John Mayer has a tune with that refrain that I sang at the top of my lungs as a newly single girl believing that love was right around the corner. Boy was I wrong!! Those were my early blogging days and the time when Yahoo! chat rooms, bots notwithstanding, were my way to look for men. Yeah, right. Hey...you live and you learn. One guy who drove here to meet me for lunch said "I guess I'm gonna have to pay too, huh?" What a sweetheart. There was another one whose name was FunGUY and dude was anything but. I'll spare you the details but my reaction was "Oh NO you didn't!" I did meet a couple of guys who actually became real life long term friends. One of them I stay in touch with and the other one moved away and cut me loose. Sometimes I wonder if he remembers our two or three months of chat. He is a musician and at the time was writing for various companies trying to "always leave room for the drummer." His longtime girlfriend moved to NashVegas and that was the end of that. Shortly after me met the love of his life and called to tell me about it. "Boy do I have a story for you" he said. I'm such a sap I cried out of happiness for him.
That shit got boring in a hurry trying to fight bots for conversation plus it wasn't a real safe practice if you know what I mean. I met several on my own turf, and would do that differently if I knew then what I know now about evil people with chain saws and plastic bags. I'm finally getting used to the new phone, if not the increased cost of having two smart ones. The thing that got me in a nostalgic mood was considering how I've gone from headstrong and determined to have things my way to trying to be a receptive self respecting servant. I have firm boundaries usually, and I don't budge much because every time that I do, I get screwed. We had a friend over last night for dinner and she brought her two kids, one of a newborn. I held him for awhile and fed him, then he slept with his older sister on BG's bed. I was right behind 'em with all three dogs in my room.
After work I headed down to the old house to pick up some windows for crafty stuff. They make great frames for prints. My scrap buddy had torn the roof off since I was there and day by day it's looking less like a haunted house and more like a piece of history, albeit musty. Obviously my daddy never threw ANYTHING away ever. Mama's a packrat too so it was full to the rafters with stuff. Let's say I have become much more of a minimalist as I've aged because really? You can't take it with you. No way is Big Ernie gonna allow you to take that ancient plaid lunch box into heaven. Or maybe so...who knows? One thing I know for sure, the haters like Westboro and all the bigots will be at the end of the line and the gate will close when they arrive. The rhetoric in this country right now is insane fueled by hatred of a huge and inefficient federal government thanks to Congress. The president shares some of the blame for that, I agree. He's not playing hardball like he should be because WE ARE DYING out here as the citizens of a country so great that it was built on hard work and determination. Though I see a shift in areas like the practice of agriculture, it still remains more profitable to spray the shit out of crops with Monsanto's flavor of the season. A piece that I read today quoted some very frightening figures about pollution in our major waterways due to chemical runoff.
I'm not really in a bitchy mood, just a thoughtful one. I don't much care anymore and that's a huge relief. I don't care what anybody thinks about me except my friends and family and I sure don't care that I'm neck deep in debt. At least I didn't lose my retirement in the crash 'cuz I could never afford to contribute. That, my friends, was the beginning of the end of the American dream. Projects that will showcase my talent are within reach now and I'm not getting any younger ya'll. It's do or die time.
I have a friend who has reported on the wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan sometimes as an embed, always with a camera. His journalistic mission has taken him all over the world, and currently he is in Asia. His work gives me a sense of humility seeing how people in the rest of our world suffer and try to find happiness while I sit here trying to figure out how to pay the loan sharks. If I could afford it, I'd do a medical mission trip. Sadly, you have to pay your own way and that's way behind the propane guy on the budget list. His mission has been fully funded by readers and he now needs about 20K for new computer stuff. If you trust me at all on things, go check him out here Michael Yon Online and see what I'm talking about. I would not have even known who Petraeus is were it not for his reporting. Break a leg dude.
Reckon that's all for hump day from Pecan Lane. Somebody seriously needs to give their kid an Easter pup or two because I'm still feeding three. I promise it will come with a bow and a basket full of chocolate eggs.
Peace out ^j^
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