runnin' down a dream

My boundaries are getting tested at every turn and lately I'm glad to have 'em. Today at the sawmill was a snooze and I was so pissed that the electricity was out when Charles Osgood came on. Of course I taped it but....One of the things that my therapist Bev used to be curious about was my addiction to self help books. She asked me one time "But what do you read for fun?" That was way before I discovered Stephanie and Lula and I was totally stumped over it. At that point in my life I need John Bradshaw, Scott Peck and Melody Beattie to help me keep it in the middle of the road. Hard work ya'll. You gotta wanna'. Tonight is the premiere of Dr. Drew's rehab and we're hooked on that kinda thing, especially with him. Dr Phil got us headed in that direction ;) Most of what they've televised is celebrity stuff but I feel that more random folks will be showing up like the ones who clog up our ERs with their drug seeking ways. I can honestly say that's one thing I've never done. Unless it's a kidney stone or heart attack, I'll tough it out on the hill with OTC. I know how addicts work.

Substance abuse in this country is a huge problem due to the gigantic pharm industry and lack of funding for mental health. It is much more profitable to treat mental health issues with drugs than to get down to the root cause of an individual's pain. Factor in that most people at the poverty level can't even afford a PCP and depend on state and federally funded groups for treatment and there ya go. A whole helluva lot of depressed people with a lot of justified anger. Hell, I've got a good job and I'm mad! I'm not talking about the straight up addicts who are on a fast track to the morgue. I'm speaking to intervention in the current generation of children who are entirely too preoccupied with their own little selves. Honey Boo Boo, my ass. This is particularly applicable to the state of Tennessee where the largest city with a rich history has turned into a whole lot of ghetto.

I do not believe in entitlements to those who are working the system on my dime. Yet that includes nobody that reads this blog because they're too busy hustling the government or the local church secretary or whomever. I believe that the electronic medical record is way past due and was held back by people who had a huge financial stake in the upgrade. Same with a cure for cancer other than chemo and radiation. Don't tell me all of these big medical centers with research centers can't figure it out. Preventive care is where it's at, bottom line. What wasn't even considered a public health issue 25 years ago has turned into a condition that I must monitor with twice yearly PAP smears. Meanwhile, hospitals are filled with foreign doctors as hospitalists tending to the steady flow of chronically ill patients who live in the immediate area. Much of those health problems could be solved through education and intervention but, well. That doesn't MAKE money.

Mammograms should be free, or at least less than the light bill. Early detection is imperative for that particular form of the disease. So is family history and lifestyle. Because of my love for beer malt beverages I'm at a bit of a higher risk and also they're kinda on the big side. Which is why I faithfully turn up every year where my friend Martha squishes the devil out of the girls. I've seen the alternative and it ain't pretty, except for Cindy, bless her heart. My friend Sue has told me umpteen stories about her and when I met her it was as if we were lifelong buddies. Cute.As.Pie.

We've cooked two nights in a row so it's time to wash dishes and eat leftovers. I'm ALMOST through all the frames I brought up to clean and my partner in the barnwood deal is about to be done with his current project so there's hope for Christmas presents yet. It's not Halloween yet so my dressing isn't even beginning to be in the freezer, but the bread is by golly. All it needs is some chicken stock and fixings. It's my yearly goal to beat Kay to the punch with that task.

This is birthday time for my nephew, niece and brother. I rarely mention them because they're all copyright protected and whatnot. I did pin the boy's pic on our bulletin board at work where the ancient memories and current happies are posted. His little sister is a smiling angel with clouds of chocolate curls surrounding her dimpled face. And their father is my baby brother, as close as siblings can be all those miles apart. There was a period of years when we were in respective therapy that Bev just said "You folks need to follow your dreams." And we did.

Off for a couple of days here and looking forward to it. I may have to work next Saturday just to make it up on my check but what the heck. It's not like Sugardaddy is lurking around tempting me with offers. Me and a friend were talking about boyfriends today in the dark ( long story ) and we both decided we wanted one when we want one but then want him to go away for awhile. That's what cougars do, ya know?

Keep the faith ^j^