brave

More car drama today.  I usually handle stress pretty well but this has been wearing on me for a loooong time now and I broke down crying in the 'gentral parking lot where the damn car wouldn't go into gear.  This was shortly after I had the brake light switch replaced.  I noticed when I left that the brakes were "tight" but assumed it was nothing and went to pick up Mamye to go to the store and when I pulled out of her driveway and it started.  We went really slow and by the time we got to the store I smelled something burning and so did she.  I popped the hood and opened it with the help of a nice older gentleman parked next to me and he smelled it too.  My only option was to have it towed back to the service center.  And so, I am grounded again.  And so is Mamye.

My friend Lorna is seriously ill and I am asking for prayer for her health and peace for her soul.  She is smart and tough like me, but sometimes the strength wears thin when times are hard.  Please lift her up.  She has pretty much been my life coach since we met.  

Sorry there is nothing inspirational here today.  I'll try harder to keep the faith ^j^

no verdict

Once again I am dealing with car problems and I so wish that Tennessee had a Lemon Law.  I have had this car for 3.5 years and now owe 160 per month on a new transmission but there other electrical issues going on involving brake lights and wacky windshield wipers coming on without being TURNED on.  Lerd.  If it ain't one thing it's ten.  I have just given it to God at this point.  Nothing else to do but pray.

Bubba brought Daddy's old battery charger out yesterday and it charged all night so that I could get out this morning.  That's when the wipers went ape shit crazy.  I cruised by the service center and told him about that but he was so covered up we won't be able to talk until he tests the new brake sensor switch.  If that doesn't fix the brake light problem it is electrical....a short, if you will.  First the navigation screen went out six months ago and it's been downhill since then.  I hate Ford.  I know Jesus doesn't like for us to hate but Ford Motor Company is huge and rips off consumers daily.  Like me the little people.

It doesn't help that I don't have a man around to advise me on all things car.  Bubba knows his stuff and is always helpful.  I don't know what I'd do without him.  He wants a big batch of cream cheese sausage balls and as soon as I'm able I will do just that.

Sorry to be a bummer today.  I know that there are others much more worse off than me and I pray for all of us.  People like Lorna Donaldson and Morgan Love.  I won't tell you their stories but ask you to lift them up when you feel the Spirit move.  

Y'all hang in there and keep the faith ^j^

grounded

Well, I knew it would happen.  My brake lights have been on for 2 days straight and I was able to get out yesterday but....this morning?  Dead as a doornail.  My mechanic has tried two different brake light switches and neither of them worked.  Sooo..it sounds like an electrical problem.  I am hoping they can fix it without a lot of cost.  Maybe a fuse or two?  Let us pray ^j^

I talked to Roe's foster just now and let her know I have not jumped ship on her adoption.  The puppies are walking and barking like crazy according to her.  I watched church online but it's not like being there in person.  But when you are stuck at home you make do.  Being grounded doesn't really bother me but other people count on me for transportation and that is frustrating.

We are "enjoying" lower temps and high humidity but that will all change this week when it heads back into the mid 90s.  Summer is not nearly over with two records broken in the past week for the hottest days ever globally.  I do pre-pay electric with Forked Deer Electric and put extra money on the books in anticipation of the hot weather to come.  

If I were smart, I would use this time to clean the house but, nah.  It is what it is I am feeling lucky to just maintain.  I started getting sick on Friday and yesterday was horrible.  Benadryl is my BFF.  For some reason allergens are out the wazoo this year and it's affecting everybody in a bad way.  

I am thinking about my mother and her love for the Olympics these days.  She looked forward to the events always and was glued to the TV.  I don't have "real" TV but I've been watching on news sites.  It beats seeing about Trump's rants as breaking news.  As a Democrat, I feel relieved and a bit excited about Kamala Harris running.  Of course DJT is afraid to debate with her except on FOX not those filthy mainstream networks.  I call BS.

Still getting used to these new uppers and it's a challenge.  Most of life is challenging right now to be honest.  I am faithful enough to believe that this too shall pass if I just leave room for the spirit to work.  

i blame the cat

Rosie gets blamed for everything that goes missing around here plus other things like that I bought a used Ford from a shady dealer a few years ago.  I read today that their CEO has tanked the company.  Currently none of the the things like lights or electronics work in my car.  2015 Ford Escape.  I will be paying for the transmission for the next 3 years because the bank has my title.  My screen is black and I listen to the local station because I can't see that navigation screen.  Once again, an electrical issue.  If I could afford a lawyer I would sue Ford but I can't so there ya' go.  I bought it used from Gene Langley Ford in Humbolt TN 3 years ago.  Live and learn.  I would give my eye teeth for a Toyoto but they are already gone and I have dentures.  

I traipsed across Crockett County today in the pouring rain so that LP could go to a job interview and I could visit Ms. Reba.  I'll spare you the details on that interview but HR failed to show up and they asked her to come back in the afternoon.  She offered do to a zoom interview but they were not receptive.  I played the Mama card and called the one person that I still know there and we chatted forever about the old days.  I realize that shit happens but damn.

Somebody hacked my FB today and it isn't the first time.  I cannot imagine having nothing better to do than mess with somebody else's social media.  I have come to learn that if somebody sends you a friend request that you are already friends with it's one of those folks.  I always just delete the request.

Rosie and I have talked about Roellen coming to live here and so far she's cool with it.  We shall see.  And leave room for the spirit to work ^j^

shoo fly

Lord y'all...the horseflies are attacking like little ninjas with no fear whatsoever.  I hear them smacking the house in between pecan drops which look like pistachios on the deck.  It has been a rainy day with more left to come for the next week but still, the irrigation system is running.  It's been pretty dry for a long period and those beans need water!  

I hate my new teeth with a passion.  As I did with the ileostomy, I am learning how to eat and process food but I bet I have lost ten pounds which I didn't have to lose.  Everybody tells me I look "little."  When I weighed 180 lbs I would have appreciated that but now it seems that I'm just wasting away.  I love to eat and to cook but there are restrictions now because Polident can only do so much.  I go for my checkup tomorrow after PT and will use my flex card for some of that high dollar mouthwash and buy more noodles.

Roe's babies walked for the first time today so they are well on their way to new adventures.  Shari and her girls are such good fosters.  The last time I was there there bitty eyes were open.  I think Roe is about over motherhood at this point and I can relate.  In reality it's never over.  As long as you live you will be as happy as your most miserable child.  I admit that it is co-dependent but it's what happens when you become a parent.  It ain't over 'til it's over.  A "death to us part" sort of deal.  My brother and I spent five years post driver's permission putting out fires to take care of Mom and Daddy at home.  He was finance and I was healthcare/lives right down the road.  There were many trips to the ER.  Several car wrecks.  Lots of drama.  The biggest issue was Mama's blindness and Daddy's dementia.  There was not a lot of patience there on either side.  He wanted to be in control of every little thing and she just wanted him to read to her from the State Gazette.  Kinda' funny I ended up as a stringer there.  Serendipity perhaps ^j^

no means no, unless it means yes

I read all day long every day which is probably not good for my back and shoulders.  The reason is that I work on a laptop or a phone and do not have ergonomic friendly devices.  Plus my cat Rosie parks her butt up right here on the desk just because she wants attention.  She has this odd little habit of laying in the wicker out back way up high.  It's a great view and so far no new tears in the screen.  She has no idea what's coming when doggo arrives.  Roe is being potty trained by her foster and the puppies are still teeny tiny so it will be a while.  I'm just fascinated with watching the mom take care of the village.

Compassionate people care for those in need.  We don't judge but choose instead to meet them where they are and figure out a road map of how to get out of the cycle.  Poverty and homelessness.  No food.  No ride.  The sheer amount of suffering is something that you cannot fathom unless you see it in person.  Oscar went across the rainbow bridge a few months ago in my bathroom floor with me bawling like a baby and my vet friend guiding me through it.  I have been lonely without a doggo and it just so happens that Roe has come into my life.  She's a short haired older mutt with five surviving puppies.  I'm asking her to come here on the farm and the puppies will go here there and yonder.  Spay and neuter people.  Teeth and bras!

I was treated to a nice head washing and cut by the fabulous Nina at Headlines this morning.  Note to self:  Find out what those products are!  She worked on me while Chucky ate his breakfast and we tossed the bullshit around.  It's hard to hear when you are almost deaf and the dryer is going.   That place is like home because I know where the bathrooms are.  They work hard and enjoy it.  Always tip your personal beauty consultant and the wait staff.  Jesus will love you for it.

A couple of dear friends were very worried about me because my mouth pain has been horrific and they talked me through it.  I am not a wuss with pain but this was BAD.  I think I've lost 8 pounds already.  Poopie is happy though because she's gettin' a rest.  It cooled off and rained a little bit today which is very nice.  Once again, I put my theory out there that the seasons are all effed up because of global warming.  If you don't get it we will all be on Costner's ship in WaterWorld.

Grace and Peace lead to faith and works ^j^

teefies

As of last week, I have new ones on the top.  The back ones were pulled last year in preparation for more extractions and a denture placement last week.  I must say that I am on the learning curve with this as far as the pain and how to care for them.  The swelling was so bad the first few days that my face was puffy and I couldn't chew.  I still can't chew well, really.  That is not a good thing for someone with an ileosotmy.  If it ain't one thing it's ten.  Getting old is not for sissies.  

I met my potential new doggo yesterday and she is sweet as pie.  Her puppies are only a week old so they will have to be weaned and some kind folks who found her will pay for her vetting.  We pray that she is heartworm negative.  Ironically, her name is Roellen, Ro for short.  She was found on the road to Roellen and thusly named.  That highway is where I got smacked by an 18 wheeler last fall while looking for a friend's house.  Dude topped the hill as I was turning and didn't have my turn signal on so I was at fault.  The nice trooper did not give me a citation because he knew that "truckers think they own the road."  I have observed many polite and gracious ones and some real asshats that go way above the speed limit.  I guess it's just like all other drivers only their rigs are HUGE.  I was lucky to survive that one but have been in physical therapy ever since.  Speaking of PT, I saw my old buddy Patrick this morning.  He is the one who treated me when I was quite frankly "pitiful" post-op with the gut surgery.  I was also lucky to survive that event.  Most everybody thought I was a goner but Big Ernie had other plans.  

I try to discern what it is that He wants me to do.  It's mostly little things but that is what counts.  Meet people where they are and don't judge.  The schism in my home church has hurt so many people, especially the ones of us who grew up there.  And all because of exclusion. 

I won't even begin to discuss political things except for the fact that I am sad for our country and where we are right now.  The rhetoric needs to calm down and so do the people.  Research before you vote.  Know your candidate.  Reach across the aisle for a better America ^j^

sean of the south

Some time ago, and don't ask me when because um...I've lost track of time, my friend Beverly posted a piece by Sean Dietrich and I was immediately hooked.  His writing style is honest and often gut wrenching as he writes about every day life, including his own.  He spends a good amount of time on the road with his one man show that includes humor and an accordion so many of his epistles are about road trips and airports.  A native Floridian who never graduated high school, he has achieved "star" status with his devoted readers, including myself.  Beverly was fortunate enough to see him in person and send me a coffee cup with his logo on it along with other gifts.  We have known each other through Facebook for years and years, since her granddaughter Ella was about the age that Reaves is now.  Seriously cute kid.  

I cannot begin to name the number of people that I know only virtually but that I consider great friends.  Many of you remember the story of the blog fairy who visited me for a couple of years.  If not, just ask and I will share again.  Then there was Old Horsetail Snake whom I actually DID meet when he took a nationwide trip to visit a few of his favorite bloggers.  I was honored to be one of them following his visit with Vicki and I then sent him on his way to Trisha.  Old Hoss has long since become a dung beetle and I miss his wit and humor still.  Hoss was a former speech writer for the governor of Oregon and had a terminally ill wife.  I sent them cookies and Tennessee stuff and shortly after she passed onto glory with his help.  That is legal in Oregon.  He chose the same path for himself to join her several years later following his many visits around the country.  

Once I was going to try and meet up with Lois Twater and that didn't happen but we did chat on the phone.  These are the people who live in my computer and they are real to me.  Bloggers are a rare breed who tend to use their blogs as therapy and in turn help others.  At least for me, that is the case.  Almost 20 years ago, my friend John Yarbro suggested that I blog to which I replied "What the hell is that?"  Live and learn.  Now almost everybody has one from food to healthcare to spirituality and more.  A weblog or blog for short, is an easy way to write and reach people.  Writing a book is tedious and I'm not built that way.  I choose to share every day what's on my mind and in my heart.  

So "Dear Sean" just know that I read every word that you write and feel it with my soul.  My style is similar to yours, though not as good.  Maybe someday ^j^

the saga continues

With my car, that is.  Following the failed bearing which was replaced under warranty it was quickly fixed and I picked it up the next day.  While at Lake Road Service Center the tires were rotated and oil changed, but they couldn't be balanced there so I had to visit the service station up the road for the balance.  They were backed up in both bays so I was told to be there first in line Monday at 7:30.  Will do, plus get them to check the brakes.

I have been waking up at the butt crack of dawn for several weeks now, like at 5 to 6 AM.  Today I had to empty el baggo at 4 AM and was then wide awake.  Lerd. I watched a pretty sunrise and then headed out to find breakfast.  All of the usual places were closed for the holiday weekend so I went to good old Huddle House that NEVER closes and had steak and eggs.  sweet Janice waited on me and wanted to know if Bubba was coming.  No girl, just me.  After that I went to the farmer's market at the fairgrounds where there were plenty of homegrown maters, squash, okra and cucumbers.  I passed on all that and bought two soy candles and a car freshie made with essential oil.  One lady at a jewlry table showed me a limited edition fancy ass drop necklace that she created in memory of her mother who would have been 95 this year.  Being limited edition, there will be only two more made and sold.  I thought that was a lovely tribute to her mother who died last year.  The downside to having it at the fairgrounds is the steep hill down to where the set up is.  Going down was easy but the hike back up tested my hiking skills.  

After that Mamye and I ran errands and then headed back home.  If I was a bettin' kind of gal I'd say I'll be out like a light before 7.  And probably wake up at 5 again.  Y'all keep the faith ^j^