where I stand

I've had a little bump of energy after being cured of the epizootie.  I actually have a bit of spring in my step, if you know what I mean.  I was sitting on the front porch a while ago and heard a woodpecker going at it ninety to nothing.   Of course I googled the spiritual meaning and it seems that opportunity is knocking on my door.  I'll take it.

It is that in between time when spring is trying desperately to break through but there's an ice storm on the way.  Flowers in my zone usually bloom in March and April but you never know.  There are fruit trees which will add to the beauty.  My first spring and summer here were haphazard in the landscaping department.  We'll see what comes up ^j^

come on people now

For the life of me I can't figure out how somebody can get their jollies by hacking a facebook account.  It's happened to me several times and is annoying as hell.  There is no point to it.  You can't get my money that way so I guess your are bored out of your head.  All my friends know they're already friends so they give me a heads up when it happens which it did today.  Get a life people.

I was absent from church today because the cupboard was bare and I was forced to hunt and gather at Kroger.  For a change, they were well stocked.  I guess the truck ran.  I ran into an old paramedic co-worker and we chatted at the deli counter about how nobody has any help and providers are stealing people from each other.  The struggle is real.  If you can make 100 bucks an hour for travel, why not unless you have a family at home.

These are things that most folks take for granted....healthcare at your beck and call, full grocery shelves etc.  The new normal includes masking up and waiting in line.  The checker today was super speedy and probably already has carpal tunnel syndrome but he and the bagger got me out quickly even with two in front of me.  

Today is a tad bit warmer so I plan to take in some Vitamin D on the deck.  Ain't nothing like it in this world.  Y'all be careful out there.  Be nice and don't hack ^j^

godwink

You know how when all seems right with the universe and everything falls into place like the good Lord intended?  We calll thank a godwink.  There is nothing like a near death experience to humble one to the point that you kinda'sorta saw the light but it wasn't your time.  That happened to me twice in one month during late 2019 and early 2020.  Y'all know the story because I have written about it a lot.  

The girls came today so we had pizza and a dance party.  Girl has some moves, I'm just saying.  She watched her cousin Olivia on the phone at HER dance class and immediately wanted to join.  I think we have an expressionist on our hands ;)  We played with the boomerang ball and Lauren managed to sail it all the way over the house into the front yard.  Best.Throw.Ever.

Please be kind or at least not hateful.  Remember, God don't like ugly ^j^

4 birds with one stone

I went to see my GP this morning because (a) i needed refills and (b) I have this kerfuffle crud that's going around.  Makes your head feel like it's in a bucket.  Everybody I know has had or currently have it.  No fever.  Just the crud.  They were out of rapid COVID tests and offered to do it the old school way but I passed.  I love my doctor because he will do what I ask if insurance allows.  Thus, I got some labs drawn.  Keeping an eye on lipids and renal function.  If the lipids are still high after a 12 hour fast, I reckon I'll have to take the medicine.  At one point when I was eating all things fried back in my 30s the HDL and such were wonky but by some miracle reversed without medication.   This is something new and I know enough about diagnostics to recheck.  He also had my all clear mammo report from last week.

We had a Joyful lunch at Dave's today and I wish I had gotten a burger.   Those things are big enough for two people! And man are they good.  Fries and onion rings too.  I used to meet Lorna there for breakfast about once a week because it's within walking distance of The Mill Workspace.   She is slowly recovering from a double mastectomy with her daughter by her side.  

Per Sunflower Health VIP today is "appreciate yourself" day.  Go forth strong one and keep the faith ^j^

twice churched

I slept too late to make it to the tabernacle as me and Yaya call it, so I watched online.  There was a guest speaker there today from the UMC ministry at UT Martin.  He was a perfect transition for that team which consists of both children and youth programs at our church.  There is small talk and a dwindling choir.  Dakota is leaving some big shoes to fill. We have screens with the words which keeps us always looking up.  I kind of like that.  I can't see well enough to even read a hymnal.  

I got out with the intention of getting 4 things at the dolla' store and recycling my cardboard.  I went to not one but four stores looking for baby wipes.  This supply chain thing is real.   While I was at the recycle place I ran into a friend who told me that she had watched our former associate live stream from Memphis.  Wade Cox was such a nice kid when he came to us, and I mean that literally.  He built a strong youth program and even gave me and LP a ride one day when I locked my keys in the car.  On his departure for theology school, a parent council was set up to meticulously transition our youth by a bunch of folks who admired him.  It was all planned out and the senior at that time refused to meet with them and squished all of Wade's hard work.  Said senior died on the golf course.  Lauren was right on the cusp of being able to be a part of that program but the tribe that followed lost all of the kids.  We went through several and it makes me happy to see Emily and Tori do such amazing jobs.

I'm off to order a case of baby wipes!   Keep the faith ^j^

that snowy night

My mother's hip broke while she was at church one day right before Christmas.  The nurse from her home away from home had taken her and Lauren was en route to meet her.  She didn't fall and break it....just a snap and she fell.  Osteoporosis.  She was rushed to the local ER and admitted.  I'm a conservative kind of gal when it comes to treatment so I asked the surgeon if pinning was an option and he said yes.  About a month later the pin smooth fell out of that chalky bone and caused one heck of a big pain.  I hauled her in a wheelchair into and out of the doc's office for surgery #2.  It lasted five hours but she recovered quickly and was on the mend.  Then she had this strange belly pain which a CT confirmed was a ruptured diverticulum.  In spite of multiple heavy duty antibiotics, her white count continued to climb.  The turning point was when my friend Jimbo said she would not survive another surgery.  And he told her that like good doctors will.  Hospice was called in and Tommy headed out from Virginia.  Lauren was working the graveyard shift at the place where Mama had stayed and during the night before her death it snowed.  Like big time.  BG got there and snoozed on the couch by her all day.  Me and Bubba worked and Tommy arrived late in the day.  Mom was peaceful and not in pain so he went out to eat and then came back to lay on the same couch where Lauren had been.  Sometime in the wee hours of the morning, he called me and frantically told me she had died.  As he told it, he was a bit awake and saw her point up and then cease to breathe.  

She was still warm when I got there, Tommy was a hot mess and Millette was with us.  She gently took Mom's necklace off that held their wedding rings and fastened it onto me.  She was buried on a freezing day in January on a slope that was hard to navigate.  One of the pall bearers had told us that he couldn't be there because he would be out of town.  He wasn't listed as one.  Yet in the end, he and his wife showed and he helped carry the casket up that muddy slope.  

That was almost six years ago and I remember it like it was last week.  I am who I am because of her and Daddy, but more like him.  She was a socialite and I was not.  So be it.  She loved me like chicken ^j^

playing hardball

Well well.  It seems as if I missed the boat by two years on balance billing which went into  effect on January 1 2022.  I recently received a bill for 1966 bucks from WTH Dyersburg hospital because the facility ( at that time CHS)  refused to accept what my insurance offered leaving me with a 2500 balance.  Somebody flipped a switch somewhere and 600 dollars was knocked off leaving me with the almost 2K bill.  I have only just begun to chase this down and was given two phone numbers to help with resolution, both of which are closed for the day.  The bottom line is that the two facilities want me to pay the difference as "co-insurance".  It ain't over 'til the fat lady sings is all I'm saying.

I had a mammogram this morning which is always joyful and necessary.  I have two friends with breast cancer treatment ongoing and I've always been faithful with the screening including paps.  I will do my best to stay healthy with regular checkups and Braggs everything.  If they sell it at the health food store, it's all good.  

My ostomy advice today was to pour olive oil inside of the pouch to prevent pancaking.  Believe me, the struggle is real.  I'm happy as a clam to have a whole new box of supplies.

Ya' know what?  Y'all be bleessed ^j^

faster is better

There was a random internet outage last night that affected a lot of people, plus phones were wonky.  Of course there was a full moon.  And Mercury retrograde!   Double whammy.  Actually I read this morning that there is a huge 5G update coming via ATT and Verizon so naturally, they ignored the advice of NASA to reschedule.  It's trickle down y'all.  All carriers use their towers.

Me and Joy took a ride up to the new headquarters of Paws 2 Care at Nauvoo Pet resort.  These folks are giving every thing they have to take care of the furbabies.  I think it's my calling in a way.  Oscar won't mind sharing me.  I've watched this rescue operation for several years and they have it down an art.  Ms. Joy will love it :)

Y'all be halfway sane and please BE NICE ^j^

spiritual gifts

As we continue our study of baptism, the lay leadership of our church was presented and prayed for during today's service.  They are a diverse lot and they are taking us into 2022 and beyond as disciples.   The Methodist way is to remember your baptism and use the gifts that you have to the glory of God.  That includes all of us, not just the council and team leaders.  It reminded me of that song "I am the church, you are the church we are the church together!"

The blizzard did not happen and we got less than an inch which is just enough to be pretty.  It rained and blew for hours yesterday and I had a ceiling leak in yet another place which is what happens when there's a blowing rain.  I haven't been into the attic to check things out because it's so dang hard to get up there.  

Covid is rampant around here and I think I've already had it several times.  I watched Dr. Oz's final show as he head toward a career in politics.  He is running for a Senate seat in the Republican primary.  Why am I  surprised?  Big money buys positions.  That goes for both parties.  

Y'all keep on hanging in.  Spring will be here before you know it.  I have some friends who used to have a summer themed party every February.  There were shorts and flip flops everywhere!

We can all be something to somebody.  Every friend I have came to me in a different way.  Some go all the way back to childhood and others are made every day.  One is no different than the other when there is mutual respect and love.  

Play nice or I will hit you with a snowball ^j^

dead of winter

It's here y'all.  While I don't expect a blizzard, there will be some snow and it's cold.  The girls came today and we had a large time with the levitating ball and baby Elizabeth.  Lauren got pretty good with the ball right off.  Reaves just squealed!

  

I got word that they made it home for snuggle time.  She already has a flying fairy so I was kind of behind on that game.  Reaves sat on my lap before they left to watch Jillian and Addie while Lauren reclined.  It's our usual routine.  At least we were sharing devices :)  She knows how to hit the space bar to go forward. And she can count to 20 plus she's cute as hell.  We danced today to random music which is something we all love.  It soothes the savage beast.

Y'all stay warm and love the one you're with ^j^

one dog night

I have, on occasion, slept in a queen size bed with three canines if it was really cold.  It's so nice to be all cuddled together for warmth.  I'm about to go postal on all these people who are dumping puppies in ditches.  If you have a dog or cat it is your responsibility to control the crowd.  These babies didn't ask to live under porches and in barns or to be bait for coyotes and other predators.  I know it's nature's way and all that but y'all keep your babies close and take good care of them.  They will stay with you through anything.

My dog alarm is going off so evidently Oscar is hearing something suspicious like a car passing.  Just bless him.  My friend Lorna posted a pic of her happy self propped up in a recliner following breast surgery.  Lord I miss those folks.

Don't forget that Monday is Betty White Day and act accordingly ^j^

customer service

I would like to give a huge group hug to the team at Forked Deer Connect internet service for working past normal hours to restore my connection last night.   This was the second outage over a two day period but they made it right.  It's rather unusual these days to find a business that will go above and beyond for customers.  Like the propane company that I dealt with for years.  Baker Gas and Oil  in Gates has kept me warm for 30 plus years but the supplier changed when I  moved to the cabin.  These people are out of Alamo and not much cotton.  My order was placed on Monday when I was at 20% as instructed and I am at 5% with no promise of delivery before this weekend's snowpocalypse.  "we're behind" she said.  Alrighty then.  There's your corporate mentality.  If I freeze to death I will sue you just like you threatened to do if I got somebody else to put gas in the tank.  Idiots.

Some chick flipped me a bird today just for the hell of it because I made a turn in front of her with plenty of room for her to pass safely.  Guess she had a bad day or something.  Omicron is every freaking where and all the shelves are bare at grocery stores.  It kind of reminds me of Gilead.

We are all in this together and the supply chain disruption is a big part of the problem.  A lot of people like Rand Paul are blaming Biden for our current state of affairs.  As POTUS, he inherited a huge mess which continues to grow because of the radical right.  God don't like ugly. Play nice with others.  Say your prayers. And above all, keep the faith ^j^  

stepupFedEX

As we all know our world is in a supply chain crisis/Covid epidemic/ emergency.  Personally, I don't see is as germ war China vs them.  I believe that a well meaning bunch of scientists made a mistake and the whole world has suffered for it.  Somebody didn't use gloves or broke a beaker or something.  The telling thing is that we were caught so unaware in a red hot political situation where the POTUS was being impeached for lying etc. etc.  I was pretty sick, but I do remember that part.  

One of my WWW boyfriends is Trae Crowder.  Originally from Tellico Plains TN he has moved to California because southern politics are so shitty and he WILL tell you about it in a New York minute.  By nothing short of a miracle I got gifted with a beautiful piece of art by my buddy Larry.  I told 'em I wanted the one that I had made but there was much confusion.  Anywho...this one is much nicer and I offered to give it back.  I think she has a home.

I have talked with more old friends over the past month that in the past five years.  I reach out because I realize that life is short and then you're gone  Do what Larry would do ^j^

i love you back

I was going about my business this afternoon when I got an emergency call telling me that my friend Larry was found dead today.  We go wayyyyyy back, not to Finley but we had a bond that couldn't be broken.  Every time we called each other it was "hey sexy".  I gave him the stained glass window that I made just because he loved it.  He gave me wicker furniture that he found on the curb somewhere.  We partied at the Autry house many a time.  He was a constant in my life.  So how do we move on?

By honoring who he was and the things that he loved.  Animals.  Flowers.  Artsy stuff.  An old wood cabin that became his home.  He loved having calves and cows nearby.  And decorated like a pro.   It still has not sunk in that I will never hear his voice again.  I regret not hugging him the last time I saw him.  

Such is life, and loss is hard.  I don't think that anybody who doesn't love fully can understand the pain of losing a loved one.  It is, of course, raining dreadfully washing away the remnants of the snow.  I saw a cardinal today in the driveway and didn't realize that it was Larry.  I just called that redbird Daddy ^j^

blowing in the snow

We got a God wink today in the form of a decently heavy snow.  No ice....very slushy.  That's the kind I like, ya know?   I remember once upon a time when I tried to get from my house on the hill to the cabin and got stuck in 8 inches.  I can't remember who rescued me but bless 'em.  I also remember being without a dish on a snowy day and I tied a sheet behind the car for Lauren to ride on.   That's right up there with one of the stupidest things I ever did.  

There is something magical about being surrounded by whiteness.  You can see the birds searching for food, which I provide only they don't get it yet. There are buttercups coming up all over and just waiting to get bit by the freeze.  Thank goodness no blooms yet!  That is a typical January sight.  

If you are traveling, be safe.  If you are lonely, call me.  And if you just need a friend, I'm there.  ^j^

happy hump day

Happy Wednesday to y'all!  In my world, this is hair day at Headlines.  I had to run home and change out el baggo because I was missing one important piece in my emergency kit.  It travels in my big ass purse along with other things like cough lozenges and eye drops.  I need to downsize on that deal.

It was really nice to finally tell my story.  Of course the other people who were there know the details.  My pastor and her husband turned out to be good friends because we're all on the same page.  We know the struggles.  I would like to give a bit shout out to Tara Kiddy for being my pro-bono ostomy nurse.  

We're expecting some winter weather and I say bring it on.  The first time I slide, I'm headed home. We shall see what the morning brings.  At least Reaves will get more Christmas snow!

Peace~

stomaversary

In 8 days I will mark the two year anniversary of when I almost died.  I am telling my story for a support group post here so if you've heard the details before, bear with me.  I knew I was sick with diverticulitis but had kept it half way knocked down with antibiotics.  The night that I realized it was an emergency, I drove myself to the ER to be told that I didn't have diverticulitis because my white count was normal.  No CT was ordered.  I had declined one prior to that because I was uninsured at the time.  One week later it was coming a monsoon on a Friday night and I woke up , knowing that it was do or die time and the road was flooded.  I called my brother at 6AM to take me out in his truck to ER again.  Cousin Millette took over there and stayed with me all day until I was transferred to Baptist East in Memphis.  The CT showed not only diverticulitis but a complete small obstruction that had formed an abscess.  I don't remember anything about those 11 hours that I spent in Dyersburg and faintly remember a rainy EMS drive to Memphis which is 90 miles away.  

I was there on a floor for one night until surgery could be lined up.  I woke up on a vent and was totally freaked out trying to ask Lauren what was wrong.  She said they had to hit me with propofol!  Lauren was spreading the word to everybody because it looked pretty serious and the next thing I knew two of my pastors were standing over my bed.  At first I thought I was in heaven because all these other special people were there.  Patsye got to watch me get extubated and thought it was cool.  I never even knew she was there.

I was put into a room then on a routine post-op floor right next to the nurse's station on 3L of O2 and a shit ton of other drugs.  All in all, I was on oxicillin, flagyl and levaqiun for 3 weeks.  I spent a week in a rehab facility and it was the most miserable time of my life.  My release to the nursing home was delayed by MLK day and insurance folks being off.  I made several good friends there in CNAs who liked to engage with somebody who was actually able to talk.  Same for PTs and nurses. They had just been bought and it was all kinda' wonky.

Home health worked with me for two  months because I had a wound vac and didn't know the first thing about changing a bag.  The nurse at Baptist showed me how but I had anesthesia brain.  I still struggle with it sometimes.  Reversal was a really risky option because I had parts of both intestines removed.  Would it reach?  Hmmm.  Also, Covid. It ia an elective procedure and as all know the hospitals are full of you know what.  They are overwhelmed.  

I watched all this start from a hospital bed in Memphis along with Koby Bryant's death and Trump's impeachment.  I remember after one sleepless night watching a beautiful sunrise over my window and I knew it was my mother telling me to be brave.  It happened on the date of her death.

Y'all hang in there.  Things could be worse ^j^

snow day

Yesterday it was 78 degrees here after a long night of monsoons.  When I got up this morning it was sleeting and 31 and it is now 29 with a forecast low of 19.  Holy Moly.  I thought about doing virtual church and God kicked me in the ass and told me to at least give it a try.  Got dressed, tried out the steps and it wasn't cold enough to be icy yet so I headed to the church house.  And boy am I glad I did.  When we left one of the greeters said "Look outside!"  It was snowing the most beautiful little shower I've ever seen.  Magical!

This Sunday and next are dedicated to the two sacraments that we observe in the UMC.  Communion and Baptism.  Yeah, we do other things like getting ashed for Lent and stuff like that but it's not really a sacrament.   The community of all those who partake of the Lord's supper together, she explained, is both a lateral and vertical thing.  You are communing laterally with fellow Christians and vertically with Jesus.  I never thought about it that way.  I do know when I went to that rail I prayed hard for my girls and Lorna and Kim.  Our mission moment came from a Lakeshore alumni who ended up being a counselor.  She told tales of how the kids there would cry on her shoulder about how bad things were at home yet woke up praising the Lord and becoming a community of believers.  I guess I've been a counselor to a lot of Lauren's friends who had less than wonderful families.  They were always welcome here even if just to vent or get a hug.  I am THE hugmeister!  

Be well y'all.  And always look up ^j^