under the radar

I started out the day with a tear in my eye while hugging my friend as she left to go face what's left of her marriage and try to figure things out. She has tried so hard to be a good wife and mother to kids that are NOT hers, pretty much without their father's support. During that time, her only son deployed to Iraq with the Army which was one more stress. For a solid year she never completely relaxed, never knowing when that phone call might come. She even enlisted herself, and began bootcamp..just to show her support. I pleaded with her not to go, because that put both of 'em in harm's way. Steven was on search and rescue duty one day, in his usual position when his partner Sean switched with him because of an upcoming incline. Sean was killed while his buddy freaked, and he returned to the US a changed man forever. Following the funeral and his return to Iraq, he and Sean's widow stayed in touch and helped each other grieve. She was pregnant and needed to feel her late husband's presence in some way. That, my friends, is where duty ended and love began. Another child..this one a girl..is due this year. If I didn't know that was a true story, I'd make it up just because I'm such a sucker for love. But it is, and it's played out over and over again as vets return from a thankless war and an ungrateful government. A large majority of our voters believe it's time to call it, if not "quits" at least plan get the hell out as safely and quickly as possible. While we're chasing the Jihad over there, the Asians are setting their sites on us. Plus a whole lot more people who hate the "western" ways. You don't like our ways? Fine then, do it your way. But please don't blow the shit out of innocent people just to make a point. Same goes for big dude over there in Syria. ENOUGH already!

The sawmill is gettin' interesting what with new admins and changes out in the other areas of our 'hood. We were busy as a cat covering up poop today and I had my first cry after I talked to the ever patient propane guy and he was so nice I was humbled. I explained to him where I'd been the past year and he understood why I put him on the back burner. That's the nice thing about self employed people....they can try harder with the ones who are really trying back. One of the things about our society that I detest is the way entitlement has worked its' way into a couple of generations since the concept first appeared to save our economy post WWII. There is nothing racist about that belief, because users come in all creeds and colors. They're the ones who will learn the ropes of sorely overburdened governmental agencies and ride them like a zipline to the meth or crack house closest to their lab. When the whole thing blows up, the landlord is responsible for hazmat cleanup which runs about thirty thousand. For every really sick patient seeking healthcare services, there are ten more who just want drugs. Emergency rooms are the go-to place because in rural areas, there are rarely 24/7 urgent care clinics. Ours closes at 9.

That the major export from Mexican cartels now is meth and heroin, I am deeply disturbed that some badass decided to go bust all the pot shops where home grown product was monitored and taxed locally as approved by taxpayers. Hey..didn't any of ya'll watch Weeds???? There will always be a tunnel because some poor sucker thinks it's better on the other side of the Rio Grande or Lake Michigan or whatever. And I69 which has been called the "road to NAFTA" will finish up the job, if it's ever completed. Let's call it Clinton highway.

I have custody of the phone this afternoon while BG gets some rays before the wedding. She fried the first time, but I've worked up to it. She was white as an albino! I certainly don't adore the sun as much as I used to in an oil me up and bake kind of way. Hats are my friend in these days of global warming and southern summer heat. She's going to outfit me for the afternoon, which suits me fine because I'm working and it fits right into the slide toward bed. No partyin' though...sawmill weekend. It's been nice in a way not to have the ability to constantly text and be distracted from work..and each OTHER. There were 900 conversations going on today, all backed by the roar of AC vents,analyzers and centrifuges. I honestly felt like a total out of body experience at one point when somebody glibly said "You okay?" and then walked away as I said not really. She never even heard my response. I felt totally invisible, and that's when the last tear fell.

^j^