Miracles blessings and gratitude. These are the things that have helped me through the past few days. I see the fear and fatigue in the eyes of others and know that I am not alone. Sawmill was busy again and we knew the lull wouldn't last long, didn't we? There's no shortage of sick folks, ever. At least we haven't had an Ebola patient yet! The Cadi is dead in the water (still) up in Triple T's parking lot so the BG and me are sharing the trusty old Camry for now. She picked me up after work today and we stopped by the home to see Mom and Aunt Granny. I've figured out that when two of the family members show up at once she sees it as an intervention to keep her there forever. Gots'ta have that nerve medicine when in strange surroundings with other folks. She hates it and wants to die, so she is killing herself slowly by refusing to eat. There is no more helpless feeling than seeing someone you love do that to themselves. It's not the home really...she just doesn't want to eat. BG has never seen that side of her and neither had I until recently and it makes me more determined to not die like that. She misses Daddy and we all work and he's in his zone and it's just a big old mess. They want to go back to the way things were and that won't happen. I can totally relate.
It's cold and the roads are already salted for tomorrow's precip which may or may not be icy. I'll be saving lives and whatnot and again on Monday and until I drop and they step over my cold dead body. We've been wanting to watch Tammy since it came out in July and last night was pure theater in a warm room with several dogs and a mother daughter combo bonding at our best. I'm pretty sure I missed not only my pap smear appointment but also my release from the ortho doc to "full duty." Hey..I've been busy. Don't voicemail me about a blip on your calendar. To get the pap smear that I really need due to HPV cervical dysplasia,I have to come up with a 40 buck co-pay plus pay the reference lab. At this point, it's nowhere near in the budget. Finance talks will continue until I'm able to maintain some liquidity.
The project is limping along, mostly because I'm worn the hell out with life and can't see the forest for the trees. I did get a Kickstarter invite to check out an opportunity for food blog but I'm kind of leery of that sort of thing because it's kind of the net equivalent of giant publishing houses so we shall see. The talent is here, it's up to me to make it work for my benefit. Lorna told me to "tighten it up" and she's one who knows. I should have one more meeting with our teacher to hammer out the details. And to think a Republican governor made all that happen.
Peace, love and rock'n'roll to all y'all and your mama and them ^j^
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