and I received a letter confirming my payment arrangement to begin Feb 1st.  We shall see if any action is forthcoming from DC.  Tax refund time is good for the economy and to delay that is to further weaken the ability of marginally living people to survive.  It's already bad enough.  Ms Ruth thinks it will all work out and I pray to sweet baby jesus it does.  My faith tells me that she's right.  

^j^

from bad to better

I was forced to venture out into the chilling wetness of today to get food because I had nothing....not even a cracker.  I left Kroger with some grub and stopped by Lucky which is where the problems started.  The car, which had a brand new battery, would not start.  Michelle brought a charger over but when I tried again it started.  They both told me to get the alternator checked ASAP which I did at AutoZone.  There was something going on she said because the readings were fluctuating.  She suggested that it might be that nasty red terminal with the nekkid wire.  

So next stop was Bart's Lake Road Service where it started long enough for me to go BACK to AZ to get a cable.  I cruised back up to where I was previously parked which was behind an oil change.  Turned it off and it never started again.  They pushed it out from behind the oil change and up into the bay. A starter was ordered and arrived while I visited with Cathy.  People came in and out, some of them with attitudes.  After a couple of hours I saw the mechanic call Bart to the bay and I though...Lerd.  What now?  Robert got to tell me the good news which is that the problem was a broken cable and not the starter itself.  Girl, you should have seen me doing the happy dance all over that little office.  Honesty and integrity in business saved me 200 bucks.  It gave me some faith.

That was my day!  Hope yours was super  ^j^

the sunny side of life

Still, today no sunshine.  Maybe tomorrow after the next rain passes.  It's from the south and looks big.  This makes me mighty glad to be in the little old burg because I hate the rat race that is Memphis.  Two years in college there was enough for this country girl.  The Memphis State area was "relatively" safe then but I spent the last year in the 8th floor of a residential tower next to downtown.That was where there used to be a Baptist hospital close to what is now known as the UT Liver Transplant hub and John Gaston.  The VA was to the back of the medical school campus and all of these facilities are where we did our clinical rotations.  There was a statue of Nathan Bedford Forrest in the park across the street.  Memphis has its' ethnic history you know.  A lot of successful musicians got their careers started there and many were Mississipi migrants.  It's so wierd because you can get on a street in Memphis and once you hit Goodman Road you're in the great state of MS, the magnolia state.  

I couldn't sleep last night because I knew I had to get up early, if that makes any sense.  When I go down it has been, of late, until the spirit moves me to get up.  Client #1 was glad to see me and I met two other parts of our crew both of whom are delightful.  Home health came and spent a long time reconnecting with her and doing what they do.  I was totally impressed as I was with my parents' care.  Now THEY were a challenge.  The social worker finally said her goodbyes to them when she saw she was getting no damn where with Billy G.  

This is what I love about home care.  If you have an advocate and caregiver there with you to observe and become a part of the team, it's a win win.  And all this time I was told Home Health didn't have a use for med techs.  Nurses can draw that blood!  Someone with the clinical knowledge to help in the care plan is a plus any time.  Fortunately this client has several like that in her tribe including a child.  

The Army is back again after quite an absence.  I wonder what this mission is today?  They headed toward DC so maybe there's gonna be a riot or something.  Things are getting pretty high strung and ridiculous.  I'm so glad Colbert will be off of vacay soon.

Ya'll smile and be nice ^j^ 

how great thou art

I was treated to some good old Southern Baptist piano playing while with my client today.  Her family brought her piano from home to put it in the living room of her apartment and she was tickled to death.  She's very good and used to play the organ at church.  Obviously she can see better than me because she was studying that hymnal and pounding out the hymns.  I couldn't even read the tiny music.  I'm sure I'll be back at some point but client #1 goes home today and I report early AM.  I am trying to help #2's family find some help.  

Reaves and Lauren have strep again or else never got rid of it the last time.  Back in the day Dr. Melton and Connell would give a giant 'cillin shot in the leg to kick it in the ass when it came back.  Evidently that's not common practice any more.  It truly is an awfully painful shot and was usually given by Ms. Cookie.  Dr Melton caught a lot of criticism when he first came for not treating viral infections with antibiotics which, of course, do no good.  Over prescribing of antibiotics is mainly why we have so many strains of all kinds of bacteria as they mutate and become resistant.  Like MRSA and VRE.  They all have acronyms based on what they're resistant to.  Scary stuff.  I read today that Clostridium difficile spores are not killed by usual medical cleaning methods, as in sheets, etc.  This is also very scary because it usually occurs after the use of heavy antibiotics and is quite contagious.  If you're not sick when you go in the hospital, the chances are you'll leave there with something!

Old Mitt is giving Trump a fit and has been banished to being a "Flake" as in Jeff.  Anybody who disagrees with him is wrong.  Harry Reid calls him the worst president he's ever seen and he's an old dude.  I had totally forgotten that Clinton was impeached.  Duh.  I guess I was busy during that time chasing a teenager.  Whitewater and Monica.  History repeats itself I suppose only bigger and badder.

I kind of feel like I'm in a time warp or something.  It is unsettling and I can't begin to explain it.  I hope it's not purgatory!  The weather has a lot to do with it as in SADD and dreary days of winter.  Probably ought to load up on Vitamin D.  I am currently watching a docu-series based on a John Grisham book.  The Innocent Man follows the case of multiple people involved in the initial investigation up through the ones who are still a part of it.  Two women in Ada, Oklahoma were murdered in the 70s.  It's a wonderful "whodunit" with a lot of twists and turns.  

Let the sunshine in ~

obstructionist democrats

That is a timely term coined by our POTUS as we enter day ummm10? of a government shutdown.  Those "obstructionists" have a plan to get the government going again but I'm pretty sure Cheeto head and his tribe will find a way to keep folks suffering a little longer.  He's already been hit with a lawsuit by those who are working without pay.  I guess that's one way to trim down the debt...by not paying the people who work for you.  What a disgrace.  I hope it's Mueller time soon.  

WE did not ask for this.  Our opinions don't matter one bit because they are hell bent on building that steel slat wall.  Add to that the dangers of abandoning a trade agreement with Mexico and Canada and you have the perfect storm.  China is already done with us on the tariffs.  I did not support NAFTA because it led to a lot of outsourcing of American jobs but it is what it was and is.  It's a very helpless feeling for many Americans as we watch our partnership with allies crumble on one man's whim.  

Reaves had a fever of 102 last night so Lauren took her to both hospital ERs and never got seen.  They just gave up and went home to hit the ibuprofen.  This is what is happening in a lot of rural areas.  Due to the closure of various small facilities in our area the ERs at the larger ones are packed out.  We still have one here in Dyersburg but many times the sister hospital in Jackson is too full to accept transfers so patients must go to Memphis which is 90 minutes away in good weather and light traffic.  Or, if you're critical enough they will airlift you to Nashville perhaps.  You never know.  Is healthcare in crisis?  Hell yes.  

And you know what the common denominator is in all these crises?  Greed and a lack of compassion.  When greed takes over, all humanity goes out the window.  Immigrants are mistreated.  Patients get stuck in the hamster wheel.  The courts fill up with frivolous cases over petty stuff that feeds the coffers.  Everything is privatized from environmental service to prisons.  Mo' money.  

I don't have the answers.  Like my new BFF Kristen Hampton said today "Be nice. And beautiful."  She product tested a flashing LED mask that looked like the Phantom in her car today and it was, as usual, a hoot.  It had a "using manual" and everything.  Supposed to get rid of wrinkles!!

It's a brand new year.  Fake it 'til you make it ^j^