who is my neighbor?

I had plans to go to church this morning but had an ostomy emergency that kept me home and watching online.  It is the Lenten season and a time in desert for many of us who believe in Jesus.  I gave up political discourse this year because I think it has become toxic to me and my world view.  Mary Beth continued her sermon by asking us who are the most despicable people that we have trouble loving. If you know me at all, you can pretty much guess who my go to folks are and they are not many.  I forgive, over and over again.  I do not hold a grudge for very long. I get over it and move on, and bless their hearts.  Loving to laugh and be peaceful are my major personality traits.  However, I am a rebel when it comes to human rights and whatnot.  Like a dog with a bone, if you will.

I watched a video this morning featuring the people who are in prison in the state of Oregon.  They have the opportunity, unlike in many states, to get paid for working inside of the facility to earn money or points for perks.  Many of them are putting their wages back for starting a new life after release.  It keeps them going and adds to the economy of our country by 1000%.  I also watched a piece about how Chintatowns all over America are dealing with the tariffs and how that affects their businesses and communities.  The same can be said for other countries hit by the extreme tariffs.  This will trickle down within a few weeks to we the people of the USA.  

As for me, I will doctor my stoma according to what seems to be a blockage in the works. Drink more water and keep changing bags.  Thankfully I have a new supply but only one belt that was soiled and is now drying on the box fan.  I will order more now that I have a bit of money.  I tried to do that with my usual supplier but was told that the shipment would be held up because of that "new" item.  Girl, please.  

I see my PCP in the morning and I have lots of questions.  Like "

why is my left ear hurting like a mofo?" What is my creatinine and GFR?  Last month they were stable but you never know.  What I want is a PCP who will monitor me and not send me out to 10 specialists with a 30 dollar co-pay.  I have canceled several because I didn't have the money.  I don't think these PCPs exist anymore because, well you know.  They don't want to take responsibility for something that can be construed as not covering their asses.  

My sin of the day is envy of those folks who can just hop in their car and go to their places and afford to eat out once a week.  But I am working on that during this season.  Sorry this has not been an inspirational post.  I'm not feeling it right now but there is always tomorrow.  I haven't seen Reaves in about five months.  Lauren is with her now and I'm glad but I sure could use a hug from dat' baby.  Just saying ^j^

rachel

She is a truly amazing woman.  I first met her when she was slinging food at the four points gas station and gave me half off on sausage and biscuits after 10am.  Our families are connected over decades through parents and grandparents.  She has always been a journalist and invited me in when she became general manager of the Dyersburg State Gazette.  There were zero reporters other than her when Brandon Hutcheson left and he was later replaced by William Northcutt.  My job was as a "stringer" meaning that I pitched stories to Rachel and then followed up with interviews that were eventually published as "spotlights. "  Some of those folks were Will Bird, Joe Wolfe, Athena Goodall Reed and Jimmy Hester.  With each interview I was introduced to the missions and goals of local people in our community.  I learned a lot from Rachel and the folks that I talked with and made lifelong friends.  As a contributor to SHE magazine I met some new BFFs including Dawn Gordon.  Our interview was at Green Frog which was not a good choice because the music plays all the time.  My interview with Casey Hipps took place here at the cabin though I had known she and her history from visiting her little take out place next to the gigantic yard sale close to Four Points.  Rachel and I were partners in a side venture that began as a pipe dream from a guy who hired us for three months to launch Pioneer Life.  We didn't make any money, but we tried our best.

Rachel is a very talented photographer who does private session for all sorts of events like weddings, graduations and anything in between.  That is called Pioneer also.  She did a photog session with me and Lauren and Reaves a few years ago when Reaves was, shall we say, a sassy young girl.  There were buttercups and iris all around while we posed and whatnot.  Great memories. My favorite is one of all us girls sitting on the front porch steps.  These are my girls.  

I have effectively taken myself out of the political arena into my own life.  Day by day, nobody knows what is up with the POTUS and his minions so I won't worry until a special ed teacher in Munford shoots himself before class.  Which was yesterday.  Trump et al can take a chainsaw to the budget and they will.  I have witnessed many "almost" government shutdowns in my life. The worst was when LP was attending UTM for a social work degree and the money for tuition was not there when she showed up for class.  Mind you, social work is a thankless job these days.  Things look bleak for the least of these.

Resist ^j^

c

(new to me) ride

Once again we have transportation and, by the grace of God it is a Toyota which is what I wanted.  Bubba and I bought it from a holiness preacher who sells cars on the side and preaches "only from the Bible."  No liturgy, old hymns and lotso' long sermons.  His somewhat younger wife was making spring flower arrangements for the church.  She had to show him where to sign just like the people at the bank did with me.  I have been without AREDS for a few weeks and I can tell it.  

A friend of mine has been unusually vocal about politics lately and said today that he is giving up the rant for Lent.  Me too Tony.  It does nothing but raise my BP when things are totally out of my control.  It changes every day so keeping informed is important but bitching about it is fruitless.  God is in control and I do not believe He is happy right now with the good old USA.  

I am so grateful right now to have Lauren here with me to help with things.  She can see and I cannot, very well.  She got me some new readers at the 'gentral because I lost my good ones but I think I need to revisit the eye doctor for something stronger.  

The Lenten season is a time for reflection on the things that keep us from God and our faith in Him.  I did the ashing with sage yesterday afternoon but didn't go anywhere.  That was just between me and Jesus.

Y'all stay happy and healthy and safe.  Please be kind ^j^

in like a lion

Whoa!  If you are driving a top heavy vehicle in the south right now, bless your heart.  Winds up to 40 mph woke all of us in the middle of the night.  When they come from the west, the whole house shakes.  Rosie came in and out all during the night and was as confused as we were.  They bAt some point she slept next to me.  And Lauren.  And visited the crazy Siamese that lives under the house.  That dude creeps me out.  One crossed eye and a very aggressive  cry that sounds like a crazy cat.  We have watched him come and go under the house and tried to invite him in only.  Dayum..that dude sprayed all over the Christmas tree.  I know, I should have had it in the attic by now.  I did the sign of the cross with sage ashes.  Can't see too well but ... It was not last year's palm branches but I think Jesus understands.  That's what I love about he and his tribe.

Lent these days always reminds me of Brother John Kilzer and brother John Fisher.  Well actually, all of the ministers that have been a part of my life.  The first ones I remember are Hank Russell and Reginald Mallet.   There were many others like Cecil and Dell and David and what's his name.  Dude died on the golf course.  Back in the day our youth minister decided to go into seminary.  He laid a very well thought out plan to the council of parents and then went on his way.  When the council convened, the plan was not available.  Nada.  Locked up.  

That was when Lauren's group began to wander through the desert.  They are a big class of about 30 and they made many a SS teacher walk out.  Not me.  We went to the cemetery one Easter Sunday and talked about life and death.  We parked the church van right by my family's plot and had a sit down.  One other time, I took an actual unit of blood from work just to teach about how it saves lives.  HIPPA forgive me. No kid was harmed by this event ;)  Hopefully some of them learned something.

Y'all keep the faith.  And walk against the wind ^j^

 

ponzi scheme?

I think not, Elon.  When you start meddling with SS you are asking for economic collapse.  We paid into SS and Medicare all of our working lives while you were out there doing whatever it is that you do.  The tariffs will do us in first and prices will rise to where nobody can afford to eat or buy gas.  Not to mention what it will do to farming in this country.  You bought your way into being Trump's BFF and we all know it.  He helped you and in turn you helped him and all of us are going to suffer.  What will you do with all of us when we become homeless in America?  Concentration camps are probably on the table as an option.  Or worse.  We will starve to death like those in Gaza.

Am I being paranoid?  Nope.  I pay attention to everything that is going on there is an underground movement to resist what you are doing.  I will not be watching the speech tonight because I cannot afford "real" TV.  I get my news second hand and after the fact.  I am really surprised that you did not make an appearance in the Oval office during the smackdown of Zelenskyy.  I guess you were busy with your chainsaw slashing federal spending.  Not to worry.  They managed to fracture our relationships with our allies without you.  I have never been so ashamed of being an American.  

Not much faith in the world today.  Sorry...you can't always look on the sunny side ^j^

let's make a deal

I have never ever seen anything like the bullying that went on in the oval office yesterday.  It's as if Trump is still a reality show host only he's playing against all of us.  "You're fired!"  Which is exactly what he told President Zelenskyy.  What was supposed to be a meeting concerning a mineral deal turned into a shouting match that, like a train wreck, you can't look away from.  I watched in horror while the leaders of our country treated an ally like a bad school boy.  He knew what he was walking into yet he kept his cool,  and when he managed to get a word in edgewise, spoke thoughtfully and respectfully.  He sat in a defensive posture position with arms crossed and, took the beating.  So much for the mineral deal, huh?  Plan WWIII will be for Putin to break the ceasefire and seize the bounty for himself.  If Trump thinks for a minute that he will share because they have "been through so much together"  he is stupider than I thought.  Putin will throw him under the bus in a heartbeat.  They are two of a kind.

The most pathetic thing, to me, is that all these Republicans are sitting back and letting he and Elon run the show.  Because they're scared.  Well, so are we y'all.  So are we.  I come from a middle class family that was usually GOP voters.  And I never really paid attention to politics until I watched Nixon's resignation at my high school.  Watergate and Vietnam.  Those changed my views.  I was only in elementary school when JFK was murdered but I knew it was a bad thing.  The rest is history.  One of my high school teachers was an expert on that killing in Texas.  He had a room full of evidence that Oswald was framed by his own government.  Zapruder film.  Google it.

I have rant days and I have days where I feel the grace of God.  Most of my spiritual beliefs are based on helping others who are less fortunate.  My home church is a haven for those who might not feel welcome because of their life choices.  That is exactly what Jesus would do.  Without the support of friends and family during this whole wreck ordeal, we would have been screwed.  And I will pay that forward.  And we still have no car!  It's a process, you know?  You have to (get your brother to) kick tires and do test drives.  He gives Lauren rides to work and brings me whatever I ask for.  We are currently researching Lyft and Uber in the area.  When LP was in Jackson they were everywhere.  

I pray that you are all blessed with enough.  That's all I have ever really asked for and the good Lord has provided.  Faithful here ^j^

patience

We all seem to lack that at some point.  I am as guilty as anybody wanting things right damn now.  When you have no way to get from point A to point B it can be frustrating.  Bubba and I test drove a nice car yesterday and took it to Les and his crew at Lake Road.  About the time we pulled up, it started making a strange noise.  The ride from Newbern to Dyersburg was flawless.  It drove well and was in great shape.  Dude offered 1K off the price to fix it only we don't know what that is other than "something" going out.  We passed.  A friend of his goes to auctions all the time and is actively looking for what we want, which is a Toyota.  Until I bought the cursed Ford, I had driven Camrys since the year Lauren was born in 1984.  My parents bought, and wrecked, several Toyotas.  They are reliable IMHO.  

Anywho, we have been blessed with friends and neighbors to get to where we need to be.  I have cancelled a lot of appointments because of lack of transportation so that is my number one goal after finding a vehicle.  Dentist, GP, nephrologist and cardiologist name a few.  

The stray Siamese somehow got into the house last night and sprayed (again) in the bathroom.  Doors shall remain closed now except to let Rosie in and out.  It was just so dang NICE yesterday!  I spent a lot of time on the porch which is where I am headed right now.  Y'all take advantage and enjoy.  And always keep the faith ^j^

doge me

Can y'all ever remember a time when things were so uncertain in this country?  Oh yeah.  There was that time we all moved to America as immigrants from Europe and whatnot.  My family is a blend of Stafford from England and Agee from France.  I know this because my parents did their homework and kept the history alive.  There are crumpled paper documents somewhere that prove it.  Daddy searched for his missing grandfather Joe Stafford until the day he died.  Joe just took off and run, as I understand it.

It's a HUGE basketball night in West TN and I am rooting for my favorite player Lizzie.   This young woman is amazing in more ways than one.  I have watched she and her brother Thomas grow up in our church.  Her entire family has served in one way or another as part of the ministry of DFUMC.  It's what Jesus would do.

What about this weather y'all?!  The doors are wide open here and the central unit is off.  It's warm enough to not wear a sweater and sit in the sun like a turtle on a log.  Enjoy because it will soon be hot as hades.

Love ya' like chicken ^j^

the puzzle

When you have no way to go, it can be frustrating.  You depend on others to get you to where you need to be.  We have been fortunate in that respect.  Friends and neighbors have helped with getting us from here to there.  I don't go much of anywhere but I did eat a shit ton of fried food at the CBG annual lunch.. I watched farmer after farmer fill their pans with mudpuppies and eat 'em like caviar.  As for our table, we ate fish and the trimmings.  We had a mixed table of Samaria Bend folks plus a couple of other crawfish eaters.  They save the pans ya know?

Great weather here!  The snow is gone and it's hovering in the 50s at night.   The birds are all happy when the crows aren't making noise.  So annoying.  They have picked the fields clean of every bit of last year and still at it.  In the morning though, those little wild birds wake me up and sing.  My great grandmother Ethel had parakeets and whatnot in her house on Pate.  When I was a kid I was amazed at how she managed to keep the wires clean.  Caged birds, if you will. She would take them to the Methodist church for the Easter sunrise service. Lent is a sacred time for me and mine.  I pray it is for you as well.

Tomorrow's  agemda includes a ride for grocery pickup and to get Lauren to and from work.  It will happen if it is meant to be. At this point, I don't even care.  It is what it is.

Y'all stay faithful and true ^j^ 

the bait

People who have a one sided view of our current situation will do anything to pick a fight.  I have several friends who are like that.  I never go trolling on what they post because I'm not made that way.  If that's what they believe I will never change their minds.  Yet they never cease to come back at me and my opinions calling me things like stupid and uninformed.  Several of my friends will get into the fray with these folks and they get insulted too.  One of them, a very cool younger dude, posted this the other day in the midst of a long thread attacking my beliefs.  "It makes my blood boil to see these people laughing at your good faith."  I usually brush the trolls off and rarely take the bait even if they come onto MY personal page attempting to make themselves feel better and more powerful.  That sad thing is that they really believe all this crap.  

Hey, I get it.  Often a new president will blame the past administration for the problems they inherited.  That's part of the job, ya' know?  It serves no purpose to mean tweet those from the past because we have big problems in the now.  That is a weakness in and of itself when looking for a way forward.  The past is the past.....let it go.  Focus on the problems at hand and don't insist that your way is the right way.  By executive order, no less.  Trump et al are going way too fast and having to backtrack a lot which is good.  But it's only because people are finally standing up to the bully tactic.  Federal employees who have, or will lose their jobs, are standing up.  People at town halls are angry with their elected representatives for throwing them under the bus.  It will take a bit of a revolution but I pray that the forces for good will prevail instead of us ending up hanging on the wall in Gilead.  We may all end up in Canada which will, never ever be the 51st state.  

The car thing is still up in the air.  If they don't show me some mercy I will have to turn the rental in tomorrow with no check and no vehicle.  My friends have offered us rides to where we need to go which is mostly work for Lauren.  She is driver in chief now because of my vision.  I refuse to do what my parents did and let pride get in the way of my safety.  "You are not alone" says Matthew.  And I feel it y'all, seriously.  Keep the faith ^j^

see you in court

And all of this is about transgender athletes.  If you are not up to date, check out the governor's conference where the governor of Maine, a "liberal state" refused to comply with an NCAA ban.  Umm, excuse me?  Do we not have bigger fish to fry.  Oh yes, then we gut the senior leadership at the department of defense.  That will give Putin a good chance to expand his agenda.  

The king of our country has achieved 34% of the Project 2025 agenda in just a month, thanks to a bunch of spineless GOP followers.  I do not believe that any of them will get it until it trickles down and affects them personally.  Which could happen sooner, rather than later.  I can't wrap my mind around what is happening and I am scared for us.  If you look beyond what is happening in the US it is creepy how Musk is trying to handle Europe and saluting.  He is using his influence in Germany and their political climate.  Who does he think he is?  

Oh yeah, the king's BFF.  I am almost 70 and can not remember a time in my life that I was so concerned about our rights and freedoms.  Us baby boomers have seen a lot in our lives, enough to know when something ain't right.  Yet we sit here waiting to be the next victim of a corrupt government.  Trolls don't actually read blogs so I think I'm safe in putting my beliefs out there.  At least until some nut job decides to kill me for them.

Not a great day for faith here.  No settlement from the wreck and rental goes back Monday.  We will need rides after that to get to where we need to go.  What I would give for a good horse right now!  Nah.  I'd break a hip.

We are all in this together for better or worse.  Be kind and don't screw your neighbor ^j^

tell it

Lauren and I share this living room space until it's time for me to go to bed.  She does her thing in one spot and I do mine in another.  We occasionally hear each others' phone calls and internet favorites and laugh our asses off.  It's a three way kind of social media deal.  We have formed a bond through comedy, true crime and all sorts of other things on TikTok which she uses.  And YouTube, which I use.  Often there are competing things going on at the same time.  UCMTSU.  Meanwhile, Rosie the cat travels here and there to snooze on one of us when she's not terrorizing the poor snow birds.  

I am in active mode on a car search with whatever I get from the cursed Ford Escape.  One of the saddest days of my life was schlepping through the rain at Lowery's lot to get our stuff out.  Which wasn't much and it's still in bags in the rental.  Gotta' turn that in on Monday so THAT will need to be cleaned out.  Plus gas added to get to a half a tank  Anything is possible at the point when you are living on the edge.

It is what we do around here, the Staffords.  We are a tough breed.  The snark is heavy and the intentions are always on the positive side.  I miss them dearly, but then there are so many others.  Like Patti.  I talked with her hub today and he sounds lost as a goose, bless his heart.  I would be too.  That's a lot of years together on the golf course or anywhere there is a shared passion.  

Bubba brought a yummy casserole last night which I sampled today.  Good job bro!  We share food all the time because we like to experinent with cooking.  I need to take a dish to our youth director's baby shower on Sunday.  Our congregation will provide, I'm sure.  My offering will be brownies :)

Y'all stay warm out there.  It's all about keeping the faith and moving forward ^j^

the birds

We woke up this morning to a bunch of birds on the back porch, two of whom got into the house.  Now, this has happened before, but not in 20 degree weather.  As it turns out, the solution is to shut all doors inside, turn the lights off and open the doors to the light.  One was a bright red cardinal and the other was some little bitty that went out first.  I truly believe the spiritual meaning of all that which is either *sign of imminent death* or good luck and blessings.  I choose number two because I am an optimist.

The  maga crowd trolls are out in full force on FB today telling me I am stupid and not listening to facts.  Um..hello.  I am listening and reading while the rest of you follow blindly.  Once again, I am a conservative liberal.  When it comes to money, I say spend less of our taxpayer dollars, but do it in a smart and legal way.  Appointing young adults to do your bidding when it comes to federal research is not a good idea unless you are one of Musk's cronies.  I mean, seriously.  And there goes DJT trying to entice us with some random return on what DOGE saves.  Honey, please.  If it were only the truth.

I received a random phone call yesterday from United Healthcare trying to offer me "free money."  We talked for a bit and I shared the fact that I am not comfortable with sharing my red white and blue card with anybody, including Musk.  Dude said "This has nothing to do with Musk!"  Yeah, right.  He already has my number as well as my SS account number, plus my age and health history.  Those kids are mining the federal database for info on anybody other than those who will receive a huge tax break from the administration's policies.  Tax breaks for the rich.  What a novel idea.

I did not vote for this, yet my vote didn't count.  There are so many other things in the mix like world peace and sucking up to powerful leaders like Putin and the other world leaders.  Got bless Zelensky for standing up for his people.  Putin will play hard ball until he gets what he wants which is shameful.  Remember the movie way back then about Russia?  So many movies like that.  Was that propoganda?

I am as confused as everybody else.  The playbook changes day by day and nothing that I see is anywhere remotely what Jesus would do. Or whomever your higher power is.  We are inclusive here.  

Hug somebody soon or you might miss out.  Use your brain to figure out what's up and for God's sake don't drink the Koolaid ^j^

repeat

Let us all hold hands and pray for those who are affected by an inconvenient early spring rain and snow event.  This farm out here is surrounded by the Forked Deer river which runs all around West tn from north to south. Then there's the lake up there close to the big muddy close to Reelfoot. 1812.  It's a real thing!  That lake is home to many fish houses and lotso wetland.  I would love to see the swampy part with a good guide.  

One of the signature things at Reelfoot is the cypress stumps.   The handrail to my attic is made of those, but from here.  I have never NOT called this cabin home.  Even when I ran away to college or moved up on the hill, this place is where we grew up.  And we live here now, once again.  My dear friend Patti died yesterday and I had the big ugly cry for quite some time.  We are sooo much alike.  

I had a kind of snippy experience with a practitioner yesterday where I started spilling my guts and cute ass girl told me on the way out "Everybody's got something."  I don't know what hers is but prayers are up.  I know dear.  You are young and traveling to work and whatnot.  So are the old folks.  I saw quite a few being brought in by caregivers.  LP sat in the car the whole time.  Much more comfy that the waiting room ;)  I was in and out within 2 hours and I will take that and praise God.  Life happens one miracle at a time.

My faith helps me to believe that there is something better than a state controlled media and whatnot.  But it happened before and it can happen again if everybody just says WTF and lays down.  I will not, by any means.  I know what's going on in the world right now from the few news agencies who are allowed to post.  Gulf of Mexico?  Hell yes. 

I can't really expect any sort of miracle at any time.  They happen in the most subtle of ways.  Sometimes you don't even realize it until way later....that something you saw as a tragedy can turn into something better.  At least that's my experience.  I almost died twice from abcessed diverticulitis.  Once was on a 2am run to the ER for what I knew was going on, only to be told by a doc there that I didn't have that because my WBC was normal.  When he failed to order a CT I should have pitched a fit in pain right then and there.  Only I was already getting septic and didn't know it.  "No scan for you!" said the ER nazi.  The rest is history.  Oh..and

the reason that I almost died that first time was driving over the hill like a bat out of hell on loose gravel. 

I could see the ditchbank facing me and said to myself "Oh Lord, this is it."  I wasn't really scared but instead grabbed that wheel and got us back on the road.  I don't remember the ride home.  I reckon God got me there.  Ten days later, it all got real.  But enough about that.   Today's top story is the weather.

We got some snow last night and it's pretty dang cold at the moment.  Thanks be to Baker Gas and Oil for keeping us warm out here at the cabin.  These guys deliver come rain or snow or shine and always take time to chat.  I don't think Adam will be chatting with us today but if he does, we will offer him something warm to drink.  One time Butch delivered to us on the hill on Christmas Eve.  In the snow!

These are the kind of people that you realize, much later on, are miracles in your life.  I owe everybody and their brother but I am making amends by going to them face to face to explain where I'm at on upcoming payments.  I broke down and cried with one of my creditors which is not like me.  I think I had just had enough of life at the moment and he was the lucky one to have me for a little cryfest.  What made it so special is that he never wavered and did not scold.  He heard me.

Car settlement process is slowly happening.  We still have a rental but ain't nobody going anywhere.  Maybe tomorrow.  When we receive the money, which will be a hot minute, we have to find another vehicle that is in the budget.  LP and I have had two cars donated to us in our lifetimes.  One was a snazzy old Caddy from my friend John Yarbro.  The other was one that Lauren inherited from a friend in Jackson.  Lots of love in both of those actions.  If you can't get around, you can't work.  I took Mama and Daddy to church many a time in old that old Caddy.  It's what Zubrovka wanted for them.

We have milk and bread and TP so we are more fortunate than many.  And I think that the backwater has stabilized.  Somebody is shooting at blackbirds out there right now which is fine with me.  It allows the pretty birds to feed without being hated on.  

ever''body got sompin'

If this blog reads sort of wonky it's because my eyes are still dilated from the exam with a retina specialist.  Minimal change but he had "the talk" with me about driving.  The very same one me and Bubba and the doctors and the  cops did with Mama and Daddy.  The very last wreck was a hit and run by Daddy at none other than the Samaria Bend Road crossing on Highway 51,  Speed limit 55.  LP got slammed there as a teenager riding with somebody else.  They fly!

Daddy was soooooo mad about those keys.  Bubba was in the woods somewhere with a timber guy so I got to be the bad kid.  He gave it up pretty. easily being the stubborn sort that he was.  As for me?  I am just grateful that I have family members who watch out for me and my safety.  Bubba's' favorite phrase is either "one of these days" when I don't answer in 3 rings , or "Don't break a hip on those steps."  Alrighty then.

I found that spending less time with the news this morning kind of gave me a bit more happiness.  I can't change it, only God can.  And not that fake golden idol one.  Everybody is an efficiency expert in their own mind.  As for me?  I'm about a C-.  Try as I may I can't just keep it up.

We shall see how kind people want to be right about now.  South Dyersburg is flooding and there is a winter storm warning.  Tye police have it shut off  all the way through the chicken store area.  I remember once upon a time when my favorite grocery story floated for the last time.  That was a pretty strong headwater from the Nashville area.  Small world...and big rivers.  We had 20 minutes to get to town and back home.  Then we left the car close to the bypass in a shop parking lot, only to get a call a bit later telling us it was about to be swalled up.  That was the "trusty" old Camry.  I shall not purchase another Ford.  Ever.  I'll stick with the imports.  That Camry got me through many a flood down at the end of Pecan Lane.  One morning I had to be at work before daylight and all I could see was water.  In the headlights!  I told her I wouldn't  be there until the light was better.  And I prolly got written up.

I am using this time of hibernation,  if it happens, to get my life in order somewhat.  My old ass doesn't deal well with complicated things like wrecks.  You are at the mercy of the insuring company which can be tricky.  In this case, both parties were insured by the same company.  Thus, I have been dealing with HIS adjustor.  Same claim number.  I've been jumping through hoops to get the documents to them regarding the new transmission.  

There are lots of people in my prayers today.  You are next ^j^

is he the one?

Mary Beth's sermon this morning was a comparison of the stories in all the different gospels about his relationship with John the Baptist.  I was supposed to be liturgist but *sick* so my friend Jay stepped up and did  a much better job that I would have with reading the Gospel.  MB talked about the timeline including John the Baptist and Jesus and offered a different version.  John was possibly imprisoned at the time of Jesus' baptism.  Picture this:  John can't know about all the things that Jesus had done to prove himself as our Messiah.  He was in JAIL.  Sooo...John's disciples visited him in jail and told him the stories.  He sent them back to Jesus with the question "Are you really the one?"  I can relate to that kind of curiosity because I have often felt that way myself.  In spite of experiencing miracles myself, sometimes I doubt.  Especially these days.

One of the biggest line items on the people's agenda was to get them our from under Roman occupation.  Which brings us to today in the good old USA.  Back in the days of Jesus, Jews and Christians alike were persecuted by the Roman government.  Which is pretty much happening right now.  Along with killing all the things that protect us as a world power.  I have to laugh sometimes just to get through the anxiety about what is happening here and around the world.  

The latest stupid move was to remove immigration judges because of a "a huge backup in cases."  So, you fire the ones who are doing that job?  I think not.  I will be the first to admit that I am tired of waste and fraud, especially with undocumented immigrants.  After working for over 40 years in the healthcare sector, I have seen almost every scenario where patients fall through the cracks because they have no advocate.  The current administration has no guardrails to reduce access to healthcare.  Yes, it's expensive.  And will probably become more so.  Our national forests are headed to the chopping block.  I could go on and on but I won't because it's not good for mental health.  This is where I just believe that Jesus died for us and our sins and God has a plan.  Maybe we are in the desert?  It's just a thought ^j^

farming

I grew up on a family farm that once had peonies and asparagus and other goodies that are very lovely.  Agriculture is tricky business at the very least because it is all dependent on the weather.  Too much rain is bad, especially all at once.  The rivers rise and the land is underwater until May or June.  Then you gotta' plant what's plantable and pay extra for potash because Canada supplies most of it and there's that tariff thing going on.  Canada hates us and so does Europe.  At this point in time, I don't think that our country is ready for a trade war.  Remember the Great Depression?  I have my great grandmother's ration book that was for gas, sugar and other things we depend on.  It was a total bust of the US economy and my Daddy grew up as a sharecropper's son during that time.  Thanks to Sam Reed he was able to attend UT Martin and graduate with a degree in agriculture.  His career with the USDA as a plant protection specialiust spanned decades chasing the Japanese beetle and other bugs that destroyed crops.  At the end, at the age of 55, he was able to retire due to his years of service in the Air Force.  Daddy lived every farmer's dream as both a federal ag employee and property manager.  

He was not particularly bright when it came to negotiating commission.  Five percent, If I remember correctly.  Yet we survived because of benefits for veterans and federal employees.  That stuff is gone baby gone.  Thanks Obama.  No wait, wrong one.  We all know things trickle down from DC to our individual states and our security.  The great state of Tennessee has repeatedly refused to accept money for Medicaid funding because...Hell I don't know.  That is the current administrations plan.  Pitch it all back to your states and let them deal with you.  As a red state resident, I'm not feeling really good about that.  Just a thought.

We are midway through a 48 hr monsoon.  Not sure how many inches but I think it will take us a while to dry out.  Plus there is snow coming on Tuesday night!  Yay?  It is what it is.  One day at a time ^j^

filthy rich

A nice lady named Jean came to deliver my visual aids today and she immediately reminded me of Leanne Morgan.  She didn't know who that was but she said she would find out.  There was a large print bible, big notepads and markers and lots of stick on lights with no batteries.  If anybody wants to give me a Valentine please buy me a jumbo pack of triple A batteries.  I love you for that, really.  Leanne's twin was really embarrased about that but I was just like ""never mind."  Shit happens.  She is an advocate for visually impaired people like myself in the great state of Tennessee.  We got kickass sports and colleges and whatnot.  Plus a lot of scenic places like Reelfoot Lake.  Y'all know that story right?  If not google it.  My friend Mary has suggested going with another search engine to simpllfy things.  It's just a thought, as Belle would say.  Which oddly enough how Beau did his thing.  "Well, howdy there internet people!"

She and Trae Crowder and Sean Dietrich and the lord god almighty keep me sane.  Family and friends surround me.  The sun rises and sets as always.  I rewatched "Don't Look Up"  the other day.  I imagine that it will be that way.  I hope that my eyes are not shut to science and power grabs by billionaires.  I'm probably on the bad list now.  If they don't send my SS I will catch a ride to DC and protest peacefully.  Canada is pissed and holding firm.  That is a good thing in my opinion.  Who knows about those Gulf of Mexico folks.

Anyhoo. I am trying out the toys that she brought and the best ones by far are the gooseneck lamp and stick on LEDs.  Plus a large print Bible, praise the Lort!  I still have my Daddy's life application version.  I believe it was an anniversary gift from Mama.  Has his name on it and everything.  I peridically serve as a liturgist at my home church.  When I am not up there, I sit in the pew and watch the screen as I listen to the liturgist.  It's never a perfect rendition what with all those crazy biblical names.  I don't know one from another when it comes to the Old book.  But, I'm still learning.  It's never too late^j^

fire

I have always been fascinated with fire.  Ain't nothing like burning a bunch of crap to make one feel productive.  It can also get you in big trouble in a rural area.  My daddy knew just exactly when it was time to burn the pine needles over by that tree line next to the pasture.  One year I caught the empty field on fire burning off the asparagus bed and when Daddy came to investigate he said "Don't worry.  It won't jump the road."  And it didn't, but me and Debbie Elder were out there running around with whatever we could find to whack it out.

And then there was the time I made the front page of The State Gazette for (accidentally) causing a fire in the very same field only it was full of beans.  Bubba came along with the city and county fire people and first responders.  The damage was minimal and I learned that lesson the hard way.  It must have been a slow news day because the paper had the whole thing recorded for history.  That was NOT one of my finest moments.

I have had a recurring dream spanning most of my adult life.  In the dream I am in the bathtub, only the tub is in the living room.  I don't think I am real concerned about the house being on fire around me.  It's not scary, just something that I can remember.  

In a way that is how I feel about life right now.  Everybody's got drama and it changes day by day.  I admit that I have whined and cried way too much over car problems, and I apologize to God and everybody about that.  The details involved with something like that are hard to work out when you depend on others for a ride. I still work part time and so does LP, so there's that.  

Our friend told us yesterday to remember that it's just a season and it may seem long but eventually it will morph into something different.  That's how mother nature rolls ^j^  Faith.Hope.Love.  And the greatest of these is love.

it is what it is

Well kids, it seems that the not so trusty Ford is headed to a staging area to be totaled out.  This is pretty disturbing since I have a 4K note left on the transmission replacement.  This is what Old Hoss would call *not good.  In grand scheme of what's going on in the world right now, I might not even need a car.  I am enough of a conspiracy theorist to believe that taking things one day at a time is the only way to live.  Nobody knows that tomorrow will come.  My faith gives me the strength to keep on keeping on.  I think we're all gonna' end up in boats like in Waterworld, anyway.  I have a very grim view of our future right now because, well you know.  Watching the Constitution being burned like an old American Flag is really pissing me off.  There are three branches of government listed therein which are told to work together.  Trying to abolish the judicial branch is suicide for all of us.  'It's all about checks and balances.  Otherwise it's just a kingdom.

I am a Christian yet I respect the religions and spiritual practices of everybody else.  I believe in one great big God who loves us and wants us to be at peace.  All the rest is just details.  We can argue until the cows come home but everyone has their own relationship with the higher power.  If it works for you?  Go for it.I really don't care what is happening politically right now or whose fault it is.  As I have said before, I am a centrist which means I lean left but toward the middle.  I do have some Republican in me, just not the way things are right now.

So, I did break down and watch the Musk and Trump show and my first thought was "Who the heck is that kid>>   A cute little stage prop who got shushed on natioanl TV.  He went MIA shortly after....lol  Honestly, when I watch those two together I can see why so many people listen to them.  The charisma is captivating and if I didn't know what I know I might believe it too.  It is trickling down at a very rapid pace to where the 'Merkin people are getting kinda nervous.  Well, a bunch of us.  Food prices are insane because, IMHO, corporate greed.  To get the old school bag size of crunchy Cheetos, it costs two bucks more for party size.  At the gentral'  I've been craving them like Gaga did.  Her fingers were always orange as DJT''s tan.

LP and I are hanging tight through this season.  I keep remembering Daddys words: This too shall pass.  And leave room for the spirit to work ^j^

the koolaid

I am 69 years old and have seen a lot of shit in my lifetime but nothing like what is happening right now with the federal government.  I am not an alarmist normally but this scares me to death.  Especially the part where the courts are being cut out of the process.  My neighbor has been hauling us around since we are carless and we have had many chances to talk about life.  He joined the Army in 1968 and served for 41 years beginning with Vietnam.  I shared that I was only 13 when that happened but was pissed off about it.  Thanked him for his service but, geez.   We grew up on this farm together not seeing each other as different races but as neighbors which continues to this day.  

I have no words or wisdom or encouragement today.  After watching church online I felt a bit of hope but not much.  But then, I began to count my blessings.  It's sort of a gratitude journal in my head.  I take ownership of the fact that I should have advanced my career much earlier in life and not let my job beat me down.  The patients appreciated it but corporate did not.  I was the blood bank supervisor during most of my tenure and got called onto the carpet in the CEOs office for asking a friend to speak about how blood transfusions saved her life.  He was nice about it and said just don't do it again.  Which I did not.  Live and learn.

Much of my career as a blood banker was spent working with our not for profit supplier in Jackson.  We ordered accordingly and had them as a backup when we couldn't figure it out.  A lot of techs were scared of transfusion service work because hey....you can kill somebody if you make a mistake.  Or make them sicker, at the very least.  We worked for years on paper and MHS bought we went to an LIS.  Which changed during each sale thereafter.  I'm glad not to be there except to visit people.  

The worst experience in my career was the night that some guy with an aortic anuersym  spent the whole night in surgery.  We went through about 60 components on this dude and totally changed his blood type because the surgeon insisted on whole blood and our pathologist backed him up.   Dude ended up dying in Memphis and their transfusion service called to ask "what the hell did y'all do up there!"

We all have stories and I think that sharing them is a big part of life.  We think we know people and then we get to talking and find out other parts than the ones that we know.  Communication always works.  It may be messy, but the end result is finding out what the issues are and mediating.  

That's my wisdom for the day ^j^

the maze

We are currently navigating the cluster that follows a car accident.  Since Sunday we have had no ride and have depended on gracious friends and family to get things done.  I am really puzzled at how long the process has been to get a rental.  Normally it happens same day or next.  LP has been recovering from both the flu and the wreck this week but went back to work today.  

I am skimming through the news daily but not dwelling on it.  Trump's Gaza fantasy is causing a lot of other countries to rethink their ties with the US.  Thank goodness 

for the judges who have put the brakes on a lot of the executive orders.  

Another of my old friends passed away.  Mackie Gene and I dated for about a year and then parted ways.  This guy loved golf more than life itself and was tickled to be staying in a house where we could see the second hole at the city course right behind my former house on Pecan Lane.  He even worked there after retirement from Colonial.

My friend Mamye is settled into her new apartment and loving it.  I am so happy for her!  It has been a long haul this past few years for she and Steve.  Her life will be much easier living in a smaller place in town.

My muse has left lately so I don't have much more in me than a short daily post.  Love ya.  Mean it ^j^

saa

surprise

Yesterday started out as a very good one.  SS and worship were amazing and I walked out feeling full of grace.  Lauren was supposed to pick me up and when I went out she wasn't there which was concerning.  She had my phone and I called from a friend's phone to check on her.  She answered me from the emergency room where she had been transported by ambulance from a wreck.  The staff was gracious and timely and after several scans we were told that she had a cracked kneecap on the same knee that had surgery a few years ago.  It could have been much much worse but for the grace of God.  The car was towed and we all know that these things take a hot minute to get resolved.  My friends took me to the ER and my cousin brought us home.  Brother picked me up this morning to go to the insurance agency and get the ball rolling.  It takes a village, ya' know.  

Three weeks ago the entire congregation sang happy birthday to Mr. Jack Todd online for his 100th.  Mr. Todd was one of the finest gentlemen I have ever had the privilege to call friend.  One of his daughters and I have been close friends since school days and my visits to their home were always fun and relaxed.  He passed away a few days ago after living a full and happy life.  I feel sure he and his BFF Dr Talley are enjoying their morning coffee together in heaven.

The weather is absolutely gorgeous here so I will be on the porch most of the day I imagine.  I miss that sweet doggie Bandit coming around but I' am glad he has a permanent home.  We did fatten him up quite a bit before he left.

Fill up your tanks before the tariffs hit.  Mexico is playing ball with Trump which is a good thing if even for a month.  I sincerely hope that Canada and China will decide to as well.

That's about all I've got for today.  Y'all be careful out there.  People are crazy!

you get what you vote for

The Trump administration has only just begun to purge and discriminate.  Huge tariffs will go into effect tomorrow meaning that the price of many many goods will skyrocket.  Oil. Food. Electonics.  You name it.  I have watched as gas prices inched up over the past 2 weeks and also the price of food.  I have no disposable income for electronics which is why I don't type too well with the laptop and phone due to failing vision.  If you are rich, these things do not concern you in the least.  If you are on a fixed income like myself, they definitely do.  As I understand it, his plan is to drill the hell out of Alaska to make up for the imports.  Like that is going to happen overnight?  Nada.  He is quick to abolish and slow to provide solutions.  Last I heard, RFK has not been confirmed yet, nor Gabbard.  I believe with all my heart that there are enough Republicans to stop some of the nonsense if they will just stand up and speak their minds.  Many are afraid of losing their jobs, but there are others where they can thrive and not be a part of the tearing apart of our country.

One suggestion that I have for them is to require welfare recipients to take the jobs that immigrants have been doing since they will be deported. At the very least, require community service at the soup kitchens and community resource facilities that support them.  Many of them are not able, and that's okay.  It's the ones that work the system that piss me off.  Get offa' your ass and do something productive.  I am 69 years old and still trying to work to make ends meet.  something ain't right there.

I am limited as to what jobs I can do because of my failing eyesight.  I have an ostomy which requires expensive supplies and insurance only pays 80%.  I am not having a pity party here.  I worked my ass off for over 40 years in the healthcare field and saw failure after failure to treat patients with compassion.  Most practitioners are overworked and underpaid but expected to be available 24/7.  

As for food, eating healthy is not in the budget for many.  I would love to be able to do that with an occasional splurge but it's either eat or pay the bills.  The state of Tennessee has passed a school voucher program which will effectively pay for home schooling and Christian education.  And all of us will pay them for that privilege even if our kids are in public school.

So, in today's news Hegseth has put media offices in at Pentagon on a "rotation" replacing NBC with three conservative news providers and HuffPost which is kind of puzzling.  Huff said they didn't even ask for it. Hmmm.  We shall see.

As always, keep the faith.  Speak your mind and stand behind your beliefs ^j^

 

blame

I listened to as much of Trump's rambling briefing on the mid-air collision as I could stand.  He immediate't evely started blaming everybody including Biden and Pete for this happening.  Oh, and DEI too. This man is a lunatic fixated on revenge.  He repeated himself many times about how it takes very special intelligent people to prevent these things.  Yet he and his buddies are cutting funds every which a way.  Are air traffic controllers considered federal civilian employees?  I cannot even keep up with the cast of characters at this point,  Niether can he.

Yesterday afternoon I was sunning like a turtle on the deck and today is monsoon season.  Like, you can't even see to drive.  My biggest fear is getting hit by some idiot with no headlights on in the dark and or rain.  They creep among us.  Speaking of traffic, we have three new businesses going in across from Kroger.  The traffic is already horrendous and I'm wondering how the city fathers will handle the flow to that busy intersection.  Just a thought as Belle would say.

Peace ^j^

wait and see

Being the "listen to all sides" kind of gal that I am, I adopted that attitude when Trump was elected.  I have watched intently to the executive orders issued since day 1 and I must say it is way more than I expected at this point.Not really surprised mine you, just kind of losing faith in this administration day by day.  I did not vote for this yet I have to accept it.  Avoiding the usual means of checks and balances is very dangerous to we the people.  I am particularly concerned about RFK being in charge of all things healthcare.  His cousin Caroline outlined many facts about him including excessive drug use.  Great.  He and Musk can have raves and dream up new ways to torment us.  

The freeze on federal funding came as a surprise even to those who are his supporters.  While he "figures out what's what."  Meanwhile non-profits that take care of the least of these will suffer from delays in continuity of care through community based services.  Musk is already calculating how much the debt will shrink with these cuts.  I am beyond disgusted with this blatant hit at people who cannot help themselves.  There are a few things I agree with.  I do believe that EBT recipients should have a work requirement.  There are way too many folks out there watching 
TV and eating off of our tax dollars.  Plus, EBT is often sold to fund a drug habit.  

LP has been laying like a corpse for almost a week now.  I'm pretty sure it's the flu so let's all hold hans an pray that this old gal doesn't get it.  Mamye staye with us for a few days an it was chaotic but fun.  Except for Lauren being deathly ill! I don't about y'all but I am as ready for spring as I have ever been.  Toay should be close to 60 ( faux spring ) and tomorrow is a total washout.  Two inches of rain.

I so grateful for the kindness that have been shared with me this past year or five.  I try to pay it forward by helping others however I can.  Some days it's as simple as holding the door open or saying thank you to a clerk.  When somebody drops a door in my face I consier it disrespectful.  A doctor did that one time at the hospital an I will never forget the look of self importance as he did it.  

So y'all be careful out there.  There is a local pandemic of flu/covid/rsv/mycoplasma etc.  The rapid tests aren't always accurate depending on what part of the disease you are in.  Tamiflu is probably hard to come by at this point.  I guess you could try ivermectin...lol

Love y'all like chicken.  Keep the faith ^j^

silence is golden

The attic crew finished up about 11 yesterday and all is quiet at the moment except for the whir of the dryer.  I am very impressed at how quickly they worked and their respect for the fact that two of us are living here while they made hella' noise.  They all spoke some English so that helped.  The bonus was me getting to snuggle with an English bulldog pup while the contractor did his business.  Aon't nothing like puppy breath to make a girl's day. There is a whole lot of cleaning to be done but, thankfully, David let us borrow his shop vac for just that purpose.  If you need renovation work done, let me know and I will hook you up with him.  Also, his daughter is starting a cleaning seen blessedrvice and I can put you in touch with her as well.

LP and I are still sharing a phone because hers died, which is a challenge.  We hope to recify that when the money gets right if ever. We have been blessed with financial help from friends and family which has made life not so stressful.  My vision is getting worse worse by the day so I am grateful to have my daughter here to help out. She is very patient with me and we have long talks about family and our history here on the farm; I have a plethora of doctor appointments to make for vision and gut issues and she will be driving Miss Janie for all of that.  The state of Tennesse has a program for the visually impaired and Samantha has visited twice to do assessments and order things that I need. I am whittling down the list of meds that I take because many are not necessary any more.  Added daily Vitamin D and quit Bp med because it runs low now. I have lost 30 pounds since the big fat surgery 5 years ago.  This time five years ago, I was in a nursing home.

If you are anywhere close to Covington TN, please check out Sean Dietrich's show at the Ruffin on February 7th.  Tell him Janie sent ya'!

As always, keep the faith ^j^

gracias

Currently there is a lot of Spanish being spoken with the three who are working in the attic.  They have played  music and sang while they worked and I love it.  I just wish I knew what they're saying!  We should probably be much warmer tonight because of today's activity but it ain't over yet.  Not by a long shot.

Bandit the neighbor dog that really just wanted to eat and run has been adopted, thank you sweet baby jeebus.  The neighbor knew I was feeding him and expecting him so he called yesterday to tell me he's got a home.  I just about cried..  He could have been an outside dawg here but he wouldn't come in out of the cold. We did fatten his cute self, though.  And got lots puppy kisses.  He was probably scared to come in because of Rosie...lol

The hits just keep on coming with people I love.  Sometimes I wonder about that but I feel like it's all in God's hands.  I can be sad and share that sadness with the people that I care for.  No prying, no judgement.  Just a companion in grief.  

Welp, the noise upstairs is brutal so I'm headed to the porch.  Keep the faith kids ^j^

the pretender

Welp, as we all know everybody on the interwebs is not who they claim to be.  I've had several horrible experiences caused by being too naive.  AI makes things that much more challenging.  I mentioned yesterday that I got a comment from someone pretending to be Sean Dietrich.  He is NOT on Facebook except with his business and blogs.  My first red flag was when I saw that this Sean impersonator had only one other friend...big clue.  The guy is followed and read by thousands.  And this dude actually used HIS personal photo to create a facebook page and try to dupe people.  He is blocked as well as the one who "accepted" my friend request that I didn't even send.  I am a seasoned old broad with experiences that include, but are not limited to, a short romance with a Nigerian prince and a whirl with sharks promising to fix my FB page for gift cards.  Lerd.

It is cold as a witch's you know what and getting colder by the minute.  Forecasts are for the snow going south....like WAY south which doesn't bother me at all.  The one we had was pretty but I'm ready for spring now.  The attic here is not insulated and I can actually see up into it when the sun is shining just right.  Insulation is in the planning stage as well as an attic door that I can maneuver.  

I live in a circa 1940is original log cabin that faces north.  All of the chinks are loose and air from that direction blows through the cracks.  Fortunately there is a fireplace in the living room to know that chill off a bit.  We are told that the only fix for that is to put siding outside on that wall.  The front and back logs were left exposed for aesthetic purposes.  Back?  No problem because it faces southwest.  I often sit out there on the screened in porch and watch the sun go down.   

I am trying to watch church online and there are some sort of technical difficulties.  I am such a cynic I blame other tech companies!  What the heck is a bad gateway??  I am not a TikTok person much so I won't miss it but I'll bet there are a lot of folks going through withdrawals right about now.  The sad thing is that so many small business people use that platform and they have lost their way to shine.  Trump was the one who originally proposed this long ago, but now he's changing his tune a bit.  And blaming it all on Biden.  Uncle Joe just said "Let him deal with it."  He is d.o.n.e.  I have a blue wave friend who actually got invited to some sort of inaugural and he went, just for shits and giggles.  ate some good food and took it all in.  And I don't blame him.  It was a rare opportunity to reach across the aisle, so to speak.

The two party system is the American way but not necessarily the best.  One is labeled as liberal and the other as conservative.  But within those two categories there is a wide range of extremism and refusal to meet in the middle.  The necessity of being right all the time without seeing the other point of view is the cause of a lot of political discourse.  I consider myself a conservative Democrat if that is such a thing.  I do not go far left.  My beliefs include anti-death penalty, pro choice, healthcare for all and many more issues that some consider radical.  They are not, by any means.  Healthcare is a human right and in this country it has been turned into a multi billion dollar business.  

Take specialty care, for instance.  Most GPs will see something or you tell them something and they will send you to several different specialists.  Part of this is to cover their asses, which I understand because malpractice premiums are sky high.  However, if you have seen said specialist for several years and are stable, there is no reason for a GP to not monitor the condition.  There is a paper, or portal, trail.

Back when I was working at the local hospital that was one of the things I thought I would never see.....connectivity between healthcare providers.  It took 30 years but by golly we have it now.  If the system ain't down.  Then you're all screwed.  One of the most trying experiences of my work life was being a front line installer during an LIS conversion following a sale.  Seven facilities in West Tennessee were purchased from Methodist Healthcare and to save money, the buyer drafted employees to do coding, etc for all of the facilities.  Each one had their own codes and there were procedure codes to be matched.  It was a nightmare.  When we went live for training at our facility, the installer told us that THEY usually did all the stuff that we did.  Hmmmm.

LP is in Jackson with Babygirl so me and Rosie are trying to stay warm up in here.  Facets are dripping already and will be until Wednesday.  Rosie slept with me last night in her usual spot up against my backside.  Later she crawled under the covers.  I hope that the neighborhood dog Bandit is not left out in the cold during this time.  We would take him in but he refuses to cross the threshold.  There is a crate on the front porch if he chooses to bed down there.  It's all we can do.

Keep those faucets dripping and cabinet doors open ^j^

you are not alone

A friend with the same last name as me has told me that several times and I believe it.  Sooo many folks care about me and my family.  Lauren has convinced me that if you don't seek help when you need it, that's your pride getting in the way.  And we all know that it goeth before a fall.  And I fall a lot these days both literally and figuratively.  

Winter is back but it does not look like it will stay long this time.  Maybe a few nights of dripping water.  I was shocked to get a kinda sorta message from a writer that I admire.  I shared Sean Dietrich's post about his Huntsville appearance in March and tagged my friend who lives there.  And he said I could DM him.  Sean gets hundreds of messages from people who would like their stories to be told.  His wife Jamie is a jewel and together with the blind dog Magnolia, they make a very happy family.  They have adopted Becca Butler as their niece and she has her own challenges which he has written about often.  Their trips and whatnot.  She now has her own page to share her story.  Pretty cool considering that she is blind.   Becca has her own therapy dog (a lab) and apps to help her read.  One of them is called "tell me what I see."  Amazing stuff that I will probably need in the future.

So yeah, readers matter.  A lot!  I have a ton of followers but most don't read unless I post on FB.  I began blogging when my friend Zubrovka and sister-in-law introduced me to the platform.  The first one was named Poop Happens and I actually won a website design from Tamara in Canada.  Another friend offered me free Wordpress that he never used but I'm used to Blogger and that's where my stories are.  All eight million of them.

There were a couple of spinoffs like From the Back Burner ( recipes ) and Pecan Lane Photography ( back when I had a good camera.)  They are still there and I should most definitely concentrate on the food one.  I love sharing recipes like my mother did.  Lauren and I were out of chocolate so we made my cousin's famous Fudge Pie last night and devoured it.  She read the ingredients to me as I measured and mixed.  If that ain't generational, I don't know what is.

Y'all stay warm and keep faith that there is a plan ^j^

 

abalama

No I did not spell it wrong.  It's what I call the state on the way to Gulf Shores and Florida.  Floribama sits right smack on the state line and got blown away in some hurricane or another, but it's still there.  We took LP in there once and I wasn't really ready for the fact that it was a package store and bar.  We scurried on out and had virgin drinks at the state park inn.  That place was awesome but it got blown away too.  So did the pier.  My last beach trip was across the bridge from Ft. Walton.  Very cool setup.  Okaloosa, I believe.  

That was 9 years ago and I so miss the ocean.  The place we stayed had permanent residents that played cards on the second floor above us every day.  I would too, ya' know?  Heather went shopping and I just enjoyed being out there.  The last day before we left, I sat on the patio and just listened to the sound of God in those waves.  There were birds and boats and all sorts of pretty things to look at.  An occasional "eat at mike's" flag flying behind a small plane.  She was almost pregnant with AJ at the time.  Later on the next year Reaves was born.  What a coincidence ;)

I am trying to dwell on the happy memories instead of stressing about what might happen next week.  One thing for sure is that nothing much will be on day one.  Or two.  You cannot executive order your way through Congress no matter who your buddies are.  It really amazes me that nobody is much worried about this scenario.  I don't lose sleep over it but sheeeessshhh.  Rather than say "I told you so" I just pray to survive it all.  I think that is the difference in reality for many of us.  I have several friends who have told me that my posts are stupid because they don't agree with my political beliefs.  I have never said that to anybody.  Not online or in person.  

Ready or not, here it comes on MLK day, no less.  Events will be held indoors because of the weather so there will prolly be a big traffic jam of limos lining up by the rotunda.  The crowd will look much bigger than that bunch on the plaza back in whatever year it was.  That was pitiful!  

If I turn out to be wrong about DJT, I will freely admit it.  If I am better off in 2 or 4 years, I will give his administration their due.  I don't see that happening, being the realist that I am.  Not pessimistic, just realistic.  When billionaires come together to run the country it turns into an oligarchy.  Google that, if you will.  

Freedom of speech will soon be a thing of the past because all the social media people are up Trump's ass.  I try not to rant on this but lawwwd.  Let's give peace a chance ^j^

one for the team

I am really pretty much a tough broad most of the time  I roll with the punches and smile through tears when times are hard.  Right now is not one of those times.  Over the past year there have been many losses in our lives.  I am grateful for all that I have, really.  These things too shall pass.  Lauren ard I are two strong women trying to survive in a world which ain't very kind.  We have adapted to the changes that have come our way and kept the faith.  And me?  I'm about to lose that faith.  Survival is a very strong instinct and that is what's happening right now.

It's not all financial, mind you.  I have lost several dear friends in the past year and the hits just keep on coming.  I never really cried over any of them bnt now the tears are about to bust out.  I think that it is only trusting in God that makes thing bearable.  He knows the plan and I'm just a player if I let go and allow the spirit to work  Sometimes I think the hard times are meant to humble us so that we get to that point.  

I'm not a glass half full or half empty kind of thinker  I see life as a series of challenges, some good and some bad.  But often we wonder "Am I not a good person?"  As we know bad things happen to good people.  That is a fact in everyone's life.  I do not see God as vengeful or "making" bad things happen.  I'm too much of a New Testament sort of gal.  I know that I'm a big fat sinner but that Jesus died on that cross so that I would be forgiven.  The God of the Old Testament was sending messages hot and heavy to all those folks to listen to Him.  And I do believe that is what is happening now.  

Climate change is real y'all  And yes, it was caused by our greed during the industrial age and beyond.  Consume more, be bigger and make money off of the common man.  I have never been considered wealthy.  Always lower middle class.  The one year that my husband and I brought in 80K is was because he worked his ass off at the rubber plant doing doubles and weekends when they were available.  Late 70s and 80s for sure.  Until the bottom fell out in '88.  That is when we sold our small house in town and started the adventure on Pecan Lane.   Our daughter was 4 years old and we thought it best to raise her in the country with her grandparents nearby.

Daddy and I worked on that old house for six months to make it liveable.  The rent was maybe 300?    It took 10 years to clean out the attic and basement from Mr. Council's 50 year tenure as the horse guy.And evidently rabbit guy too because there were empty feed bags everywhere!  The concrete basement had an old stove that didn't work so it was pretty cold down there.  Plus it leaked and flooded so there was a bit of mold.  Animals were born and died down there, most of them our pets.  When the cat population got too big, Gumbler took care of that with a "dairy barn" destination.  

Many of them are buried in that yard.  Pet cemetery, if you will.  We now have one forever *spayed* cat and a dog that wants to be ours but it's taking awhile.  We will more than likely get him vetted if possible, and let him live here, outside.  He was so skinny when he first showed up it was pitiful.  And now he's not.  He loves rubs and kisses and sits on command.  Bandit is still working on the 44 lb bag of high protein food that Cathy brought some weeks ago.  I refuse to let any animal or person suffer if I can help it.  Don't be surprised if you see a fundraiser for this dog....lol

I wandered outside to see the sunset and it did not disappoint.  That gave me a bit of faith.  And hope.  And love ^j^

 

pissing match

I have some very strong emotions regarding the current battle between Trump and the governor of California.  What many of us have believed for years is happening in full color.  The real estate market is taking advantage of an act of nature.  It's probably that way everywhere that disaster strikes.  Some folks just have no morals, ya' know?  I am blessed to have a reasonable rent but utilities are a stretch.  Especially propane!  My brother and I have a plan that will make everybody's life easier.  

Delivery can be risky business in the dark as LP found out yesterday.  I will spare the details except for the driver's side door gives us just enough room to scoot in and out.  Thanks be!  We are under your eye God.  The client was gracious enough to pay for a truck to get her out.  He even took pictures.  That's a great guy right there with a shitty landlord.  

I talk to Mamye daily, just like before.  She sounds exhausted but okay.  Steve's family have come together with her to honor him and his life.  My service will be similar to his with a visitation and cremains down where the Carter family ancestors live.  Lauren will want some to scatter over our lives here on the farm.  I'm not dying ( as far as I know ) but the plans are made.  KK has my back.

I know all about when the evil started in the Garden of Eden and whatnot.  That damn snake!  Anywho, there went sin as a go to.  People's opinions about what is a sin are varied depending on religious beliefs.  In SS last week we heard six out of the ten.  No adultery.  Honor your parents.  Do not lie.  Anybody could tell when I'm lying so I don't have to worry about that one.  I just tell the truth like it is in my world.  I do not judge yours.  Jesus loved everybody and their mama'n'them and cured the sickness away in miraculous ways.  

Daddy was raised in the SBC and Mom was a legacy DFUMC. The  church history is amazing and my mom's family was a huge part of it.  My great grandmother Ethe; Inez took her canaries on Easter at sunrise.  At least that's what Mama told me.  Daddy was always in the choir when we were kids and I sat with Mom while the boys slept through it all.  Many UMC congregations have been torn apart over the issues of gay marriage and gay clergy.  Ours was one of them.  Me and all the other lifers were pretty bummed out, to say the least.  The night of the vote the sanctuary was packed to the gills and I thought to myself where are you folks in the  life of this church?  There was serious tension in the room and in the end, the vote to leave did not pass.  There was a split and a lot of folks went there.

I am a liberal conservative if that makes sense at all.  Very conservative in a lot of ways, but not when it comes to human rights.  My faith in God tells me that being mean and a war monger is not the ultimate plan.  Oh yeah, there was a lot of bad stuff in the OT but the good news came later after the prophets foretold it.  Can you tell I'm cruising toward Lent?

My kinda' sorta' dog is on the porch eating.  I had to fill the pan back up because the stray Siamese looking boyfriend of Rosie is eating it.  I actually saw him last night and he is gorgeous.  Lives under the house and eats mice I reckon.  I have never had to go looking for a pet because they always just show up.  If you feed them they will come.  

Y'all take it easy.  Give it to God ^j^