oscar boi

We have a long history with that little black and white terrier mix.  He was probably at least five when he came to live with us on the hill to escape the crazy neighbors who were torturing him.  Somebody abused him badly as in cuts on his back.  When I called animal control dude said he couldn't even feed his family much less a dog.  And so, he became ours along with Sammy D and Ellie and multiple cats.  That was about the time that some old guy passed out across the road while picking pecans and fought the EMTs even though he had pissed himself and gone down cold.  He drove through my yard and down the hill to get away and they followed him to the highway.

To love an animal is to do your best to care for them through thick and thin but it always turns out that they die like Betty White and break your heart.  His bed sits empty by the fireplace and he's probably somewhere lost and freaked out by duck hunters and or fireworks people.  It is NYE, after all.   I have taken in and lost two cats just in the one year that I've been here.   There are coyotes and hawks and giant vultures that scoop up the weak ones.  Nature can be cruel.  

Once upon a time Lauren hit a doe up by the dairy barn and she lay there for a few days with her buck keeping watch.  I have no doubt that the deer that still live here are of that family.  It's a no kill zone out here.

I pray that we have a more peaceful year and learn to build bridges and make peace rather than fight about what's right.  If you cannot understand from whence someone came, at least don't be mean.

Keep the faith ^j^

square one

My coach told me to start small.  As a seasoned blogger I thought I knew a lot about writing, so I submitted my piece about the farm to a local mag.  In retrospect, I think it was mostly a favor from a friend that made that happen.  Here's the thing with writing:  If you have advertisers you have to publish things that your audience is interested in and that piece was about agriculture.  I have another great story idea about the revitalization of South Mill Ave in Dyersburg.  That stretches all the way back to before Chris had moved his business down there and there was nothing but Penningtons. At the time I was in conversation with John Ruskey and Jim Stark who were planning an expedition on the Forked Deer river to show locals how bad the trash was.  Ruskey spent the night in a tent on my front yard with that big ass canoe and I fed him steak.  As I remember, he bought peaches at the Farmer's Market down by the river.  There was no room for me in the canoe since it was all filled with dignitaries and whatnot but I followed them to the end until they floated under the first of the double bridges.  Yeah, that was me hanging over the edge only I wasn't thinking about jumping.  Seriously.  Besides, it's not very tall.  

I will find my place eventually.  I found a stink bug on my desk this morning and of course had to Google the totem.  Mostly it was about becoming resilient and learning to watch out for your surroundings.  I know better than to squish one so I just flicked him off.  I went to the funeral home (again) and saw lots of old friends this morning.  Me and Joy had an outing today and I got all my trash hauled off.  She just loves the wide open spaces here.  And Oscar.  

Say it like you mean it and keep the faith ^j^

justice

Maxwell, on five out of six charges of sex trafficking.  As I watched the press mill around outside the courthouse and cops joking up by the front door, my thoughts were with all those young girls who will be forever scarred.  I imagine they were mostly lost and forgotten by their families and struggling for a better life.  And life with those two looked pretty ritzy.  I am proud that the legal system worked in this case.  

I actually like jury duty at the local level.  Once I was in a jury pool in Memphis Federal Court for the month of December.  By some miracle I never had to show up.  I think it was an icy month.  Locally, I have been called and only chosen as a prospective juror once.  After sitting in the courtroom all day I told the judge that I worked with several of the defendants.  I was dismissed by Your Honor.

I am a scientist and tend toward DNA type evidence in violent crimes where there is blood and body tissues involved.  If it's some crackhead who killed somebody to steal, string them up.  So much of our court system is based on lawyers winning and losing cases of this nature and very little attention is paid to the ones who are going down the rabbit hole because of addiction.  Offer more programming and resources for these people.  It costs less than housing them in jail.  

I got Nina to work on my raggedy nails today and enjoyed the luxury of it.  I told her to skip the top coat because Joy was ready to go and I can do that here.  About the time we left the bottom fell out so I got soaking wet but by golly her hair didn't.  

Y'all be blessed ^j^

win and lose

I got a notice from the government that I will get a 6% raise on SS which is "historic"  but Medicare Part B went from 143 to 170.  It's all funny money in my book.  The way I see it the great American lie is that if you give the government part of your paycheck for a 41 year career and you end up at 66 dealing with the consequences.  Which are : navigating the supplements every year and trying to understand it all.  If I were not of somewhat of sound mind, I'd never know and would need a healthcare advocate.  I don't think the government pays for that.

It's still very warm here and that saves on propane so there ya' go.  I have turned on the AC a couple of times just so I can breathe.  The tree is down and I'm over all the hustle and bustle.  When I get some money I'm going to go clearance shopping!

I have no resolutions, per se.  Happily oblivious to the real world, I am enjoying my golden years as best I can.  If I had any advice at all for boomers it would be retire now after careful planning.  You never know which day will be your last ^j^

the cardinals

Yesterday Reaves and I were painting unicorns and she spotted some red birds out in the driveway.  "Gaga...look!"  I explained to her that, to me, when cardinals showed up it was the spirit of somebody who was gone.  There were two males and a female which I promptly identified as my mama, my daddy and her grandfather.  I don't know if that one will stick, but I hope so.

If you are the praying sort, please keep my bestie Lorna and her family on your list.  She is facing a double mastectomy and is Mammy to her daughter's kids.  It's been like working a puzzle to get the whole plan in place because she's in Florida.  If you see me post a GoFundMe for her, you can bet she needs the help.  There will be extra expenses like mastectomy bras and other stuff.  

The tree is half lit and I don't even care.  I had good intentions of waiting until Epiphany but it's all in the way of where Reaves' tent will go.  I won't pack up the nativity until then ^j^

Merry Holidays to all y'all

And of course to mama'n'them and all the aunties.  I cooked cheese grits and scrambled eggs this morning and Bubba provided the meat.  Grilled stuff!   It was short and sweet but he came back by later and got a big Merry Christmas from the girls. We had Christmas part II here today and it was fun.  Lots of toys and memories.   I made the mistake of picking up a book that my Daddy had written for me....one of those tell me about yourself things.  He explained that he grew up poor and his family was not really able to give presents and such.  He spoke about how he and Mama did the best they could to make sure we got what we needed and sometimes, what we wanted.  They wished they could have given me more  That's when the tears started.  

Thanks to global warming I sat on the front porch for quite awhile, looking at the landscape and remembering every inch of this.  All of the barns and long gone houses and the families that lived in them.  There used to be horses at every barn and cattle too.  Daddy knew how to herd the cattle and wasn't scared at all.  My husband got smashed by one and said "no more."  

Reaves woke up at 4AM so by the time they got here she was past ready for round 2.  We opened and played and she ended up glued to Jillian and Addie as usual.  All the toys she got are interactive and aligned with fun and learning.  Girl is smart....just saying.  She has always been an artist at heart like her mother so she's ready with her own set of pastels/pencils and whatever.  I think there was a ruler too!

My boyfriends came by late afternoon for a little visit and we all just chilled.  On the front porch.  On Christmas.  What a blessing ^j^

the manger

I have been going to church since I was a kid and learned a lot in Bible School and whatnot.  Many of those stories I still remember!  It has only been during the past five years that I realize what a gift God gave to us freely.  His only begotten son.  I'm especially captivated by Elizabeth.  Me, Lauren and Reaves all have Elizabeth in our names.  When Mary arrived to help her out, lo and behold she was pregnant too!  And a virgin, no less.  But yet they came from near and far to worship the King.  

I was out running around all day playing Sandy Claws and visiting with folks.  I met six dogs at one house and two at another.  In between there was a drop by to wish Carney a happy birthday.  She's 89 but don't look it a bit.  I've been cooking in true Mama Stafford style.  Got those cheese grits ready to bake.  Bubba's gonna' grill the bacon so all I have to do is slap some biscuits in the oven.  BTW, it will be 76 tomorrow here in balmy West Tennessee.  At least the wind has died down!

Happy holidays ^j^

dumbass redemption

Of course, I got up early to find that my tire still had some air in it so I headed to somewhere to get the whole deal looked at.  It went flat about 500 yards from the by-pass.  I called Lake Road for a service call only to find that the spare was flat too.  I drove it really slow up to Mr. Smiths and he aired it up enough for me to get to the station where Cody proceeded to knock out the dent so that it holds air.  The whole deal cost 45 bucks.  I'll take it. Merry Christmas to Brian and all y'all who take care of loyal customers.  

The cake is ready for delivery and Bubba's deviled eggs are done.  The girls came by today and Reaves opened one present which was a makeup kit.  She now has sparkly eyelids.  I just went about my business with my chores and let them chill.  We had a baby Jesus lesson with the nativity and all the figures are covered in neon eye shadow.  Kind of glittery.

I spent time outside today working on my Vitamin D level.  The pecans are gone and now it's time to mulch.  Spring will be here before you know it!  Peace and grace ^j^

y

dumbass of the day

I made a quick stop on the way home after work and circled around to pull back onto the highway and ran over a curb.  The guy at the nail salon was outside smoking and saw it happen.  When I jumped out to see the damage I could hear air gushing out so I high tailed it to the nearest tire center and the guy found that my rim was bent.  Tire was okay.  I went on down to Lake Road Amoco and got them to check it out and it was only a half pound low.  She advised me to get the hell home and worry about finding a rim tomorrow.  By the time I got home all the salvage yards were closed so I'm expecting a flat tire in the morning.  Which is a problem because I have to go to work.  I'm reaching out to folks to help me get there and back and will start calling salvage yards in the morning to find a rim.   On Christmas eve eve.  Lerd.

Otherwise life is just rosy and you never know when the other shoe will drop.  When it does, soldier on ^j^

don't ask me

I am one of those people who will keep your secrets to my grave. Okay, I might have told it once or twice but always in a loving way.  Church was glorious today,  Choir was absent so I sat with one my friends and sang my heart out. Today's playlist was spot on. There were handbells across the rail and that always make me happy!  

Well, now it's Tuesday and in typical Poopie fashion I did not finish what I started.  Squirrel!  Since then Patty and I have wrapped up pecan picking 2021 and most are cracked.  I think between us we have picked close to 200 pounds just from the two trees in my yard.  We both have rollers but sometimes you just gotta' get down on all fours and do pecan yoga.  Neither one of us can walk by one without picking it up.  I guess it's like crack to us.

My friends and I went out to dinner this evening and I loved every minute of it.  I hardly ever go out after dark being the homebody that I am.  Plus there's that night vision thing.  We gathered together an extra tip for our waitress and she didn't even have time to open the card!  They were slammed.  That's why you go early to Moustos.  

 I am so proud of my old friend for being sworn in as judge today.  He is a good honest down to earth man which is what the justice system needs.  I'm loosely pulling together my next article about Brad Kellum and his rise from soap in the garage to custom wooden boards.  More later on that.  His website is not even live yet but will be in the spring.  These are to die for works of art for your culinary displays.

We are T-4 days until Santa comes so if you don't have your shopping done, sucks to be you.  Slowly but surely I'm pulling things together around here.  I have a couple of cakes to make and Christmas breakfast but I'm good on the rest.  I have no plans for Christmas Eve except to plant those bulbs I got on the cheap at Lowe's at my parents' grave.  The weather looks nice for outdoor play.

I pray that you have hope peace love and joy not just this month but all year long ^j^

the little things

I ended up in the waiting room of a tire place today and noticed a mama with a little girl who looked to be Reaves' age.  Her mom was on her phone and it was obvious that said kid was bored to death.  She proceeded to make a tent out of her mom's parka and hide until we left.  Mom passed her phone into the tent and all was well.  I tapped her head when I left and said Merry Christmas.  It made my day.  After that was a return books to the library stop.  I thought we had lost one but found it under Joy's bed today.  So thankful for no late fees!

I saw a stack of the magazines that my article will be included around January.  It's mostly huntin' and fishin' and whatnot.  But I did notice an ag story in the current issue.  I mean you gotta' diversify!  That is the way my friend Brad has grown his business.  He started out making soap in his garage and become the owner of a franchise called Buff City Soap.  He is now launching another brand featuring carved wooden boards.  And I will have one.  

So many people are on my heart these days.  Two of my friends are facing breast cancer.  All those poor folks who are suffering the effects of storms stay with me through every hour and day.  Death knows no holiday and another close friend's mother is about to pass over.  She called me today to tell me she's there for the duration.  I know the drill because I did it with both of my parents.  

I have a lot of pet peeves and most of them are traffic and vehicle related.  Like, turn on your lights when it's dark, foggy or raining idiot.  Use that turn signal like they taught you in driver's ed.   Stay off of my ass or pass.  Do not push an old lady on the brink.  And slow the eff down.  Life is not a race.

I refuse to even keep up with the political scene right now because it's all just a bunch of finger pointing on both sides.  That's not was governing should look like.  Aywho, y'all be merry and bright. ^j^

go fund me

I do a fundraiser online every year for something that means a lot to me.  The latest was Paws to Care.  If I see a friend that is raising money for a cause that is dear to their heart,  I pitch in.  Ten bucks ain't gonna' kill anybody and it's a nice tribute.

I am an active player in a family that is in recovery.  I do what I do and I don't get bitched at.  Reaves will grow up knowing that chill in moderation is a good thing.  We worry, about the genetic makeup that includes addiction on both sides.  I was married to an alcoholic/addict and he was a wonderful sweet caring man who did his best for the company and his family.  Lauren was a Daddy's girl, the one and only.  As for my mental health history there was a LOT of drama and tons of secrets.  Nobody ever told me a damn thing until I was older.  I just knew it was scary always having to put out the fires.  I didn't do that.  Mama and Daddy and Jim and Nancy did.

I was a new employee at Parkview Hospital when my uncle died from liver failure.  I called the fam and they were all scattered about living their lives in the fast lane.  I think I got Mama first.  

This was in about hmmmm....1980ish?  I believe he was in our first ICU unit with Della Campbell on board.  All I can remember is saying "what a waste of talent."  He was 36 years old.

His daughters were part of a band of girl cousins including me, Millette, Debbie, Sandy and Nancy.  Three of us are still alive.  Life is hectic for all of us.  I will never remember how bad I felt for not taking my parents to Mo's that night.  It was the last one besides Harborview.  Woulda, coulda shoulda.  I think most of reach a point where we're too tired to make the effort.  Bubba and Tommy were the only boys in that crew.

Boo and me picked up about a hundred pounds of pecans today because we love it.  But it does kick an old girl's ass in a hurry.  Ms Joy sat inside after lunch drinking water and reading Fannie Flagg.  Happy as a lark!

Love ya....mean it ^j^

you can't make this shit up

Today has been a lesson in humility for me, personally.  I went to church where I saw my warrior woman pastor crack a bit as she described the devastation on Friday night.  Two of our sister churches were destroyed in Dresden and Mayfield.  It reminded me of the story of Hannah Clem in Goshen Alabama on one random Palm Sunday.  God doesn't cause tragedy.  He helps us through it.

I went to lunch with a friend after that and there was a bunch of drama with my debit card getting stuck in the ATM.  Long story short is that after we went to get pliers to pull it out some kind soul found the ejected card and laid it on top of the ATM.  

I cried my way through the service this morning as the candle of Joy was lit.  Thank the Lord my friend understood the puffy eyes and let me vent.  I have two friends who are facing the same diagnosis and that scares the crap out of me, and them.  When I got home my pickin' buddy was soon to join me and we worked for two hours.  Bubba came by.  The usual Sunday afternoon.

I wish you enough ^j^

the morning after

Last night's storm was a doozie and we still don't know the extent of the damage.  There was heavy damage and two deaths in Lake County and it spread all the way up into Kentucky and Illinois where two factories collapsed trapping workers inside.  The death toll is expected to climb as search and rescue efforts continue.  I was sitting on the back porch at dusk when the tornado siren went off multiple times but we somehow dodged the bullet.  It went on all night and the rain and wind were so bad my ceilings were leaking.  Like over my bed!  I crawled up on the couch and Oscar was so freaked out he was shaking like a leaf and crawling all over me.  I had to give him half of a sedative to calm him down.  

Needless to say the pecans are EVERYWHERE.  There's probably a pound or two just on my deck. I knew it would be bad because it was 81 degrees in my house when I got home yesterday.  Had to turn on the air.  I'm not afraid of the weather but I have a healthy respect for Mother Nature, particularly with global warming in full force.  I roasted pecans during the storm and never lost power which is amazing.

Count your blessings.  You never know when life will be over ^j^

starting small

I am forever more a dreamer who is touched by many aspects of life and searches for little ways to make a difference.  I appreciate small things like people holding the door for me or being nice when they, in fact, hate their jobs.  

I saw a story today that really inspired me about a couple of professional musicians who recruited homeless folks to begin a choir. They were on America's Got Talent and all that.  This program is the ultimate to help people who are hopeless to have something to believe in.  Music is the universal language, or so they say.  It made me reflect on what I could have or can do to meet people where they are in life and be a mentor.  I've done it a thousand times not realizing that's what was happening but am so unorganized that it's a "one life at a time" thing.  Perhaps I should be content with that but I feel called to more.  

People do not become homeless or addicts because they choose to. Many times there are psychological issues that haven't been dealt with or even diagnosed.  You can't just tell somebody to put pull up their bootstraps when they have no boots.  I know there are people who can't help it and I totally understand that.  Others just need a helping hand to get out of the hole.  

I think it's what Jesus would do.   

easy come easy go

I am not very self confident when it comes to men.  I've always been everybody's buddy and nobody's somebody.  I went out on a limb and reached out to one prospect who told me he had a girlfriend who would cut him four ways to Jesus.  Lerd.  I don't need that kind of drama.  I've been single for so long I wouldn't know how to act anyway.  I consider it a win that I took the chance!  I may be old but I ain't dead yet.

The next two days will be devoted to pecan picking with my boo.  I ran that roller around for five minutes this afternoon and it works like a charm.  The wind has blown most of the leaves away so there ya' go.  A good time will be had by all including Oscar and Joy.  Y'all keep the faith with us ^j^

no news is good news

I have come to be of the mindset that if there is not a mass shooting, it's a good day.  If I'm alive and kicking, it ain't my time yet.  I attended a graveside service this morning that was simple and beautiful.  Taps and the flag folding always gets me in the gut.  

I woke up about 3:30 this morning down here in the flats with the wind full on from the west.  It was my first experience during my current tenure to be a witness to that.  I knew it was gonna' be big because it was so warm and foggy.  I could hear the pecans hitting the tin roof and the house was literally shaking.  I listened until the rain and thunder passed and went back to sleep. 

Lauren and Reaves are on the way to the Jackson Christmas parade.  At the age of 4, she is ripe for Santa Claus love and the joy of the season.  I can see it dancing in her little brown eyes.  We have focused on tradition as best we can but the poor nativity scene needs a new Joseph.  His head got broken off!  Baby Jesus, Mary and some of the others are intact.  If I can find the glue I'll work on Joseph's head.

Y'all be merry and bright.  'Tis the season ^j^

Elizabeth IV

My friend Cathy gave Reaves a baby doll complete with crib, high chair and all the fixings.  She and Lauren got here before I came home yesterday and she had already found the bounty.  After playing for awhile, I asked her what the baby's name is. "Elizabeth" she replied.  Just like her and her mom and me.  

All have Elizabeth in our names so the baby doll is 4th generation.  At church this morning I learned that the name Elizabeth, as in mother of John the Baptist means, "God is my oath."  I thought that was pretty cool.  The church was packed for a change because there is only one service now and I love it when the church is packed and a full choir on board.  It was glorious!  

Christmas is fast approaching and it's still warm and muggy...just right for a tornado or two.  I even had to turn on the AC Friday night and yesterday.  I'm craving fried chicken and the bird is thawing in the sink as I type.  I'll cook it Mama Stafford style, slow and crispy.  

Rejoice ^j^

dear diary

Today was busy busy and we covered a lot of miles.   It wears me out but I'm glad that I can actually get out the house which is where I sat for two years after retirement.  PTSD and all that.  I didn't know who I was outside of that hospital day in and day out.  Thank a nurse or an almost one when you get treated kindly.  You gotta' wanna' do that job with compassion.  Burnout is common.

I cried the last time I walked through to tell them I was done.  Martha said " Main Jane....did you not see this coming?"  My first RC surgery was pretty easy because it was just a snapped tendon from falling on ice.  Number 2 was the bad one where I had to choose between a replacement that would reduce my ROM or live with it.   Not too long after that my colon acted up and damn near killed me.  I'm pretty tough though, and obviously here for a reason.

One of my stops today was to get new surge protectors and I scored half price on bulbs at the garden center.  We're gonna' plant them at Mama and Daddy's grave before it freezes solid.  

I am not certain about anything because I know it' all in Big Ernie's hands.  I'm just a player doing what he intended for me when he counted all my toes and every hair on head.  

Believe ^j^