monsoon friday

I'm glad I didn't have a wedding or anything important planned for today because the heavens opened up about noon and I was soaked by the time I got home. I went by Money Mike's new location where his wife and sister? maybe? work. He still has no beer license and I've lost my ID so I had to go all the way to the Forrest St intersection where I was greeted by yet another cute gal with attitude and poor Sam who isn't very handy behind the counter. The new store is HUGE but the beer coolers will take up a lot of room. There's a whole case of incense and groovy pipes and of course hats and belts. And lottery....woohoo! Your E-cigarette needs can be found there as well. It used to be called The Pantry back in the day when I lived up the street.

When Mama went into the last care facility we applied (again) for Medicaid and had to come up with her life insurance policy. Now according to Daddy it's in the safe in the living room only the combination got removed during some fit of paranoia and we couldn't get in. Fast forward to today when mom is resting at home and the combination gets faxed and daddy is elated because he just knows there's 20K in there. Oh.My.Lord. I doubt there's anything other than some faded papers and a memory or two. I talked with a lifelong friend today about HIS father who is currently chilling at the place where Mom spent a couple of months. He got "one of those" calls last night with the nurse telling him that Joe was packed up and ready to go on his walker. Home. He told TLee he didn't need the clothes he brought for him because he would die there. How sad is that?

I found out today that a co-worker is leaving us and that makes me very sad. She's one of the toughest and brightest I've ever known in our field and I will miss her smart ass. She joins several others who are leaving our lives and it really points out to me how work peeps are family, a part of our personal fabric if you will. We spend just as much time with them as with blood kin and all the familial emotions are in play. At one point in my life I wanted to be "in charge" of something. At this point, I'm looking for a sugardaddy to get me out and on the road to neverland.

There have been times when I've doubted myself at work and learned from that experience. There have been other times when petty drama and paranoia have made my life hell on wheels. Mostly I've just tried to do the next right thing which means treating patients as family. Fortunately I've watched that kindness be repaid a hundred times over with my own care and that of my family. Imagine if you will, trying to figure out who your customer is when they are dropped off in your patient access area by ambulance, often in a life threatening situation. This is what the staff in the ERs across our country are faced with and a whole lot of the tragedy is caused by stupidity. Nobody in healthcare understands that life is short and then you die. It's all about the money.

I've been with many as they died over the years, some family and others friends of friends. Some of them were total strangers but they were in my charge and I always called on Big Ernie to make it a swift and peaceful passage for them because that's what I would want. I'll never forget the day Miss Ann passed over and I was piled up in the dark with her daughter and grandgirl listening to her last breaths. The doctor on call came in to pronounce her and said (i kid you not) "Well, we all knew this was gonna' happen, didn't we?" Holy moly. I don't claim to be perfect by any means. I've made a lot of mistakes in life and have paid dearly for them. In my book there was only one perfect one and that's who I try to emulate. With faith ^j^